crush on my boss
I have a coworker—he’s my boss (among other things)—who I’ve fallen for. We’ve been working together for years, and a few months ago I made it very clear to him for the first time that I like him. He reacted strongly, so I knew it had gotten to him. After a few weeks, we were at a company party, talked a lot, and got a little closer. A week later, everything was still okay at work, but then he got sick and we didn’t see each other for two weeks. When we saw each other again, he was acting weird. He was afraid to come over to me, and when we talked, he was super nervous. Since then, it’s been a crazy push-pull. He’s 40, has been single for years, might have a fear of commitment or intimacy, gets embarrassed easily (especially about anything related to his personal life), and finds a lot of things embarrassing. At work, he initiates physical contact, but it’s all stuff you can brush off as “just work.” I, on the other hand, touch him quite often, and I think he likes it too. I once asked him out on a date, which he flat-out refused (that was about 4 months after I went on the “offensive”). So, now I’m in a bind. I don’t know if this guy has feelings for me or not. When we talk, he stumbles over his words, and sometimes his face, neck, and ears turn red. Sometimes he does things on purpose: coming over to me, making up work excuses, rushing to the hair salon when I tell him to go, going over to other women and glancing at me to see “if I noticed.” Any suggestions?