Hot and Cold Behaviour in The Dating World
I really want to vent about this bc I've had similar incidents happen with men when it comes to dating and I need to know if I'm not alone on this.
So last week, I was in a talking stage with this dude where he initiated good morning texts, long emotional phone calls and asked me out on a date. Nothing sexual happened, we were just getting to know each other and I also told him that I'm okay if he changes his mind as long as I get a clear rejection. Just a day before the supposed date, he blocked me everywhere without any reason. We were literally having a normal convo before and he only showed major signs of interest (saying he can't do casual and he really likes talking to me).
Even tho this was a short stint, it triggered a wound I didn't realise, where in my previous relationship, my ex was somewhat similar. He would be really affectionate one day and super grumpy the next, with no fights in between. Just complete change in behaviour, which contributed towards the breakup. And even before him, a guy I was friends with (who seemed to like me), behaved the same way. He kept calling me, comforting me when I was anxious and made playlists for me but suddenly disappeared without any reason.
I'm really tired of dealing with men like these. I don't even date a lot bc my career is mostly my top priority. I only try dating when I feel like I'm in a good mood and have time to engage with somebody. But having this happen to like 3 times over the course of many years, I'm really befuddled.
Why do I keep running into dudes with avoidant tendancies? Is this how it's like for everybody in dating? Since I didn't get proper closure for all these incidents, my brain has a hard time processing all these events in my life. I'm also irritated by the time wasted. I just need to know why this is so weirdly prevalent in my experience 🥲