Leadership Skills Tested x 1M
I have gone through so much as a leader to this team in the past year and a half. And finally things had turned around and I got the dream team. Then one of my team members went out on sick leave and has been gone for months full of ups and downs, but we covered it. Then a newer team member started requiring more attention because they were not doing a great job and people requested not to work with them (clients and other employees). Had 5 documented convos, and they still have not taken any accountability and it is an ongoing shit show. I mistakenly mentioned putting them on a plan before I found out a term was approved, so now I have to go through with it. We offered them severance to leave and they are fighting it. My favorite boss ever left the company. And, another one of my team (my favorite) also became very ill. So now, I'm covering 3 jobs besides my own. Can't hire to replace people on leave. I had to send my dog over the rainbow bridge 2 weeks ago. And today, my favorite team member passed away. I am fucking shattered. It happened so fast. We never thought they wouldn't return from leave. Now I have to tell the team, one is out of the country on vacation, and I have a follow up meeting with the one that has performance issues tomorrow.
It's too much. It is so heavy, I'm struggling to make sure I do the right things. I have to stay diplomatic, empathetic and consistent while sharing terrible news, trying not to tell someone to just STFU and leave already and come up with plans to make it all work out without dropping anything. And, make sure I don't lose my mind. Fuck