u/cIitaurus

TW: discussion of rape and racist violence during slavery + question at the end about this subject.

This book….whew!! I highly recommend. I flew through this in a few days after picking it up from the library once I briefly skimmed the synopsis. Offering no spoilers, this book is basically about vampires and slavery. However, I will offer a huge trigger warning to those interested in reading for violence, gore, sexual assault, and racist language. The end of this book gave me the same feeling of pride that I felt when watching Get Out. If you like vampires and history, I think you’ll love this!

While reading this book, there are multiple scenes where some enslaved are raped by their master or overseers and part of me was wondering what purpose it serves to have scenes that dont just allude to sexual violence but have the reader experience it. I was reminded of the discourse around sexual assault in films and how many think it’s not necessary to have women be assaulted on screen as the audience will know whether or not said assault happened. And that showing it on screen is making rape into a type of misogynist spectacle. I don’t disagree with that but I think with art and especially one displaying the historical violence of slavery, it sometimes is a disservice to not show the full horrors of what our people went through. This book also has scenes where slaves are whipped almost to death, killed by bloodhounds, and violently abused. These are also forms of extreme violence that was quotidian on plantations and for runaways. I don’t think one form of violence is inherently worse than another even though sexual violence, especially during slavery, is often misogynistic in nature.

I say all this to ask how you all feel about reading books or watching media that have explicit violent scenes of any kind, especially book taking place during slavery? Do you think it is always unnecessary or serves a purpose?

Already prepared for the judgement from coworkers because I’m not talkative and don’t laugh at things I don’t find funny just to get along. And for me to constantly be guessing if I’m being too weird.

I actually enjoy my new job but I don’t know how to feel about the almost patronizing attempts to include me in conversations I don’t want to participate in.

yes, I use the heart pan whenever I can

I should’ve gotten another pair of these Doc Martens when I had the chance. These are definitely my favorite shoes right now and get compliments wherever I go with them. Do you wear boots in warm weather/summer?

Getting to wear what I want has done wonders for my mental health even though it sounds small 😭 Let me know if details are needed. I’ll try to add in the comments :)

I never really noticed veins before but I like how these looked

Good morning! I have a ton of collard greens growing in my garden and I don’t cook too often with them so I was wondering how you all like to cook/eat collard greens?

Of course there’s with seasoned meat which I’ve done with the greens as well as callaloo. Are there any other ways I should try?

Pic of one of my plants above :) Thanks in advance!✨

In case it is hard to see, I'll list the books below:

10/10 NO NOTES 5⭐️:

• Willow Weep for Me: A Black Woman's Journey Through Depression - Meri Nana-Ama Danquah
• Madness: Race and Insanity in a Jim Crow Asylum - Antonia Hylton
• My Sister the Serial Killer* - Oyinkan Braithwaite
• Wash Day Diaries - Jamila Rowser and Robyn Smith

REALLY GOOD 4⭐️:

• An American Marriage - Tayari Jones
• The Chromatic Fantasy - H.A.
• Radicalized - Cory Doctorow

(4.5✨)

• Love After Love* - Ingrid Persaud
• Smoke Kings - Jahmal Mayfield

GOOD BUT I DIDN'T REALLY LOVE IT 3⭐️:

• Jackson Alone - Jose Ando
• Reclaiming UGLY: A Radically Joyful Guide to Unlearn Oppression and Uplift, Glorify, and Love Yourself - Vanessa Rochelle Lewis
• Pregnant While Black - Monique Rainford, MD

(3.5✨)

• Good Dirt - Charmaine Wilkerson
• A Long Way from Doula - Max Lobe
• Fat Girls in Black Bodies: Creating Communities of Our Own - Joy Arlene Renee Cox, PhD

MEH! 2⭐️:

• I Got Abducted by Aliens and Now I'm Trapped in a Rom-Com - Kimberly Lemming
• History Lessons - Zoe B. Walbrook
• Last Night in Brooklyn - Xochitl Gonzalez

TERBS 1⭐️:

• Broughtupsy - Christina Cooke
• Written on Ice - Smardline S.

DNF:

• Out There Screaming: An Anthology of New Black Horror - Ed. Jordan Peele and John Joseph Adams
• Chocolate Chip City - Be Steadwell

* - rereads

Willow Weep for Me is still my favorite book that I’ve read so far this year. Madness was also AMAZING. Highly recommend both. Lmk if you all have also read any of these!

Also I did this myself on Canva so not too much! lol

Meh! I thought this book, its plot, and characters would be more interesting. Although I’m glad it was an easy read, it fell pretty flat to me and felt like it was overdoing the “I’m soooo Brooklyn” thing. I get the point but dont lol. 3/5⭐️

I like Lesser Evil but please 🤣

Edit: I didn’t know about Lesser Evil but thanks for letting me know! I won’t be buying anymore 😵‍💫

This is the second or third time that I've read Love After Love by Ingrid Persaud. She is an Indo-Trinidadian (of Indian descent) and writes this book from that perspective.

I looove this book and will always come back to it! I typically read books by Afro-Caribbean people so I'm glad to have this book which gives a look into what life may look like to an Indo-Trinidadian and Tobagian. I have also listened to the audiobook which is read by the author so if you are not familiar with Caribbean/Trinidadian dialects and speech patterns, I would recommend listening to that as well if you can.

I've included a picture of the back cover blurb if that's helpful. Without spoilers, the book follows a Trinidadian family as they work through life. The book explores themes of found family, abuse, grief, queerness, belonging, masculinity, and more. I hope you all read and enjoy! 🌟

Fun fact: the title of the book comes from St. Lucian poet and writer, Derek Walcott's, poem of the same name. I've included the poem as well to give you another idea of what the book explores.

*some spoilers*

I finished Smoke Kings a couple days ago and if I had to rate it it’d be 4/5⭐️!

This book had me on the edge of my seat, especially for the last portion. It was so well written and attention grabbing.

The writing and initial premise of getting reparations by force is what made the 4⭐️ but I was still hoping for something different with the ending. Also, some parts of the book felt like “we got S.A Cosby at home” ngl.

I also wasn’t really feeling the deeper discussions of race amongst the romantic relationships in the book. Especially Nate and his wife?? I know it’s a running thing that many Black power ✊🏾™️ men actually desire white women but it was just thrown in there at the end to make Nate more of a fallible, untrustworthy, or nuanced character I guess?

Joshua also deserved more time in the book. Why didn’t he have as close of a relationship with his brother as Nate? Why didn’t we get more into his background? What exactly is his role in the smoke kings group?

Ultimately, the ending felt rushed to me and that there were plot points thrown into the end which could have been worked out earlier in the book. I also was so frustrated with the final scene because I just wanted the Black people to win!! I get it though. It felt like if Get Out would’ve ended with Rose shooting Chris lol 😭

I really wish I had been a part of a book club when this came out and as I write this out, I’m changing my rating to 3.5⭐️ lol. Nonetheless, I finished the book so quickly because I couldn’t put it down! I’d reread and recommend it to others for sure. What did you guys feel about the book?

Help 😭! TLDR at the bottom because there’s extra context Sorry in advance for the length!

After we hung out last night, a person that I’ve known for 2 years and have been good friends for about a year sent me a voice message sharing that she has a crush on me. I feel really bad and haven’t responded yet because I’m not sure how to respond.

For context, we are both women on our 20s. She is lesbian and I am bisexual. A few months ago after hanging out with some of her friends, she told me while she was drunk that when we first met (at a Black queer pride event), she was attracted to me. This confession came after earlier in that night, one of her friends asked if we were dating and we (I truly hope it was both of us😭) laughed it off and said no and that we’re just friends even though shes gay and I’m bi. After that, I awkwardly mentioned a man that I started saying because I hadn’t shared that with her yet and I really really liked him. She was not interested at allllll and it was so awkward after that. I wish I never said anything lmfaoo. After that I just didn’t speak to her about him because I could tell she didn’t care, which wasnt that serious to me because I have other friends to talk about him to if I wanted.

She also told me that the first time we hung out alone after that she was hoping it was a date. I ended up basically ghosting her for a few months because I went to a bad depression and ultimately she was not yet a close friend. She told me that after my ghosting she was over her attraction. I was just like “oh….” because I didn’t know what to say. Then I joked that I never know when women are interested in me then we moved on.

Now months later, she sends this voice message after we hung out last night at a sapphic pride event and had lots of fun! I’ve genuinely never expressed romantic interest as far as I can tell so I feel bad because I don’t like rejecting others especially not someone I only saw as a friend. But also, she’s never asked me about the guy I was dating even though she also met him at my birthday because it was more serious at that point. This also catches me off guard because I truly treat her as I do my other close friends. I only talk to my best friend daily bc we’re long distance and my other close friends I hang out with a few times a month and speak to a few times a week.

Admittedly, I would try to distance myself from her in some ways because she would call me verryy often and would want to hang out alot. This isn’t inherently annoying because we’re friends but I don’t need to be with a friend this much especially as someone who is neurodivergent. Even though I’m social and make friends easily this can be draining.

I enjoy being her friend but it is hard to me to be someone’s main friend and feel like I have to be present 24/7. I can say that I don’t know how to say no often so I do feel drained sometimes being in that role. I’ve even found myself not referring to my best friend as a mf best friend when around her because I didn’t want to even potentially make things awkward. I suspected but know I’m certain that she didn’t just want to be my best friend but also date.

To be very clear, this isn’t about her being lesbian even though sometimes I have felt that she ignores my bisexuality. I am just not attracted to her in that way and want to remain friends.

TLDR: A friend of mine sent me a voice message sharing that she has a crush on me and I don’t know what to do. She has shared that she was attracted to me before but said she was over that so she moved on so I moved on as well. if you’ve experienced rhis, how have you dealt with this? TIA :)

book club is reading Jackson Alone by Jose Ando so that’s what I came for but I left with all these too lol. If anyone’s read Jackson Alone or any of these, lemme know how they are! :)

I just had to end a relationship yesterday and I am just very very sad to say the least. I’m making a playlist as a distraction/an attempt to get all the crying out 😭.

I’m mostly curious about what songs other people listen to fresh after a break up and also want some more songs to add. These are the ones I’ve put in so far. It’s mostly newer R&B and I want songs from any era that will make me cry and potentially feel worse lmaooo thanks in advance :)🫶🏾

Usually I would have been to more shows by now. But I saw FatM for the first time ever after being a fan since I was about 9/10 years old. It was my second? solo concert and was everything I could have wanted! I cried multiple times and left sooo happy and light.

and I saw Elmiene a few days afterwards. He’s been one of my favorite artists for the past few years and this is my second time seeing him perform. He was amazing as per usual!

I wish I would’ve gotten someone to take a full picture of my FatM outfit but a mirror pic doesn’t hurt🌟

Like many others, I am a big fan of Black Cake and recommend it often to others. So when I saw this book in the library, I picked it up because I obviously enjoyed her work so far.

I just finished Good Dirt and it took me about a week to finish. It has the same short chapter structure with brief looks into different character’s lives and through time as Black Cake which helps make it an easy read imo.

I think I could have finished it sooner but I started to lose intrigue towards the last 100 pages of the book. There were a few characters who I didn’t think needed as much focus as they got and personally, I felt the story started to center white characters unnecessarily even though the book centers around a wealthy Black family in the northeast who naturally will be around white people. I think I also just wanted to finish it already so the last 50 pages weren’t as enjoyable and felt fluffy.

If I had to rate it, I give it a 3/5 ⭐️ because it is well written and I like the exploration of family dynamics through death and a family heirloom. I still think you should read it if you’re interested though.

Has anyone else read this? If so, how did you feel about it? :)