u/catzing

Hello. So I(24ftm) have severe depression, I always have, and lately I havent been able to force myself to shower. Now before people come saying it's gross, I know. I generally consider myself a clean person until lately. I sweep daily and vacuum multiple times a week. My car is clean and vacuumed. My cats litter is scooped three times a day. I wash walls and registers and shampoo my couch every other month, one thing that often gets neglect is dishes, but even then not to the typical depression level, just work a lot. But it's like showering is the biggest task in the world. It makes me feel better and I enjoy being clean and I do force myself in twice a week. I brush my teeth and wear deoderant etc daily, and Ive asked people around me directly if I stink and everyone has said no, but I just feel disgusting.

When I do shower, I have an entire routine. After not showering I feel gross and often exfoliate a lot and double scrub areas like privates and pits, along with after shower stuff such as lotion and witch hazel etcetc. It really gets to me because I used to do this daily, if not twice, along with the whole schbang of after shower products. Now Im lucky if I can do it once a week. Even then when I do shower I take an hour and it's usually after being up in the late night/early morning for hours hyping myself to do it. Which is an issue since I work a 7-8 with a half hour commute, as well as having a seizure disorder triggered by lack of sleep.

Ive tried everything Ive seen online. Things like dark showers, music, podcasts, shower chairs. Nothing helps. Im not even sure if it is a depression thing, I am at such a loss and it feels embarrassing to even talk about online let alone irl.

Has anyone experienced getting auras without having a TC? I get bad auras sometimes, but I dont get a TC most times. I have only had auras before a TC once and the rest have had no warning signs. However I deal with some dissociation and anxiety as is, plus stomach issues. Sometimes I get that rising feeling and the sense of dread, but I never have a TC and am still coherent and conscious, plus I remember it after. Has anyone experienced this?

Hello! I(24f) started having seizures about three years ago. There is no known "cause" that they have found yet, and Im still getting testing and med trials done.

Im currently on 250mg of Lamictil and 500mg of Keppra. I am SO tired all the time. My current neurologist said that Lamictil does not cause drowsiness and actually can cause the reverse, but Im exhausted. I literally get home at 6pm, typically fall asleep until 9-10pm, then Im up for maybe 2 hours to get my needs done, if Im lucky. Then I end up sleeping late around 11pm-12am and am still exhausted at 8 when I get up. I used to be able to get up on 5 hours of sleep and no naps, and Im still young with no known other causes.

Is this my meds? Has anyone else experienced this?

It is literally effecting all aspects of my life. I only see my partner on weekends and Im falling asleep by 8pm through the whole night, so we squabble a lot. I cannot see my family as much as Id like because even when Im awake Im too tired to function. I dont get as many chores done as Id like to keep my living space clean. I dont cook myself meals or anything. Even when Im awake Im so exhausted I can feel my eyeballs in my head. Im so lost and this didnt start until my seizures started. I just want to know if anyone has had similar experiences

Hello! So I am 24, Ive been having seizures for about 4 years now with no found cause or diagnosis.

A little (skippable) backstory to put my issue into perspective, I come from a very abusive home. I am LGBT and have different political views than my family as well as some members having issues with schizophrenia and paranoia. I moved out right at 18 in 2020 and bought my own car right off. I live in an extremely rural area where we do not have a taxi, uber, bus, or literally *any* form of public transport, and everything is at least 30 minutes away from each other due to how things are spread between towns. Since I was 18 Ive been driving myself 30 min to work and another 30 from work. I drove myself to visit my mother who is supportive but struggling with mental health and would help her pick up or fill her med counter etc. I drove myself to and from hangouts with my close friend group. Drove myself to my own therapy appointments and more. I am now completely dependent on my partner to drive me around in my own car which he is now using to go to and from work as otherwise it will just sit there. My partner and I work opposite shifts and I am lucky that I now live in the town I work so I am only 15 minutes away so he often drives me to work then goes home. However he works 3pm-1am and getting up he is often tired the rest of the day. His mom brings me home and to most of my other obligations if he is not available.

Ive basically had all my independence ripped from me. It is impossible to do anything in the town I live in without a car. My friendships are dwindling, I dont see my family more than twice a month since Im limited to weekends which are often spent catching up on chores and groceries with my partner since we cannot during the week due to work, and many of them are elderly or ill. I am also the only support my mother had and have not been able to help as much. I am severely depressed chronically and this is all exacerbating it.

I recently had a spat with my partner. I dont even really remember what it started as but he ended up saying "I dont do anything! My entire life revolves around spending time with you and carting you around and helping you!". He later apologized that night but I cannot get it out of my head. I have been asking for less now and secretly driving at times when I badly need to help my mother with things. I moved from my hometown to his (only 30 minutes away) to be together when his roommates moved out, so now I dont see them. Ive brought this up to him before and he says he doesnt see his often either. I bring up that he does almost daily or at least calls with them and he says it isnt "real time". I started smoking again because Im terribly stressed. My Lamotrigine is at 250 twice a day and 500 of Keppra twice a day. That on top of depression basically all I do is sleep. I work at a prek so Im already exhausted when Im home and my meds and depression make it worse. I dont have hobbies anymore and even if I did most require driving to them. I dont even smoke weed anymore when I used to be a daily user as I also have Crohns.

How do I handle this? Is there anything *to* do? I have gotten my license back before when I was 3 months seizure free but I often have a seizure soon after. Driving in general scares me as well since I often dont have auras and dont know when theyre coming or what causes it. Is there anything I can tell myself to comfort or give hope? I am kind of just stuck in limbo being miserable because Im completely reliant on the people around me. I feel isolated and like Im burdening everyone I know