u/checkyamarshmallows

Let me preface this by saying that I’m not in the medical field at all, but I am an expert in surgeries at this point. Even without my gender affirming surgeries, I’ve still had more than most.

For 2 surgeries I became severely constipated, so much so that I had to be manually disimpacted. Since then, I’ve come up with a couple ways to make sure that never happens again.

I also had phallo recently and was able to poop on post-op day 2- i was farting up a storm on day 1 lol. It didn’t hurt at all and was actually quite soft. So for what it’s worth, here are some tips to avoid constipation.

1. Eat soft, easily digestible foods 2 days before surgery. My surgery was on a Monday so starting Saturday, I only ate pudding, jello, popsicles, broths, and smoothies. I think this also helped with bowel prep (only needed 1 enema).

2. Drink lots of water. This is obvious and goes without saying, but I’ll say it anyways. Stay hydrated! Drinking plain water after surgery sucks in my opinion, so I’d often have electrolytes put in to encourage new to drink more. The faster you can flush the anesthesia, the better you’ll feel. I will note that I didn’t take any narcotics post-op. I was on ketamine for the first few days, which probably slowed things down, but not that much. I know taking pain meds will cause constipation, so staying hydrated is that much more important. Also, this may seem obvious, but anti-nausea medication can also cause constipation.

3. Do not eat anything solid post-op until you are passing gas. Once you start farting, that’s a sign that your bowels are “waking up” from anesthesia. For the first day or two post-op I usually stick to smoothies, protein shakes, smoothies, and pudding. This is tried and true for me. I was hungry after surgery but I’d rather have the discomfort of hunger pains than having to push a rock-solid turd out, or worse, having to scoop it out.

4. Stool softeners are your best friend, especially post vaginectomy. I took 2 stool softeners daily until I pooped for the first time. Since then, I’ve done 1 per day and that has helped keep things soft and comfortable.

Once again, I’m not a doctor and this approach may not be right for everyone but constipation is a huge worry for me after surgeries and doing these things has helped me out immensely.

Hello fellas! I am about 11 days post-op stage 1 with all the features (phallus creation, UL lengthening and hookup, vsginectomy, scrotoplasty, and glansplasty).

Showering is an ordeal, but going well so far. However, I feel like I should be washing my scrotum. Today I had my wife point the shower head at it on a soft setting but I’m not sure if that is good enough. Touching down there feels weird right now since it’s all numb, but I also want to make sure I’m keeping things as clean as I can. Tips are appreciated (pun intended)!

As the title says, I am 1 week post phalloplasty with burial, UL, scrotoplasty, and vaginectomy.

I just need some reassurance that oozing from the vaginectomy site is normal. Yes, I’ll be seeing my surgeon in a few days and will discuss with him, but until then…Reddit it is.

The oozing doesn’t smell great, but isn’t horrendous. It’s mostly light brown with some light yellow. It doesn’t hurt, I don’t have a fever, and my wife was able to take a look at it and said it looks fine.

She also noticed that on the top of my penis, where the sutures are, it also looks like it’s oozing a bit.

Stage 1 is in 2 days and I’m starting to get even more anxious. I know this is something I want and need, but I’m still scared.

What if the sight of my dick after surgery repulses me? What if I regret it? Is this really what I want?

I know I’m not the only one, but I would appreciate any wisdom or insight you all have.

I’m having stage 1 soon and am planning to take off 12 weeks though FMLA and short-term disability benefits. If all goes well, I could return to work sooner but my surgeon wants me propping my guy up for 3 months and I don’t want to walk around at work looking like I’m rock hard.

That being said, I do want to get stage 2 as soon as I can but if I deplete my 12 weeks of FMLA then I’d have to wait 12 months until I can take more time off.

How much time did you take off for stage 1 and stage 2 (if you’ve had it)?

If it’s useful to know, I’m having RFF phallo with burial, UL, vaginectomy,, and scrotoplasty. My surgeon is Dr. Gallegos, and I’ve heard he does glansplasty in stage 1 but it isn’t showing up on my procedure list so I would assume it is not happening in this first stage.

I know the girth of the penis can change with weight loss. Did any one you lose a significant amount of weight after surgery and if so, how did it change your size?

I’m currently at about 18% body fat. I would
like to get down to about 10-12% once I am recovered. For me, that would be about 11lb of fat. But I also don’t want to end up with a skinny dick.

I had a total hysterectomy almost 2 years ago, no complications, no pain or bleeding since the initial recovery period. Occasionally, I get an intense pressure/pain in my rectum. It isn’t constant and I probably experience it 1-3 times in a 14 day period. No blood in stool, no rectal bleeding. Never had penetrative sex in any way.

It typically comes on before or after I poop and doesn’t typically last long. The longest I’ve felt it is about 15 minutes. I’ve had several surgeries over the last 5 years, 2 of which I experienced severe post-op constipation. I’ve had to disimpact myself a few times (yes, I know, not good to do, but I was desperate). I have had hemorrhoids in the past but I don’t think I currently do. I will say, I think that I experience the pressure and pain when I am not as regular as I usually am.

I have phalloplasty scheduled for June 22nd and am scared of waking up from anesthesia and the surgery not having been performed. However, having an exam on that part of my body is equally distressing, if not more so. I have scheduled an appointment with my PCP, but that isn’t for another couple weeks and I’m going to be incredibly anxious until I see her. In the meantime, I’m just looking for either an educated guess, or some peace of mind. Pretty much anything is better than just waiting.

What could this be? I don’t feel like anything is “hanging out” or “stuck” before and after bowel movements. I think I provided enough info, but please let me know if there’s additional info I can provide.

I haven’t seen this talked about on this sub. I could be missing it, but for those of you post-op stage 1, was your core sore/weak in the days and weeks after surgery?

44 days out from surgery and I’m started to get anxious, excited, scared…all the emotions. What did you do leading up to surgery to prepare: emotionally, physically, etc?

Starting to gather post-op recovery supplies, consistently in the gym, finishing up hair removal, and talking through my fears and what not with my wife and therapist. It makes me feel better to do something other than just waiting 44 days. Yes, yes, I know “keep myself busy.” I have an 11 month old, so trust me, I stay busy. But still, curious to hear what the rest of you did and felt leading up to the big dance.

I see a lot of posts saying “my (FTM/MTF) spouse started transitioning and doesn’t do _____ anymore” or “my spouse is different/has changed/seems like a different person/etc” and I just want to say that that isn’t really normal. Not in my experience. I came out and made all these physical changes but I stayed the same person, just a happier, more confident version. I’m not speaking for all trans people, but from what I’ve seen in my local community as well as a bunch of people online, transitioning shouldn’t change your *personality*, not drastically anyways.

There’s a lot of self-discovery that comes with transition. From the day we are born we are expected to act and dress a certain way based on our sex. So when you no longer have to force yourself to fit that mold, it’s earth-shattering. I felt like I didn’t know who I was at first. But that passed, and with therapy and lots of open communication with my wife, it got better. I’m learning to stop smothering the man I am and leaving the woman I never was behind. Have I changed? Sure, but not fundamentally. I’m still me. I’m a goofball and I’m sensitive and I treat my wife the same as before. Except I love her more, because I love myself more (cheesy, I know)

I doubt anyone will read all the way through this post. I just wanted to say that for those of you who have a trans partner, it is completely normal for things to be a bit turbulent after your partner comes out and/or transitions. It took me and my wife about 6 months to finally feel stable again. It doesn’t always work out when one partner comes out as trans, but it can work. It may be uncomfortable and terrifying, but it is possible. I’m tired as hell and will probably regret being vulnerable to strangers on the internet but I know that I could have used a post like this when I first came out. I scoured all the trans subs for positive stories about partners staying together and there weren’t a ton.