u/chemthrowaway123456

For anyone who might not know, I’m a Korean adoptee with an extraordinarily Polish last name.

I had an appointment with a new doctor the other day. She asked about my last name and assumed it’s my husband’s. I told her it’s actually my maiden name and it’s Polish because I’m adopted. We proceeded to have the following exchange:

> ”Oh! Where were you adopted from?”

> “Korea.”

> ”Have you been back? Have you met your birth family?”

> “Yep. I went in 2015 and met everyone.”

> ”Your parents and…do you have siblings?”

> “Yep. I met my parents, three sisters, a brother, three brothers-in-law, four nephews, a niece, and an aunt.”

> “Oh wow! That’s beautiful!”

> “Mhm.” [Nods and smiles]

It wouldn’t surprise me if she thinks I have nothing but positive feelings about my adoption. But that’s not the case at all. I didn’t feel like discussing the more complicated aspects of my adoption though, so I just nodded, smiled, and left it at that.

Who knows, maybe she went home and told an adoption nay-sayer, “I had a patient today who’s an adoptee and she’s fine and thinks her adoption is beautiful!”

Just a friendly reminder that not everyone feels comfortable discussing every aspect of their adoption with anyone who broaches the topic. So while I may seem “fine” to her, the truth is more complicated.

(Edit; Italics)