Has anyone recovered from severe burnout without leaving academia?
I’m trying to work out whether I’m experiencing a prolonged period of burnout that I can recover from, or whether I’m reaching a point where academia is no longer sustainable for me. I'd love to hear from people who have experienced similar.
For context, I am neurodivergent with some long-term mental health issues, I went through a bunch of difficult personal circumstances during my PhD, and I'm in STEM (wet-lab based, UK). Overall I really enjoyed my PhD, I submitted my thesis last year and was still pretty sold on a career in academia. I went straight into a 6 month postdoc that I didn't enjoy (the project was flawed from the start, supervisor was micromanaging, I had a long commute). After that, I was fortunate enough to land a two year postdoc fellowship that is my ideal academic situation on paper.
I'm 5 months in now and there are loads of things to love. I have total freedom to explore the research I want, I'm living in the city I want to be in, and my sponsors are really supportive. Problem is, I'm barely coping. I'm 1 month back to work after almost 2 months of sick leave which really helped at the time -- I started doing my hobbies again, and being able to exercise lightly or see friends without it wiping me out, I eat well, journal etc, and I'm trying to do all the right things to keep those -- but I'm still exhausted.
I'm mostly struggling with executive functioning demands rather than actually disliking the job. I can't seem to narrow my research direction, and the independence feels really isolating. My research is cross-disciplinary and noone at my university is working in the specific research area I'm in. My love for the work is still there -- I'm writing a review paper and really enjoying it -- I just can't get myself into the lab or make any big decisions because I'm so tired. I have a fairly detailed experimental plan for the next few months but it's mostly reproducing/learning from others' work, and it's difficult to imagine myself achieving anything novel.
A therapist mentioned over a year ago that I fit the criteria for severe burnout alongside neurodivergent burnout, but I guess I underestimated how long recovery would take. I think about quitting often, but I love research, I love teaching/mentoring, I love the competition, conferences, reading, writing, seminars, the environment; so I don't want to make a rash decision.
Has anyone been in a situation where they still loved research and had a good academic environment, but simply couldn't function because of burnout? Did you eventually recover and continue in academia? I don't want to walk away from an amazing opportunity, but I'm also worried I'm trying to force myself to continue in something that I cannot sustain right now.