Is this horrible coaching or am I just being sensitive? 😭 (Win at Life group coaching, Kitty Blomfield)
This is the Win at Life group coaching Slack group. I had joined the program myself but now I cannot unsee so much of the coaching going on in here and in this instance my heart breaks for this woman who is in the program 😭 She has ADHD and I know ADHD well as I have it also. A quick background, when someone wants to be coached or lose fat they tell everyone to eat the exact same meals every day (not just hit their macros but repeat the same food and meals every day), identical food without swaps or flexibility at all.
This woman checked in and said she’d hit her macros and even added the proof from the app showing it. The coaches publicly accused her of lying about the food she eats??? They said to her that she needs to focus less on making the daily targets look perfect and more on logging accurately what she is actually eating. She said she was accurately logging, that she actually did hit her macros. They still called her a liar. How can they know for certain she is not eating what she is tracking? Is this not insane to accuse someone of?
That is the first red flag but then for someone with ADHD, forcing identical meals every single day is almost designed to set them up to fail. ADHD brains struggle with rigid routines sometimes and executive function
Then publicly calling her a liar on top of that is especially damaging. ADHD also can come with rejection sensitivity and a long history of being disbelieved or told they’re not trying hard enough. Accusing someone of lying when they say and show they hit the numbers seems harmful and toxic. I'm hurting for her, I cannot bring myself to "check in" as I have seen this style of coaching from them, especially since the group coach who was beautiful and empathetic and actually helpful got fired recently. This style of coaching can't possibly be helpful and isn't everyone an individual and has different needs? Also I can see this produce people-pleasing and fear of the coaches, or complete dropout, I can't see that helping anyone long-term? I am adding the screenshots in order. She handled it so well but it made me sad. Am I correct in this or is it just tough love/coaching?? 😭
