u/crowcatsle

Hi everyone!!

Me and my girlfriend have been together for 2 years, and it’s been amazing. The only thing that has hurt our relationship is my fear of her liking men. It’s made me more insecure and made me subconsciously controlling of like what movies she watches and stuff like that. We talk about this a lot, and i am actively working on not letting it get to the point of being super controlling. My girlfriend has told me it’s getting better.

But, even if i’m not expressing it around her, i still feel it. If she’s watching a show and i know there’s straight sex in it or something to do with a guy in a romantic context I get so worried, and i hate it! It’s so stupid and weird. I know she loves me, i feel it all the time, but for some reason i just can’t shake this worry that she will be attracted to a man.

We both identify as lesbians and she has expressed numerous times she only likes and is attracted to women/non men, and especially me.

Does anyone have any advice for getting over this? I really don’t want it to keep hurting our relationship and my mental health.

Hi!!
Me and my girlfriend have been together for 2 years now.

When we used to have sex, afterwards I felt like we were on the same page of like still feeling pretty horny and lovey dovey and stuff, no matter if it was me doing her last or her doing me last. There was always aftercare, and like a nice easing out of it.

But recently, if we finish with her doing me, she switches up so fast. Like I will have an orgasm and still be recovering and sitting there and she will just start talking about other things and move on so fast, it makes me a bit sad.
When I do her, I can’t even fathom thinking about anything else until way later.
I’m not mad at her and i don’t think she’s doing anything wrong at all!! I love her so much, i’m just trying to understand.
I have talked to her a bit about it, and she’s said she understands, but has continued to do it. She sometimes will just kind of go to bed after and not really say anything which also makes me sad, i understand if she’s tired but it feels so abrupt especially after such an intimate moment.

I just want to understand this better and figure out what to say, I want sex to be as enjoyable as it can be for both of us.