u/ctrlzeke

Starting at $15!

Are there any left-leaning churches in the area (or world at this point lol)? Where LGBTQ+ folks are truly welcome, not just in a "you're welcome to join so we can change your" sort of way? And where there's not a political agenda to vote one way or another, or an agenda to support any war?

I'm just so burnt out by church culture. I'm a long-time believer, but the political climate has turned a lot of folks proud, inhumane, and certainly not following Christ's actual example as laid out in Phil 2:1-10.

My heart is for my community- the people who are so hurt by what the church has been doing, by what their Christian parents are doing, that they choose suicide over a life under such emotional abuse. There's real religious trauma there, and I want to create a community that helps bridge that gap, become a place for people to heal from that, and truly feel like they belong. I want to be able to partner with a church in this, because I can't do it alone, and I myself need a place to call home again, like I once had in Hampton Roads.

I live Southside of the bridge, preferably in the VA beach, Nfk area. I'll take any denomination at this point, because it seems like I'm seeking a unicorn. Please send recommendations!

Also if you disagree with any of this, then don't reply. This thread is not for you, keep moving.

I'm at a weird stage in my life: almost 40yo, having drawn professionally for over 20 years, and having always been drawing since childhood, and now I'm feeling like I'm at the end of a whole identity... I feel like I'm giving up on something that's been my identity for my entire existence, and idk what to think or do.

I've found that my lifetime of art has come in stages... In childhood, I was observing and copying everything. In youth, I began to form characters and stories. I was experimenting with style and thus building my identity as an artist. I would experiment with mediums, subject matters and a wide range of creative endeavors, but by teenhood, I had decided what kind of an artist I was, and what I wanted to become.

I had determined in my teens that I wanted to study comics, and thus I went on to do so in college. In college, I was challenged to develop style, craftsmanship, knowledge and understanding. I was forming a professionalism about my work and art wasn't just about experimentation and play: art had a goal, a structure, a standard to reach.

In early adulthood, I experimented less, was more honed into my art path. While I still occasionally dabbled in other mediums and crafts, I was clearly a story artist with a focus on creating relatable characters, narratives that challenged the readers' perspective, and a desire to evoke SOMEthing out of the reader whether it was a laugh, a thought, an emotion...

But I was also a professional artist by that point. It was my sole income. I was working with a multitude of clients, and in doing so for many years I lost that identity as an artist. Story took a backseat to making the client happy, and their requests became what I was known for- not my ideas. Society shaped a brand for me that differed from my personal work, but I was okay having those two very separate identities. I was able to keep a healthy balance between work art and personal art.

Fastforward, I suffered a career-ending cancelling that ruined my life in every way, destroyed my confidence, created PTSD, forced me out of an entire life and identity I had built. I've been wrecked ever since, and art which was once my voice, has become my source of trauma.

There is no rebuilding anything, and not for lack of trying. These past five years have been a tumultuous, failed attempt to rebuild my business, my passion, my identity, resulting in nothing but nihilism, and the realization that everything that I formed my purpose and identity on, is in fact, meaningless.

Now, when I put the pen to the page with an idea in mind, all I can immediately think is: "why draw it? No one will see it. It won't matter. The idea is just as complete as actually drawing it, so why waste the energy?"

And please note: the physical act of drawing isn't why I draw, and never had been. My art has always been about story. It's my expression. It's my voice. No one speaks because they just like the feeling of forming words. In the same way, I don't draw just to move my hand back and forth on a piece of paper. The only joy is in sharing, and it being heard and seen. So whenever people say: just draw to have fun, just draw what you like, don't care about what others think- it does not help me.

So now what do I do? I'm at this awful stage where I've become so pessimistic about my art that I can't bring myself to waste the time in making it, but also NOT creating art is the most depressing state to be in.

I'm at my wits end. I'm seeking feedback, shared experiences, anecdotes, new perspectives, anything to get me out of this horrible state of limbo. But also please be kind in doing so. I'm at a very mentally fragile point in my life. I'm not looking for tough love right now. Thank you for hearing me out, and respecting my boundaries. And thank you in advance for your time in responding.

I'm at a weird stage in my life: almost 40yo, having drawn professionally for over 20 years, and having always been drawing since childhood, and now I'm feeling like I'm at the end of a whole identity... I feel like I'm giving up on something that's been my identity for my entire existence, and idk what to think or do.

I've found that my lifetime of art has come in stages... In childhood, I was observing and copying everything. In youth, I began to form characters and stories. I was experimenting with style and thus building my identity as an artist. I would experiment with mediums, subject matters and a wide range of creative endeavors, but by teenhood, I had decided what kind of an artist I was, and what I wanted to become.

I had determined in my teens that I wanted to study comics, and thus I went on to do so in college. In college, I was challenged to develop style, craftsmanship, knowledge and understanding. I was forming a professionalism about my work and art wasn't just about experimentation and play: art had a goal, a structure, a standard to reach.

In early adulthood, I experimented less, was more honed into my art path. While I still occasionally dabbled in other mediums and crafts, I was clearly a story artist with a focus on creating relatable characters, narratives that challenged the readers' perspective, and a desire to evoke SOMEthing out of the reader whether it was a laugh, a thought, an emotion...

But I was also a professional artist by that point. It was my sole income. I was working with a multitude of clients, and in doing so for many years I lost that identity as an artist. Story took a backseat to making the client happy, and their requests became what I was known for- not my ideas. Society shaped a brand for me that differed from my personal work, but I was okay having those two very separate identities. I was able to keep a healthy balance between work art and personal art.

Fastforward, I suffered a career-ending cancelling that ruined my life in every way, destroyed my confidence, created PTSD, forced me out of an entire life and identity I had built. I've been wrecked ever since, and art which was once my voice, has become my source of trauma.

There is no rebuilding anything, and not for lack of trying. These past five years have been a tumultuous, failed attempt to rebuild my business, my passion, my identity, resulting in nothing but nihilism, and the realization that everything that I formed my purpose and identity on, is in fact, meaningless.

Now, when I put the pen to the page with an idea in mind, all I can immediately think is: "why draw it? No one will see it. It won't matter. The idea is just as complete as actually drawing it, so why waste the energy?"

And please note: the physical act of drawing isn't why I draw, and never had been. My art has always been about story. It's my expression. It's my voice. No one speaks because they just like the feeling of forming words. In the same way, I don't draw just to move my hand back and forth on a piece of paper. The only joy is in sharing, and it being heard and seen. So whenever people say: just draw to have fun, just draw what you like, don't care about what others think- it does not help me.

So now what do I do? I'm at this awful stage where I've become so pessimistic about my art that I can't bring myself to waste the time in making it, but also NOT creating art is the most depressing state to be in.

I'm at my wits end. I'm seeking feedback, shared experiences, anecdotes, new perspectives, anything to get me out of this horrible state of limbo. But also please be kind in doing so. I'm at a very mentally fragile point in my life. I'm not looking for tough love right now. Thank you for hearing me out, and respecting my boundaries. And thank you in advance for your time in responding.