Father SA'ed me for years. Need lawyer for POSCO case.
Hi, I (18m) have a court date on 1st of sept in karkardooma district court for a POSCO case and need help finding a lawyer - my own family and relatives aren't trustworthy and friends dont know any so dont have any connections.
[TLDR AT BOTTOM]
I dont wish to waste your time so i will write everything in pointers and wrap it up quickly.
If i come off as indifferent to the event, its because i am indifferent and numb to these events now.
I lived with my dad, brother and mother. After my grandpa dies, dad makes the stupid decision to send my mother to take care of my grandma to our hometown (instead of calling grandma here idk why).
Brother is mostly out cause of studies and for years i go thru non-penetrative SA by my dad.
From an age where i dont know whats wrong or right, for so long that i go numb to the experience and normalize it in my head.
I believe this event gave me a lot of emotional trauma like being numb to emotions for a large part of my life, feeling detached, depressed, serious self harm with about 70 cuts still visible.
Always have been distant with him, wanting to do something right after 18 to live by myself for reasons i couldnt explain, now i realize it was because i always knew he was a danger to me even tho i put the events in the back of my head and tried to forget them.
Now again fast forward when i grow up (11th - 12th) my mother is living with me, grandma too and brother is in odisha cause he got a job. Around this time I realized my dad is the reason of my fucked up mental health i decide to do something about it, any way to get away from him the moment i turn 18.
Life got worse as memories flooded in, battled with suicidal tendencies for a long time, felt i was 'impure' and still continue to do, grades got worse, his taunts got worse, wanted to end it all but realized i was above it, though i still needed to get away from it all because i had enough.
I started working on a plan to file a case and run away from my home, however one day he crashed out on me - i said fuck this shit and crashed out too. I told him how he has always been an atm machine and never a father, doesnt even know me as a person, doesnt know i have made over 200 self harm cuts, cheated and prolly still cheats on mum and biggest of all, i havent forgotten about the SA.
He tried to call me but i cut the call (i wanted him to reply in text). He calls grandma in the other room and tells her to give the phone to my mum, to who he says "(myname) se phone lelo, iska kuch zyada hi ho rha hai".
After that i lie to my mother that im going to the library to calm down, and i run away to my friends house.
Now i will go over this even quicker.
i contact the school and get an FIR registered {while i was still 17 btw] and all but i thought i am gonna get financial support and so would my mother, my research was GRAVELY wrong.
i will be sent to an ashram forced to end my CBSE 12th class boards, mother sent to hometown with shame (she mightve killed herself with that fate).
even if i get 'justice', my financial stability is destroyed if my father goes to jail.
i spend a night in some government kids facility thing, next day im escorted and my dad's boss bribes the guard to talk to me, i say im taking back the case he says good.
in court i deny deny deny, my fathers lawyers talk to me to tell me what to do.
things settle down and he bails out.
fast forward more, i have to report to CWC on 6th august to settle the case, a day after my 18th birthday.
my brother supports me and came back, my mother is uncertain who to trust and i have a good fucking job and have decided to revive the case on 6th. but when i go there n tell the truth they say im 18 and cwc is closing it now.
a few days ago me, brother and mum have shifted houses out of concern of my safety, i am paying all the major expenses now with my job and want to hire a lawyer to win my case. my biggest proof is that a father wouldnt say "iska kafi ho gaya isse phone lelo" after being accussed of SA'ing his child.
and realistically speaking, people often take cases back because of financial pressure, right?
my mother has been talking to my father behind my back so if she has any chat msgs i can use, i will (prolly nothing tho). dad has been trying to manipulate her to get her on his side obv.
thats the whole story, i am requesting that if you know any capable lawyer which you trust for this case, i would really fucking appreciate the help. my budget would be 5-10k per session? i can go to like 20k if the session is once a month.
TLDR : dad SA'ed me for years upon years, i finally filed a case (when i was 17) against my dad, had to take it back cause of financial pressure. i turned 18 on 5th of august and have a court date where i want to tell the truth. trustworthy lawyer needed.