u/dagmar_7

hi everyone

i've been lurking on this sub about a year and a half & felt the need to post for some reason.

this community means the world to me, it's gotten me thru my darkest moments & reading what each of u so generously share about your personal lives relaxes & comforts me enough to sleep on nights i otherwise might not be able to.

this disease is fucking intense, i commend each and every one of u for getting up each day. alcoholics don't receive nearly enough compassion. i barely hold myself back from going off the deep end, to the basement of rock bottom. this disease has taken a lot from me. i know deep down i'll always be an alcoholic, nothing else i've ever done or will do will suffice, just alcohol. even when im disgusted by it im compelled to drink myself into oblivion. i've gotten myself into really scary situations and as much as it saddens me i cant see myself ever breaking out of my pattern of self destruction.

anyway. thank you again.