My mother had uninvited herself from my wedding.
Some context - my mother and father separated when I was 10 after a very toxic marriage (honestly it should've been done sooner). My mother has some undiagnosed mental health disorders and what I now figure to be narcissistic tendencies. Start of 2025 she had caused major drama the day before my engagement party to which she - again - said she wasn't coming to. During the planning of the engagement party she was up and down about how she felt about my dad coming to the event since he hasn't lived in the state for a good 10/11 years now and they've only interacted in person once or twice in that time period. After she caused the major drama in front of my fiance and I, which she was hysterically crying, on the floor, fetal position and shaking then begging for forgiveness she ended up coming to the event. My fiance and I ended up hating the party and just wanted it to be done so badly.
Afterwards we promised ourselves we would not allow her to have any responsibility in the wedding which included not helping out financially. During our wedding planning she managed to wear us down into allowing her to invite some friends which she would pay for. Which turned into inviting 60 people, then turned into her paying for half of my guests because "how dare I even suggest she shouldn't do something like that for her only daughter". The way we thought it was fair to split the payment would be based on percentage of guests within the wedding. Everyone agreed at the time which meant that she had to pay for 80/190 guests.
A few weeks ago now (3 months from the wedding) my dad had to reduce his guest numbers as he would not be able to pay for his total (he isn't the most financially responsible person). We had discussed with my fiance and my mother what would happen if this were to occur. My mother had assured she would be able to make up the guest numbers as we have a minimum and maximum guest count of 200 at the venue and she wanted to invite more guests anyways. Her response was finalised with "you are my only child, all this money I make is for nothing if I can't spend it on you having your dream wedding".
Cut to me telling her dad had reduced his guest numbers to which she became hysterical. To her I was ungrateful, I was treating her like a bank, how could I assume she would do this for me. I replied with "I went to you because you expressed this was something you could've handled, I can ask my fiance to make up the guest numbers instead". I hung up the phone on her after she kept going on with various forms of whatever she had said previously. I called my grandmother on my fathers side and explained the situation to her. She had agreed it wasn't great that my dad did that and said she would cover the cost of those guests that he cut. I'm thinking, problem solved!.
I go to my mothers house to tell her this. Instead I'm met with "I don't want to talk to you ever again" and "I'm not coming to the wedding". When my fiance tried to explain to her that her saying these things could affect our relationship in the future she claimed "it's broken". So now I'm here, having to make up 60 guest numbers and figuring out financially how to not end up in debt. She has also been telling her family that I am the one who uninvited and they keep calling me to tell her to let her back into the wedding. When I tell them this isn't the case and what she had actually said I get a "well what did you do for her to say that?". This wedding process has been ruined for me. I want this nightmare to be over.