Can OCD make you completely believe a nightmare and convince you that you were abused? (False Memory OCD?)
Hey everyone,
I'm struggling really hard right now and I need to know if anyone else has experienced this with OCD.
About a year ago, I went to get a tantric massage. I really wanted to experience it, and during the session, the masseur lay on top of me and there was some kind of sexual context/connection. Right after it happened, I went home and I felt completely fine. Normal.
But later on, I had a massive, terrifying nightmare about this guy. In the nightmare, he was sucking the energy out of me, and l also dreamed that he abused me.
Ever since that dream, my OCD took over. I started overthinking and spiraling out of control. I fully believed my thoughts and the nightmare. It got so bad that I started feeling incredibly "dirty" and filled with intense shame about the whole experience.
My mind kept spiraling, and I was convinced that I will always see the shadow from that nightmare surrounding me. It has completely ruined my view of intimacy-| felt like I could never have sex, kiss, or touch anyone ever again because it will always trigger memories of that nightmare. I feel better now but it really took me some good months to stop having that idea that I was abused..
Is it normal for OCD to make you so spun up that you fully buy into the idea that you were abused? The nightmare felt so real that my brain twisted reality, and now I'm genuinely convinced and terrified that I was abused, even though I felt fine initially. Has anyone else dealt with their brain completely rewriting a memory based on a dream and anxiety?
Thanks for reading.