u/erttheking

The owner of my local store was running a Draw Steel one shot, something I'm all about. It's an open game, first come first serve. The day of, at the last second, a person I've had problems with in the past joins. This is a person I've had to leave a campaign because of in the past. Long story short, I tried to talk to them in that game about how them using dehumanizing language to justify killing prisoners made me uncomfortable. And they didn't even look me in the eye. I later learned I wasn't the only player who left that campaign because of them. I figure it's only a one shot and I want to play Draw Steel so badly I figure I can tough it out and reason that if they're being rude, I can call it out in the moment

For the majority of people playing, this is the first time they've played Draw Steel, the GM even flat out saying they're ok with being corrected. I've run once before and I've spent a lot of time researching so I spend a lot of time flipping back and forth in my rulebook. Problem player cites a rule I had previously gotten wrong, I go to check it. They make a comment about "Page x for the person about to correct me."

That didn't sit well with me. At the end of the game I said I thought that was rude and asked them to not do it again. They say absolutely. I untense. Problem solved through communicating like adults, right? Wrong. Next word out of their mouth is However

They accuse me of being judgmental, that they don't approve, and that they think I've ranted at them multiple times. I don't know what the fuck they're on about. I might speak quickly when bringing up problems at a table due to the old fight or flight kicking in because I get nervous about social confrontations, but my voice is level, my tone neutral, and my language polite. And they agree to my request even though it's judgmental? I don't understand what's going on there beyond some "I want to be seen as polite, but I dislike you still and want to make that known" contradiction of motives?

I talked to the DM after this after the DM broke up the argument, telling them that frankly I just don't want to play at the same table as problem player anymore. The DM confided that I'm not the only person having problems with them regarding that session and they promised they'd handle it

I think my DM handled this well and I'm committed to avoiding problem player now. I just find myself baffled and frustrated that "hey, please don't speak to me like that" can be considered judgmental ranting. Typing this out just helped me get the frustration out of my system