6 months post second transplant
Hello (M29) long time lurker of the page. I was diagnosed in November 2023 very suddenly when I thought I just had a cold. I generally come to the page to try and quell some anxieties around this whole process.
In the first diagnosed I did a consolidation treatment very aggressive but went into the transplant still with minimal detection and had nearly two good years out of the transplant. I did have a whole host of GVHD mostly physical symptoms like cramping and fatigue. On the second transplant I did an even more aggressive consolidation and sprung for TBI. Going into the transplant with completely zero detection.
I guess now not to my surprise I relapsed in September 2025 and had my second transplant in February. After the first transplant even with the chronic GVHD I felt invincible like I could conquer anything until I got the gut put on a random cbc panel.
I’m posting really looking for any guidance on how to navigate anxiety. For what it’s worth I’m extremely fit to most surprise after the transplant doing lots of weightlifting six days a week a lot of hiking and cycling as well. I just absolutely never feel like it’s enough. Regardless of if I’m eating good, lifting heavy, recovering well, and symptomless. The second I get a stuffy nose or my throat is a little sore or I feel like I need to take a nap it sends me into a complete panic waiting for the other shoe to drop. I keep myself busy almost all of the time to avoid managing the mental load or feeling like I’m going to miss out. I just feel like I’m not living in my body. Any suggestions would be helpful thank you.