AITA for telling someone to mind her own business after she gave me unsolicited advice after my divorce?
I, F33, separated from my husband a few months ago. It was a hard decision but I'm really glad I did it and I've been thriving ever since. I tried for years to fix it, and the relationship was over in my mind for a long time before I was in a position where I could end it and support myself on my own. I basically grieved my marriage while I was still in it, was in therapy and all that, and still am in therapy just to do routine mental health care. And I am doing pretty well all things considered.
I am taking time to try new things, spend time alone, etc, but I also was missing out on so much during my marriage that I like going on dates and exploring new people. I'm not particularly broadcasting that because it's no one's business.
Some info about my boss, we'll call her T. She is a big time mother hen. Always in everyone's business, always inserting herself and asking personal and unnecessary questions.
Anyway, I was having lunch with T the other day and she asked how I was adjusting with my divorce. I said I'm actually doing really well and I'm really happy. She nods and proceeds to tell me how "happy she is for making this choice and deciding to be single for a few years." Mind you, I have never mentioned anything about that. In fact, I have barely talked to her about it in general.
So I kind of laugh off her statement and said "Well I certainly won't be doing THAT but it is nice to be able to focus on just myself."
She looks at me all concerned and confused, and goes on to say how its important for me to figure out how to be independent and not need a man. I'm now getting a little frustrated because I have always been pretty independent and have been paying my own bills and almost all of the house bills for the past decade. I don't rely on anyone for anything. I explain all of this to her and she still insists I should not get involved with any men for a "minimum of three years" and that I "will probably just prefer never dating anyone again anyway."
I try to keep my composure and explain that I appreciate her intentions, but that I'm going to do whatever I think is best for me and explore my life as I see fit. She gives me a look and says "Well, clearly you need some guidance because at one point you thought marrying your ex was what was best for you."
That's when I lost it. I stood up and told her to mind her business, stop treating me like a child, and to keep her outdated and rude advice to herself because I never asked for it.
I didn't talk to her for the rest of the day and fortunately worked from home the day after. The next time I was back in office, I found out she had told all of this to some of the other older women in the office who all felt the need to take her side and start harassing me about "respecting myself and staying single" for a long time. Then told me I owed T an apology for my reaction to her.
I was so mad that I just told them it wasn't any of their business and closed my office door. AITA for my reaction?