Feeling super guilty and shameful for totaling two of my dad's cars in the last 4 months.
In my honest opinion I am a defensive and safe driver. I don't drive recklessly and rarely speed more than 5-6 over the speed limit. I try to keep a safe distance between the cars in front of me, and usually am the one who ends up honking at others when I feel I'm being put in an unsafe situation. I am aware that two at-fault accidents don't do much to back up these claims which is why I'm looking for some support and words of encouragement.
My first wreck I went off the side of the road after falling asleep behind the wheel. I had woken up 20 minutes prior and was rushing to get myself ready and to work in time, and I guess had not allowed myself enough time to fully wake up before hopping in the car. I don't remember much from that drive besides opening my eyes and being in a ditch. Car totaled.
My second wreck happened last night. The car in front of me slammed on their brakes to make a turn and I slammed on mine in return, which only resulted in my brakes locking up and me sliding right into their rear end despite my best efforts. Totaled again.
I feel extremely guilty and am starting to doubt my own abilities on the road. I've always trusted myself and my passengers have trusted me too but I don't feel so deserving of that trust after getting into two at-fault accidents in a 4 month span and totaling both vehicles. My girlfriend has tried reassuring me that they were both "accidents" as the name suggests and that she still feels safe in my passenger seat. My parents are starting to doubt my defensiveness on the road. I just don't know where to go from here and if I should just give up on the idea of driving ever again as I don't want anything else to happen, especially to cars that I haven't paid off and still owe money for. I'm not sure the point of this post I just needed to let off some of these feelings and thoughts in writing somewhere.