“parang hindi nurse”
That’s what my senior nurse said to me and I honestly haven’t stopped thinking about it since.
For context, I was supposed to give my patient a bed bath. But the patient was already getting agitated, saying it was cold and asking me to just do it tomorrow. I tried encouraging her and explained she might feel better after, but she kept refusing and was getting more irritated.
So instead of forcing it, I still tried to provide care within what she could tolerate. I changed the linens, cleaned her hands, feet, and perineal area with wipes, changed her diaper and underpad, and made him more comfortable overall.
Later my senior asked if I gave the bed bath and when I said no because the patient was cold and refusing, she said: “parang hindi nurse.”
I didn’t even know how to react. I just froze. Did I miss something? Did I handle it wrong? Was I supposed to force the patient? Am I too soft for bedside nursing?
I know I still have a lot to learn, but that comment really hit me harder than I expected.
After that interaction, I kept asking myself: is bedside nursing really like this? Do I just have to swallow comments like these and get used to them?
Because honestly, ayoko. Ayokong masanay na normal lang mangpahiya, mangliit, or make someone feel incompetent over one situation. I know I’m new. I know I still have so much to learn. I’m open to correction. But there’s a difference between teaching and making someone feel small.
I don’t know. Maybe I’m too sensitive. Maybe this is just reality in bedside nursing. But right now, I just feel tired.