Anyone else struggle more the closer they get to their due date?
So we have had 2 pregnancy losses. Our first was at 8 weeks, and our second was our son who we lost at 33w3d in late June last year. We just barely passed our son’s first birthday and now I am 36w4d with our daughter (due for induction on July 11th.)
I thought I would feel better once I got past the gestation I had lost my son and after his first birthday, but I honestly feel worse. I can’t shake the anxiety that this birth will end the same. I’ve had weekly NST’s and monthly growth scans, everything is looking fine. I mean aside from the fact that her head is below the first percentile, but they’ve told us not to worry because all of her brain content is there.
I am so worried she will die these last few days in utero or I’ll have a traumatic birth that results in her dying or having a brain injury. I obsess constantly over her movements and frequently look back at her old scan reports to see if I’ve missed something. How do I shake this? I don’t want to keep living in this anxiety for the last 2 weeks of pregnancy.