r/pregnancyaftersb

Hello ladies,

At what stage of a next pregnancy did you decide to see midwife or obgyn after full term stillbirth?

I had full term sb at 38 weeks just a few months ago and I just found out I'm pregnant and only 4 weeks.

So I am wondering is it better to wait till 10-12 weeks to avoid any stress to go back to the same building. Last pregnancy they did my first ultrasound at 9 weeks anyway.

Daily chat to discuss anything related to pregnancy after loss.

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Last week I gave birth to my beautiful, living, perfect baby boy Junius.

I lost my first baby, my son River, at just under 30 weeks in March 2025. When he died I had pre-eclampsia with severe features, and my placenta pathology gave me a diagnosis of chronic histiocytic intervillositis. Last spring and summer I felt so much heartache and fear that these diagnoses would make it impossible for me to have a live birth. I am sure everyone in this group understands that uncertainty and grief.

Now that we are on the other side, I am so grateful to be able to say that I had a healthy pregnancy, and the treatment plan that we chose with my doctors was successful (or maybe we just got lucky this time).

We had planned an induction at 37+1, but J made other plans and flipped to a breech position shortly before we started the induction process. So, we had a c section instead! When I heard the doctor announce that she was pull baby's head out, and then when she showed me and my husband our breathing, grunting baby, we both started crying and it was the most beautiful moment.

In the days since giving birth, it's been an emotional learning curve. Before birth, I expected constant newborn bliss. I knew that was naive, but I still believed it. Being postpartum and learning how to breastfeed is still hard work! So now I'm trying to be gentle with myself and to have lower expectations about how I should be feeling. I still grieve for my baby boy River. But there is so much joy in learning who his little brother is, and anticipating who he will be.

Thanks everyone who was so supportive to me on this group. This was a really supportive and helpful online community. The reality of life and pregnancy after stillbirth is so hard. Wishing you all peace and hope, wherever you are in the process.

Hello friends, I am pregnant for the third time (6 weeks and 3 days very early) after a 20 week stillbirth last June, and a blighted ovum miscarriage this March. I have had betas drawn and they’re looking nice, I also had an early ultrasound on Tuesday at exactly 6 weeks. Little thing was there, measuring two days ahead and a nice heart rate of 117. That was reassuring. I’ve however started to have a lot of anxiety and really almost start spiraling because I’m so nervous. I haven’t had a ton of symptoms (yet), other than being very tired, increased hunger, and some boob pain, but the boob pain has stopped completely all of a sudden and I’m convinced this means something bad is happening despite having a reassuring visit on Tuesday. How do you cope with nervousness and anxiety? It is really unbearable for me, and I feel like I’m constantly waiting for something bad to happen, because well, it has twice so far. I’m really hoping this works out and this baby makes it earth side - but I’m really struggling badly. Any advice is welcome 🙏

If you are a non-pregnant person who has had a stillbirth or neonatal death and have questions for our pregnant members, please post them here.

So we have had 2 pregnancy losses. Our first was at 8 weeks, and our second was our son who we lost at 33w3d in late June last year. We just barely passed our son’s first birthday and now I am 36w4d with our daughter (due for induction on July 11th.)

I thought I would feel better once I got past the gestation I had lost my son and after his first birthday, but I honestly feel worse. I can’t shake the anxiety that this birth will end the same. I’ve had weekly NST’s and monthly growth scans, everything is looking fine. I mean aside from the fact that her head is below the first percentile, but they’ve told us not to worry because all of her brain content is there.

I am so worried she will die these last few days in utero or I’ll have a traumatic birth that results in her dying or having a brain injury. I obsess constantly over her movements and frequently look back at her old scan reports to see if I’ve missed something. How do I shake this? I don’t want to keep living in this anxiety for the last 2 weeks of pregnancy.

My second daughter was still born at 37w and 2d 9/16/25. Today was my third beta draw and it was a 3.5 increase from my 2nd. Today was the first day I finally accepted I am pregnant, this week at least. Holding my breath until our early US next week 🥹🤞🏻

Hi all,

I’m in week 7 of pregnancy, we were lucky enough to see baby’s heartbeat this week which we are so grateful for. I was hoping it would bring comfort , but it’s actually brought more confusion and anxiety.

I lost my baby girl after 36 hours due to a very rare form of Leukemia that was not known about until after she was born (at 39 weeks). We lost our daughter in November.

This pregnancy is obviously very different to my previous two . I feel grateful, anxious, guilty, sad and everything in between . My brain won’t allow excitement (which in turn makes me guilty) and it certainly won’t allow me to foresee a healthy baby at the end of all this .

It’s also lonely . I can’t relate to other people who are pregnant around me as I sadly don’t share the same naivety that everything is going to be ok. I don’t feel like my midwife understands either. Going into midwife appointments, and especially hospital where we had our first ultrasound brought back all the trauma.

Has anyone any advice on how to cope ? I’m incredibly lucky to have a LC who is a 2 year old whirlwind and keeps me occupied. But when he’s napping or in bed my brain immediately goes to negative thoughts.

Wishing everyone here a peaceful, healthy pregnancy.

A little back story: the doctor that delivered my son was incredible. He was just the random doctor that happened to be on call when I found out that there was no heartbeat. I had my c-section the same day. It was such a mercy to have a doctor that was so sensitive to my situation and great at clearly explaining everything. I would love to go back to him, but at my 6 week pp appointment he told me that he was moving and switching to a hospital that is almost an hour away. I was crushed. I can't make that work.

The OB that did all of my clinic appointments is still there, but... idk.. I can't go to her. She was fine, but I just can't face her.

How do I find a new OB? I have an appointment with a nurse practitioner at a new clinic near me to try to feel out the place. What do I ask to find the right doctor? Is there a way to feel out if a doctor will be sensitive to stillbirth before seeing them?

My first time around, I went to a few different OBs before I picked one, but I wouldn't want to have to do that again.

For context, I had a stillbirth at 38 weeks back in February. I am now 8 weeks pregnant and I am considering whether I should go to a private clinique for ultrasounds. I am in Canada where we have free public health care. Our private sector where I live cost about 200$ per ultrasound. I am just wondering whether you have experienced a better service in one or the other. I think I am just wondering whether there's more tests or better quality services or if there is not difference. Thank you!

I lost my last pregnancy just shy of 28w, and my EDD for this pregnancy was 7/6 which is the anniversary of the loss.

I started the induction process for VBAC yesterday morning. My hospital doesnt allow you to eat after they start it, so it was a very very long 29 hours. We did a catheter balloon to get started which was effective enough to be removed immediately. However, I was not really progressing after that regardless of getting me to max pitocin levels over night. Baby girl did move down to my cervix so we were able to proceed with breaking my water at 3am and we restarted pitocin at half the dose I got up to with very gradual increase. Then very little progression again until about 1pm. I was comfortable and contractions were minor the entire time. Really only complaint was being hungry because nearly hourly popsicles weren't really cutting it lol

Around 1pm, contractions amped up and suddenly I was fully dilated. It took an hour and a half of pushing in several different positions to deliver. She had been measuring at about 75th percentile at my growth Ultrasounds, but she turned out to be over 90th at birth 😵‍💫 I was super nervous and feeling guilty for opting to deliver as early as I did instead of at least pushing to 39th or 40th week, but considering what her size turned out to be I'm now incredibly thankful. Because, ouch. It was hard work and very emotional, but I am so so thrilled she is here!!

A huge thanks to the mods and everyone in this community for giving a safe space to vent all the gnarly feelings and painful situations that come up during PAL. I can't express how grateful I am to all of you. I hope your pregnancy and delivery journeys are smooth as they can possibly be!! 💜

I had a full term stillbirth last year. I spoke to MFM in a bigger city during the postpartum period as they were doing tests to see if they could find out what happened. There is one MFM doctor in my city so the big city doc spoke with her to see if she would take me on as a patient once I become pregnant again, and she said yes.

Well I did become pregnant and I had my fertility doctor send in the referral very soon into the pregnancy. It has now been 5 weeks since the referral was sent and I still haven't heard anything. Unfortunately I had a miscarriage this week but I would have been 10 weeks pregnant and still nothing from MFM. This frustrates me because there are potential treatment options I was told about that would have been implemented earlier into the pregnancy. I have no phone number or email or way of contacting the office here locally. Does anyone have any tips? Or has anyone experienced something like this before?

Daily chat to discuss anything related to pregnancy after loss.

You can also set your flair to show your due date and pregnancy history. You can do this by tapping the three dots (on mobile), and then selecting “change user flair.” Please ask a mod if you need help doing this. ❤️

I am so sorry from the bottom of my heart that we are in this group . There is LITERALLY NOTHING worse than losing a child. I am 8 months pp. i ache for my baby girl and our planned future .

I have two lc already so I know how lucky I am . But I want to try again. Does that make me crazy? I am almost 36. I die everyday just looking at my body & wishing I had my baby girl who was inside of me for safe 9’months.

I am terrified of going through this again. Can anyone please share any positive stories if anyone has had a successful birth of a lc after a stillbirth ? Especially considering my age already ?

Peace and blessings to all you mommies and daddies . I pray our babies are all safe and happy and continue looking down on us and give us strength . Big hugs to all.

Daily chat to discuss anything related to pregnancy after loss.

You can also set your flair to show your due date and pregnancy history. You can do this by tapping the three dots (on mobile), and then selecting “change user flair.” Please ask a mod if you need help doing this. ❤️