Am I getting rejected from jobs because I'm trans?
I feel like I'm losing my mind a little bit. I'm a big, 30 yo non-binary butch. I've been looking for a job for 6 months, and I keep getting to the last round of interviews and then getting rejected.
I've only been able to get feedback from one organization, and they told me they appreciated how "genuine" I was, and that there were really just the tiniest differences between me and the other person. I don't know if they meant it this way, but "genuine" landed for me as code for you're trans and gay and that's obvious to us.
I'm obviously qualified for these positions because I keep getting interviews. I never disclose my birth name or gender on my applications, but then I get into interviews where people are trying to be "inclusive" and ask for pronouns and it feels really uncomfortable to lie and not say they/them. I know the job market is BAD right now, and there are a million reasons why someone would hire another candidate.
But I'm worried that, if it keeps coming down to essentially splitting hairs because so many qualified people are applying, no one's ever going to choose me over a cisgender candidate. It felt like that was part of my most recent rejection -- that they had concerns about me being a public-facing part of their team. Maybe I'm just spiraling, but it's starting to feel like a pattern. Has anyone else dealt with something like this? Should I lie about my pronouns in interviews? Or am I being dramatic, and these rejections have nothing to do with me being trans? Any advice or outside perspective would be much appreciated.