u/itsaliveasshole

I have such extreme anxiety sometimes that I almost HAVE TO stay away from the public and hode in the woods all day. I am out of edibles, alcohol, and weed too which makes it all that more difficult... I am in the situation that I can have a replacement ID mailed and itll at least be safe with the homeowner until I can grab it. Does anyone know if there any charities in NC that will help with rebuying one for me?

Im flat broke and havent been doing too great with flying or spanging which kinda sucks! I figured with the weather being this hot people may have more of a heart. I am looking for work again now that Im here, but I havent heard anything back from anywhere so I remain hopeful something happens soon! I feel so downtrodden today, it is my daughters birthday and I couldnt send her anything, not even a card. She knows I love her at least... I really wanted to get back up north to her to surprise her soon, as since shes really upset that I had to leave to begin with...

I am having a stretch of what feels like constant misfortune. I had JUST got my ebt card back for 6mths and thought I was going to eat good the first time in a good while, only for my entire wallet to be completely missing! I ordered a new EBT, but I have to wait around for it to come. Days with all this anxiety make me want to leave where I am immediately. I just wish I could be a better parent. I didnt expect to be sobbing by time I was done with this post but I guess I need it or I wouldnt be feeling like this...

Anyway, widh me luck on dinner. I was hoping I could get a new ID ordered before I depart again. Seems like maybe I should just keep rolling. I am heartbreak traveling to begin with this time so... I hope I can find something to eat without directly facing the public this evening. Its beautiful outside and the temps should start to fall for the rest of the night. A joint or a beer wkuld be of much help right now. Guess i have to weigh my options and bite the bullet if I wanna get either.. smh.

Sorry if this was a depressing post. Thanks to all my peeps in this sub who live this way too and understand. Also, tysm of you have any info on a charity that will help me get a replacent ID! Mine is not a NC id so i cant just go in and get one, I have to order mine online and have it sent here which makes things a bit stickier.

All my fellow travelers. Much love. Hang in here with me!

So, I left southern PA about 3 days ago now, heading through WV, and trying to get to NC alive to visit a friend and rest up at their home for about a week before I head up to Maine for the rest of the summer, if all works out.

My current issue is that I'm doing very poorly with my signs and spanging. I think its possibly due to being in a poor area to start with? I worked and saved almost all yr last year, but my daughter had an emergency and I gave her the rest of everything I earned and had saved to help her out. So now, Im not doing well here at all, and it is ungodly hot outside! I am trying to get something to eat and to have some money for water in my pocket, if nothing else... Maybe I'm just getting too old to conti ue this life much longer, but at the same time , if I am being reasonable I cannot see myself staying put in one place for very long no matter how old I get.

I am trying my hardest to get into NC in time for a job opportunity because thinks are bleak right now, perhaps it has to do with being pretty hungry now. It might also have to do with being heartbroken at the moment as well. Its hard to take care of ones daily needs when youre hurting. I feel like the farther I get from where I was, the less painful what I am going through will be. Idk. Lets hope I can get back to my baseline laid back, positive thinking self sooner than later.

I just feel lonely and unwanted by everyone. My depression is untreated and kicking my ass hard. Its been days that when I speak to someone and they ignore me completely. Im getting even more depressed at being treated as if I am "less than" or "unimportant and unseen", even when asking a general question from someone. I am a woman, and I stay looking clean and housed for my own safety if nothing else, so its not like I am to be avoided due to fear or health risk. Also, I am USED TO IT, as are the rest of us travelers, so I am pretty sure me being overly emotional has to do with some of the recent hurt I am experiencing along with not eating enough or drinking enough in this heat.

Today is one of those days I wish I could get out of this heat, relax, eat, take a shower, etc... sort of like a housed person on their day off work. This girl is ready to throw in the proverbial towel. I don't know what to do with myself. My mental and physical state mixed have me in a risky state. I am trying to remain extremely self-aware, as I do not want to fall into a relapse/do something dangerous/hurt myself purposefully on a whim, due to being in a bad way....

The BIGGEST woe I am facing is that my solar battery pack may be one of the most convinient, and nicest items that I apparently USED TO OWN, and it being missing has slowed my travels a ton by having to scout out a plug somewhere and sit there for a few hrs to charge. I didnt miss sitting in a Mcdonalds for hrs hoping the staff wont kick you out necause you have no money to buy anything but you need a charge really bad! 😂

Being that it is SOOO HOT, I have been getting to the library around this time everyday while it is dangerous to be outside too long, and to charge up. I will say, this heat is not the worst I've experienced, but I' m in a rough spot without the sustenance I need at the moment, but its much better than what I dealt with last winter whilst working up in Akron, OH. Being outside at that time was scary a few times last winter!

Safe travels to my fellow vagabonds out there! Stay safe, and stay fed/hydrated!!