u/janacuddles

I know that 35 ages you out, but I am 31 and still working on my degree. Short version is that I decided to switch careers a couple years ago and got back in school. I'm double majoring in History and Classics with my original goal being to do alternate certification to be a history teacher. But I always dreamed of living in France and found out about the TAPIF program recently and am now wondering if I could use it to eventually be able to teach in France and move there. I'm not picky about what I teach so I'm fine if I end up only teaching English forever as long as it's in France, but I am concerned about my age and how doable this is.

So important context, I have abandonment trauma largely because my ex-wife left while I was at dinner with friends. I am very open about how this event affected me.
My fiancée of 6 years just left while I was working my night shift, so I came home to her car being gone and a note left by the door. She says that she needs to go back to her family so she can work on herself because she's been hurting me too much. Also says that she didn't feel like she could talk to me about it because I have too much trauma, and asks me to trust her that we aren't done with each other yet. She also leaves this turtle magnet that symbolizes her home.
Well that note is all I have for two weeks, then we finally talk on the phone. She has this obviously rehearsed spiel about how she can't work on herself within a relationship and that she's not coming back. But she says to hold onto the turtle and she'll come back for it someday.
But basically I feel like she ran out the door and expects me to hold it open for her for an indefinite amount of time while she goes off to work on herself. No interest in working on herself together because it would be "inauthentic." I'm just so sick of this bullshit. This is not the first major breach of my trust from her, but it is the most significant. Literally what was the point in putting me back together after my divorce if she was just going to shatter me into a million pieces again?