u/joemama_jj

I’ve been hardstuck s2 for almost a year and a half. I just can’t get out from s2(idk why prob skill issue ig). For the last few weeks my mmr skyrocketed and was getting queued up again gold and even some plat asw(was solo queuing btw). But even though they are gold or plat they ain’t no different. Even yesterday i only needed 6rr to s3 and guess what brain dead teammates and enemies who haven’t seen sun in a decade. And i started losing more and i got hella tilted and i was tired and frustrated i even lowk started throwing my last game and rage deleted it after that. However i still need someone to carry me to gold. Xd (Singapore server)

Before i start ts might be really cringe and there might be lots of holes cause i’m not good at story telling. And just don’t mind my english

18m here and ts happened to me three years ago so i was 15 back then( was bout to turn 15 in few months)

So at that time i was w a girl (she’s also same age as me) and it had been a year together.

Talking bout her, she’s been my crush for years before we got into that relationship. I didn’t see red flags back then but after i broke up w her (it’s been 2 years since i broke up w her) I realized that she was lil controlling and was overly obsessive. Which ig not tha big of a deal.

Like i said ts shi happened when i was 15 and we were almost into a 1 year relationship at that time. And things started to become lil sexual between us.

Since we didn’t go to same school we could only see each other at two days a week. So most of the things happened over texts.

How all these started was, one day she suddenly said she need a kiss next Saturday when we gon meet and i was hella excited. (We both came from a religious household so that’s probably the reason we didn’t do any shit for over a year) Since she was the first girl i dated (i ain’t got no experience in kissing i even watch youtube videos how to kiss properly T-T) so yeah just like she asked for i delivered what see needed. And after that all the feelings that i’ve been holding for a year came flooding once. But i was scared to take my shot cause i didn’t wanna lose her. So i started things slowly like sending her reels and stuff. However she asked me what i really wanna do (i was never thinking of having sex at that time) so i said tits. And I thought she gon be hella mad or some but to my surprise she said she also wanna be more open and she likes to do sm crazy stuff asw. So yeah we were just all over that topic for hours, even tho i tried change the topic she didn’t want to so i was like hell yeah. But next day I texted her and her reply was do not bring up what we talked bout yesterday day and she was ashamed of her self. Even tho i had no clue tf’s going on i couldn’t do much about that. So few weeks passed by and we were already on that topic again and some later i was touching her tits and she was flashing me ‘em face time. But ts was only for few days. And then she goes again saying don’t bring that stuff and all those bs bout saying she’s ashamed of herself doing all that. I didn’t think that was much of deal cause she was like acting that before and I didn’t stop doing what i was doing. And somehow she started saying no when imma grab her tits and i respect her and didn’t do shit. And things started to go as usual and one what she suddenly texted me saying she gotta talk about something and i knew i’m fucked( I didn’t know it’d be ts bad). She started saying she didn’t like any of ts and she said that I’ve become some one else and she feels like that I’m being weird influenced by some one and she feels like I’m using her and she’s been crying for weeks and whole lot shi like that (which i had no clue wtf was happening). She wanted break up w me but i begged her not to and apologize over and over and told her i’d do as she say and somehow she didn’t break up w. After that i felt really wronged and i was disgusted in myself so i started apologize to her again but she just dismissed that saying she doesn’t wanna talk about it. Somehow she was really cold towards me for days and i felt like she’s setting a boundary between us. So i felt more wronged and disgusted and eventually i lose feelings towards not only her but everyone and also fell into depression phase asw. But i didn’t wanna end things cause i didn’t make her upset. So i held on for another year. And yeah i ended things after a year cause i was drowning in so much pressured. I told only her that i don’t have feelings for her but didn’t tell her why all that happened. But she said she don’t wanna lose me and started texting me like crazy and also contacting my friends asw. Even ts year she texted me asking if i have a gf now. After that break up i fell down even more, i was in a lil depression phase and build up social anxiety asw(which was severe up to a certain point) which took me like 8months to heal. After that i told my friends what happened and they said i didn’t do anything wrong and it was her fault all along and pointing out she needed that asw. But still i think that i’m at the wrong.

I am i really the bad guy here???