Wish I cashed out
for context, I am a cocaine addict. I’m sober for about 45 days. Don’t have any money im 22. Live in halfway housing. Go to my parents house to eat every day. Selling Coke to make a little money.
With my last $50 I loaded it up to “Rebet”
Playing with some blackjack doing side bets specifically bust and hot 3. I got my hundred dollars up to $230 and then I started betting big because well shit I got it up to this point you know I basically I’m playing with house money.
Got her down to 30 at one point back to 120 down to my last 15 back up to 80. Then I lost it all.
The guilt and shame is fucking killing me. I just can’t do anything right in my life and I’m doing something so fucking stupid. It’s just like unbelievably shameful. Just wanted to share my experience and I don’t know. I just really fucking feel like shit right now. Hopefully better days move forward. I deleted the app too.