Hello there,
I have finally did it. After 7+ years of everyday gambling/trading with a total lost of nearly 400,000+/- EUROS (with the winnings from the operators) and around 200K deposits I finally did it. I have ended this nightmare. Keep pushing guys. It gets better, life is not only gambling. Life is what you make it. Make it better.
This is not the usual gambling story you will see because usually its the men who’s have such issues. So here it goes…
I (28F) have a gambling addiction. It all started last pandemic when slots and casinos went online here in the Philippines because of my environment. My lolo, tito and cousin was a gambler.
Early 2024 - At first it was only the coin with bombs, then I was introduced to a site by my boyfriend’s friend then I played bingo plus. That time I lost around 100k and I was able to stop and control myself. I told my boyfriend about this he said “No one really wins sa gambling - glad you stopped” and for months I was sober.
Here comes March 2025, the vloggers I was following had some contents about gambling and how they are winning - there I caved in again. This is where the addiction truly started and deepen and rooted in my life. I started to bet 250 minimum and hit 65k win in Crazy time. I continued to play different EVO games and hit 300k win. I was able to got my losses back and even paid a debt to my brother I took because I need it for me and my boyfriend’s house. This time I told my boyfriend - he did not stopped me from playing. I gave my bank account with him with all my wins. I continued playing until I hit 1 Million pesos - it was around end of May 2025. ( I wish I stopped here but no - I didn’t). Only my boyfriend knew about my gambling and we were already planning where to spend it (mostly for our house renovations).
June 2025 - This is now the point where I started to lose little by little until my debt get close to 1 Million ( swiped credit cards) Similar with my winnings. I came clean to my boyfriend that I lost and since he was the one holding my money. This time he said an ultimatum that if I gamble again, he’ll break up with me. I then was able to pay off the bills using my winnings and my boyfriend told me to go therapy which I did. Still my family does not know anything at this point. Only my little sister who was back then a psychology student.
I was clean for almost 6 months. Until November hit when I tag along with my boyfriend’s christmas party in Okada and was left inside with the casino’s infront of me. He initially told me to just wait in the coffee shops outside but I insist to tag along. I thought I was healed and cured but no - I caved in again and played. I won 12k.
Told my boyfriend and he did not said anything.
Back then I thought “Ah okay lang pala”
For days after I tried so hard to fight back, but I caved in again. Downloaded the casinoplus app this time and played again and as the usual ending - I lost. This is when I started to hide from my boyfriend. But this time I came clean to my family. To my mother and brother who’s in United States.
They helped me pay some of my bills while I still pay as well. But I did not told my boyfriend - this is my mistake. I don’t want to tell him because I was afraid and I want to protect him and our relationship from my gambling problem. I don’t want to involve him. I said to myself I’ll tell him when its all over And I thought I was doing the right thing. I really thought it was. There were so many times I wanted to tell him but I couldn’t bring myself to talk. I was too afraid.
Turns out it was the worst decision I ever made. My relapses went on with smaller gaps this time, I relapsed again on April 2026 then just recently this July 2026. I am now on the rock bottom of my life. I have maxed out my cards, borrowed money from my friends and took loans on Online lending apps. I am fully addicted to this gambling.
There it hit me - I want to end the cycle. I can’t keep doing this anymore. I want to leave peacefully. I tried to analyze and think why do I kept relapsing - and there I realized it was because I am not being true to the people around me. I have an escape whenever I am with people who does not my situation.
So, I finally told my boyfriend. That I had relapsed since December and haven’t told him. He could not say anything at first, we did not talked for days and after 2 weeks he finally decided to leave me - just as I was fearing to happen. I begged. I kneeled. I cried. I told him its okay if he will get cold at me, if he won’t really be the same again, as long as he would stay because I really need him right now. I told him I am really decided to change this time, I have my recovery plan lined up. I really prayed he’ll hug me and tell me everything will be alright and he’ll be there for me. I am nothing but a good girlfriend - we barely fight. But still it ended this way all because of this stupid fucking gambling. Because I decided to hide instead of seeking his help. He said he tried so hard to think how can we we continue our relationship but he couldn’t bear the pain of my hiding and lying for thr past 8 months. I destroyed his trust. He still loves me so much but he just can’t bear the pain. His system’s not accepting it. We broke up in good terms. No hurtful words said. Just a sad, painful breakup.
And right then and there, my whole world collapsed. The person whom I thought will stand by me on the lowest point of my life walked away - and honestly I could not blame him. Who would want to stay with an addict anyway? Its just right he left because he should save himself.
The same day I told my boyfriend - I told my family that I relapsed again. They got so mad and I couldn’t blame them. I’m still lucky they don’t disown me at this point.
I eventually told my super close friends after.
I came clean to the people whose close to me and matters to me.
For days I couldn’t eat and sleep well. I am barely trying to live. I felt like a girl left in the middle of the dessert with no water and food. I have no will in my life to continue living. I just want everything to be finished. I almost already have the thought to just end it. But gladly, I was still able to pull myself back to the reality with the help of my family and friends. They’ve been very supportive and told me they believe in me that I could still create a new version of myself. They have so much faith in me that I don’t want to disappoint then. But deep in my heart - I’m still looking for him but he’s nowhere to be found.
Currently, I’m 20 days sober and 10 days since we broke up. I am on therapy. I don’t have access to my credit cards and banking apps (its all with my brother). I have limited allowance. My family and I have a plan how to pay off my debts. I have a huge backpay coming in from my previous work and I am currently earning 6 digits a month + my mom and brother will help financially. My family’s no longer super mad at me but they are very strict witj me and my finances. I am extremely thankful for them and tbh, I realized that everyone will leave you but your family will always be there for you. But don’t take them for granted - they have their own life and they should not be spending their life trying to fix your problem.
As for my 8 year relationship - Its only actually yesterday that I come at peace with the breaking up because I can’t seem to accept it at all. He was there when I was winning - and left me when I was losing. But soon enough I understand him, he said it was not the gambling that broke him, it was the hiding and lying part. He said if I told him sooner- he would’ve helped me. But I was too afraid. I thought not telling him was the right thing to protect him from my issues.
To anyone who’s reading this who just started gambling - STOP NOW - as early as you can. There is no such thing as “I can control it” - no you can’t. You will only truly win in life if you decide to stop and fight it.
Seek help.
Be honest and be open.
Tell your family.
Tell your closest friend.
Tell your partner.
To anyone with a similar situation - It is never too late to start again. We can still get our sparks back. Don’t wait until you lose everything before you decide to stop.
To the vloggers out there, hopefully this post will reach you. Stop promoting gambling - it can truly destroy people’s lives.
To Lord, thank you for giving me the strength to wake up each day. To fight this addiction. I know you won’t give this problem to me if I can’t get pass through it. I still believe you have better plans for me and I surrender everything to you.
To my family - I owe my life to you. Thank you for not giving up on me. Thank you for fighting this battle with me. I will be better and give back all the good things you’ve shown me.
To my ex-boyfriend, Thank you for the wonderful 8 years. I never regret spending it with you. I hope you heal from all the hurt. Its truly sad we have to end this way, but you are right to leave this relationship if its too painful for you already. Maybe someday, when we’re both healed - we’ll cross our paths again and continue our story. I’ll leave it to the universe and Lord to orchestrate it if its meant to happen.
To myself - Hopefully you can get your spark back as soon as possible and pay off your debts - and once you’re debt free - you can come back to this post to update everyone the success and be the example that its never too late to change. As long as you have the willpower to fight it and change - combine it with putting back the Lord into your life - you can be anything you wanted to be. You can live peacefully again.
To the readers - if you get to reach here, thank you for spending the time and hopefulky you’ll learn from my life story. If you’re not yet gambling - don’t ever start. Life is so much better without it.
✨🍃🌷🌸
This is not the usual gambling story you will see because usually its the men who’s have such issues. So here it goes…
I (28F) have a gambling addiction. It all started last pandemic when slots and casinos went online here in the Philippines because of my environment. My lolo, tito and cousin was a gambler.
Early 2024 - At first it was only the coin with bombs, then I was introduced to a site by my boyfriend’s friend then I played bingo plus. That time I lost around 100k and I was able to stop and control myself. I told my boyfriend about this he said “No one really wins sa gambling - glad you stopped” and for months I was sober.
Here comes March 2025, the vloggers I was following had some contents about gambling and how they are winning - there I caved in again. This is where the addiction truly started and deepen and rooted in my life. I started to bet 250 minimum and hit 65k win in Crazy time. I continued to play different EVO games and hit 300k win. I was able to got my losses back and even paid a debt to my brother I took because I need it for me and my boyfriend’s house. This time I told my boyfriend - he did not stopped me from playing. I gave my bank account with him with all my wins. I continued playing until I hit 1 Million pesos - it was around end of May 2025. ( I wish I stopped here but no - I didn’t). Only my boyfriend knew about my gambling and we were already planning where to spend it (mostly for our house renovations).
June 2025 - This is now the point where I started to lose little by little until my debt get close to 1 Million ( swiped credit cards) Similar with my winnings. I came clean to my boyfriend that I lost and since he was the one holding my money. This time he said an ultimatum that if I gamble again, he’ll break up with me. I then was able to pay off the bills using my winnings and my boyfriend told me to go therapy which I did. Still my family does not know anything at this point. Only my little sister who was back then a psychology student.
I was clean for almost 6 months. Until November hit when I tag along with my boyfriend’s christmas party in Okada and was left inside with the casino’s infront of me. He initially told me to just wait in the coffee shops outside but I insist to tag along. I thought I was healed and cured but no - I caved in again and played. I won 12k.
Told my boyfriend and he did not said anything.
Back then I thought “Ah okay lang pala”
For days after I tried so hard to fight back, but I caved in again. Downloaded the casinoplus app this time and played again and as the usual ending - I lost. This is when I started to hide from my boyfriend. But this time I came clean to my family. To my mother and brother who’s in United States.
They helped me pay some of my bills while I still pay as well. But I did not told my boyfriend - this is my mistake. I don’t want to tell him because I was afraid and I want to protect him and our relationship from my gambling problem. I don’t want to involve him. I said to myself I’ll tell him when its all over And I thought I was doing the right thing. I really thought it was. There were so many times I wanted to tell him but I couldn’t bring myself to talk. I was too afraid.
Turns out it was the worst decision I ever made. My relapses went on with smaller gaps this time, I relapsed again on April 2026 then just recently this July 2026. I am now on the rock bottom of my life. I have maxed out my cards, borrowed money from my friends and took loans on Online lending apps. I am fully addicted to this gambling.
There it hit me - I want to end the cycle. I can’t keep doing this anymore. I want to leave peacefully. I tried to analyze and think why do I kept relapsing - and there I realized it was because I am not being true to the people around me. I have an escape whenever I am with people who does not my situation.
So, I finally told my boyfriend. That I had relapsed since December and haven’t told him. He could not say anything at first, we did not talked for days and after 2 weeks he finally decided to leave me - just as I was fearing to happen. I begged. I kneeled. I cried. I told him its okay if he will get cold at me, if he won’t really be the same again, as long as he would stay because I really need him right now. I told him I am really decided to change this time, I have my recovery plan lined up. I really prayed he’ll hug me and tell me everything will be alright and he’ll be there for me. I am nothing but a good girlfriend - we barely fight. But still it ended this way all because of this stupid fucking gambling. Because I decided to hide instead of seeking his help. He said he tried so hard to think how can we we continue our relationship but he couldn’t bear the pain of my hiding and lying for thr past 8 months. I destroyed his trust. He still loves me so much but he just can’t bear the pain. His system’s not accepting it. We broke up in good terms. No hurtful words said. Just a sad, painful breakup.
And right then and there, my whole world collapsed. The person whom I thought will stand by me on the lowest point of my life walked away - and honestly I could not blame him. Who would want to stay with an addict anyway? Its just right he left because he should save himself.
The same day I told my boyfriend - I told my family that I relapsed again. They got so mad and I couldn’t blame them. I’m still lucky they don’t disown me at this point.
I eventually told my super close friends after.
I came clean to the people whose close to me and matters to me.
For days I couldn’t eat and sleep well. I am barely trying to live. I felt like a girl left in the middle of the dessert with no water and food. I have no will in my life to continue living. I just want everything to be finished. I almost already have the thought to just end it. But gladly, I was still able to pull myself back to the reality with the help of my family and friends. They’ve been very supportive and told me they believe in me that I could still create a new version of myself. They have so much faith in me that I don’t want to disappoint then. But deep in my heart - I’m still looking for him but he’s nowhere to be found.
Currently, I’m 20 days sober and 10 days since we broke up. I am on therapy. I don’t have access to my credit cards and banking apps (its all with my brother). I have limited allowance. My family and I have a plan how to pay off my debts. I have a huge backpay coming in from my previous work and I am currently earning 6 digits a month + my mom and brother will help financially. My family’s no longer super mad at me but they are very strict witj me and my finances. I am extremely thankful for them and tbh, I realized that everyone will leave you but your family will always be there for you. But don’t take them for granted - they have their own life and they should not be spending their life trying to fix your problem.
As for my 8 year relationship - Its only actually yesterday that I come at peace with the breaking up because I can’t seem to accept it at all. He was there when I was winning - and left me when I was losing. But soon enough I understand him, he said it was not the gambling that broke him, it was the hiding and lying part. He said if I told him sooner- he would’ve helped me. But I was too afraid. I thought not telling him was the right thing to protect him from my issues.
To anyone who’s reading this who just started gambling - STOP NOW - as early as you can. There is no such thing as “I can control it” - no you can’t. You will only truly win in life if you decide to stop and fight it.
Seek help.
Be honest and be open.
Tell your family.
Tell your closest friend.
Tell your partner.
To anyone with a similar situation - It is never too late to start again. We can still get our sparks back. Don’t wait until you lose everything before you decide to stop.
To the vloggers out there, hopefully this post will reach you. Stop promoting gambling - it can truly destroy people’s lives.
To Lord, thank you for giving me the strength to wake up each day. To fight this addiction. I know you won’t give this problem to me if I can’t get pass through it. I still believe you have better plans for me and I surrender everything to you.
To my family - I owe my life to you. Thank you for not giving up on me. Thank you for fighting this battle with me. I will be better and give back all the good things you’ve shown me.
To my ex-boyfriend, Thank you for the wonderful 8 years. I never regret spending it with you. I hope you heal from all the hurt. Its truly sad we have to end this way, but you are right to leave this relationship if its too painful for you already. Maybe someday, when we’re both healed - we’ll cross our paths again and continue our story. I’ll leave it to the universe and Lord to orchestrate it if its meant to happen.
To myself - Hopefully you can get your spark back as soon as possible and pay off your debts - and once you’re debt free - you can come back to this post to update everyone the success and be the example that its never too late to change. As long as you have the willpower to fight it and change - combine it with putting back the Lord into your life - you can be anything you wanted to be. You can live peacefully again.
To the readers - if you get to reach here, thank you for spending the time and hopefulky you’ll learn from my life story. If you’re not yet gambling - don’t ever start. Life is so much better without it.
✨🍃🌷🌸
Had to retype this cus of the stupid formatting. But I lost close to 180 dollars on card crush doing 5 dollar bets on surrender blackjack. It took me like 4 days to make this much money man. I know 200 isn’t too much. But now I have a pathway to gamble again that isn’t easy to block. I’m just so frustrated right now man!
38m. Been playing poker/gambling since I was 15. Won and lost 100s of thousands over the years. I’m on a 42 day streak now with not $1 gambled. I have a bunch of money saved because I have good job and no bills but what now? There is no joy in my life. I get the urges every single day. Even right now typing this. I love poker. I love the occasional bj/slots trip to casino. Can I not gamble responsibly? I’m just curious what people do to fill that void when they’re bored.
Hey everyone, i present to you my app that helps people reduce/stop gambling you can find it on stillrecoveryapp.com
im gonna start from the very beginning. First I only played on roulettes till i found slots. At first, I lost 5k and eventually by continuing to play i lost almost my 7k newly deposited balance but fortunately i was able to win it back. Now I just wanted to play casually, but as i win, i got the 5k that i lost back by starting very small bets and increasing them as i win. I even had extra winnings and even bragged about it, that u recovered from my losses and still had extra money. Then last night came, I deposited only ₱200 and won ₱900 from it, i shouldve cashed out because this is where it went downhill. I used it all up on slots and i couldnt stop. so i deposited ₱500, and a few ₱1000, till it went to ₱3000, and lastly ₱5000. at this point i had lost the ₱10000, i still had ₱6000 left and at that point i won but still had ₱3000 lost. I shouldve cashed it out and cut my losses but i wanted to win it back. So used it all up and im left with nothing. Im still a student, unemployed, so for me, this was a-lot of money to me. Can someone give me tips or advices so i could quit gambling. What do you usually do when you get the urge? I’ve read that distractions, new hobbies, etc. helps but I can’t get my mind off it, its like im still hoping i could win it back.
I gambled on nfl preseason and lost 1500$. Im so mad at myself. I was doing great. I just blew my next paycheck.
Hello.
I was a recent gambler on online websites for the past 2 years and lost, not only my time, but also myself. Gambling had a devestating impact on my social life and uni life; i almost never stop thinking about gambling. I spent my freetime thinking and writing down roulette strategies rather than socializing or playing sports as before. I lost connection to my family, lost concentration in my studies, and i genuinely feel like my IQ is dropping second by second. Please guys, stop before you lose your mental health and relationships. Gambling damages you and shatters your social life. I am neutral right now (no losses and no wins) after I wagered almost 20k dollars. I'm very furious at the time I spent infront of dealers and slots that I knew were non-profitable. I'm mad about how many times my heart rate increased for a roulette spin or game that drains your emotions. I'm young (20) and I'm pretty sure that my cholesterol levels are as high as a 50 year old. Guys, just forget and STOP. Gambling ages you. Enjoy your life and try to be satisfied with the money you have now.
Cars at the shop burning smoke coming out of the exhaust when I fired her up yesterday this car is my first big purchase that I made when I was still living with my parents till 25 now 28 currently living on my own and picked up around 25k trading and gambling credit card debt and using my savings and Roth IRA in the past 2 years retirement funds being the only thing I didn't fuck up. Car is a sports car so it will be a pretty expensive fix I have almost nothing saved for the repair since I've been trying to build my roth ira(5k) back up while paying debt off weekly because I got into a plumbing union trade earlier on and make good money now. honestly not proud of myself giving into this addiction and have been trying to get through it as fast as possible but selling the car is something I told myself I'd never do currently on work break typing this out because the car is one of the few things that brings me joy in life driving the insurance rental this morning was like a wake up call typing this out to vent so i can work up the courage to tell my parents I fucked up and move back in so I can get rid of these debts.
1 year na ako ‘di nagsusugal then last night nalasing ako. habang nag sscroll ako sa fb may nakita ako na naka live na nagsusugal, so ako tamang nood lang hanggang naisipan ko mag cash in. 3k lang muna una kong cash in ayun natalo then nag cash in ulit ako ng 10k hanggang sa umabot ng 60k yung nacash in ko. ngayon di ako makabangon sa kama hindi rin makakain. paano ko mababawi yun ipon ko yun mula nagtrabaho ako
I’m 27, turning 28 next year, and I’m at a point where I know I need to stop hiding from a financial mistake I made.
A while back, I borrowed $15,000 from my brother. I told him the money was going toward clearing a margin debt.
That wasn’t the truth.
The reality is that his money had already been lost. I was ashamed, scared of how he would react, and I convinced myself that I could somehow make the money back and fix everything before he found out.
Instead, things went in the opposite direction.
I’ve continued trying to make progress toward restoring his money, but I’ve realized I still have a significant amount left to repay. Based on my current accounting, there is another $7,651 that I need to restore, although I’m still making sure I have the exact numbers right so I don’t double-count anything.
The hardest part right now isn’t even the money. It’s knowing that I lied to my brother because I was afraid to tell him the truth.
Tonight I finally worked up the courage to call him and tell him everything. He’s in another country, and unfortunately it was around 1 a.m. where he lives, so he didn’t answer. I’ll have to have the conversation when he’s awake.
I’m terrified.
I’m afraid he’ll be angry about the money, but I’m equally afraid he’ll be hurt that I lied to him.
I’m not asking anyone here to tell me that what I did was okay. It wasn’t. I made a terrible financial decision and then made it worse by lying about it.
What I want now is to take responsibility and repay him completely.
I’ve been working my regular job and using my days off to make extra money through Uber Eats, DoorDash, and photography. I’m trying to stop looking for quick ways to recover the money and instead rebuild it through actual work and consistent contributions.
I’ve also stopped trading options because I recognize that trying to recover losses through more risky trading is exactly how I got myself into this situation.
My questions are:
How would you approach the conversation with my brother?
What would you say when admitting that the original $15k wasn’t used for what I told him?
How would you structure repayment of a debt this large while still keeping enough money for basic expenses and emergencies?
Has anyone here been in a similar situation where you had to come clean about a major financial lie to a family member? How did it go?
What would you do differently if you were in my position?
I know I can’t undo what happened.
I would really appreciate honest advice, even if it’s hard to hear
1 year ago I got into 14k debt within a month, worked 250 hours+ a month, didn’t buy anything for myself, just work and nothing else. Iv been doing it for almost a year, 2 months ago I slipped bad and kept on losing and going deeper into debts. Now I’m back at 10k in debt, my salary is above 1k, that’s barely enough to survive with. I don’t know what to do, working these hours already affected my life and my health, I cant deal with the fact that I’m gonna have another year of suffering. Got a girlfriend that wants to move in with me, she knows about the problem but she doesn’t know how bad it is and that I wouldn’t be able to support myself financially. Feeling helpless. Just wanted to vent out.
My money is growing pretty good now, around 1200 dollars saved up. But all I want to do is play bubble crapps, come on man. Why can’t she just give me the cards? At this rate I got to go to Walmart and get a new money card or something dang man.
Started betting last year and it's been an up and down shit show. Guess many people have similar stories here. I started with small bets, increased it, great months in a row, thinking I can do this for a career, my fiance even encouraged me as I was extremely consistent just to fall on my ass. My ego couldn't take the losses, and I tilted like a mf. Off course kept my losses from my fiance, so she kept encouraging me while I believed I just needed to stay logical and that I could get back to where I was before.
Low and behold after my biggest loss I made it all back and more and felt like the fuckin man. I thought I had it all figured out. Fucking awesome lifestyle, working from home, make bucks betting on a sport I love to watch(tennis) and everything will be fine and dandy. I did well for a bit and then boom. Tilt monster striked again and I almost climbed out of the hole but it all inevitably crashed.. My fiance eventually found out how much I lied to her. I didn't lose a shit ton but we were already in a tight spot, so what I lost was significant and a lot to us.
She realized I started selling shit to get out of the hole, even drove in a dodgy location to sell my tennis racket and almost got killed.. It was a scammer who just wanted my phone. Car window was shattered with a rock...Did dumb shit all because I believed I could help my fiance and I get out of our debt. (Her debt is not because of me, she had it before me)
I've never been rich so didn't have the "luxury" of losing a shit ton of money, but when your bank account says 0 and your fiance now pays for everything, it's beyond embarrassing. I don't feel like a man because I don't even feel like a human anymore. I started lying about how I would spend the money my fiance gave me working her fucking ass off while I gambled that away. Told her I'll stop. Nope..Was trapped in the fucked up cycle of lying about gambling to ease our financial pressure since that is more money than what I can earn being a teacher. Aaaand then losing more money digging a deeper hole. Then lying about that too because you already feel like such a loser delusionally believing you can turn it around.
It's extremely selfish and ego driven. I do believe most gamblers genuinely want to get their family out of the financial situation but that's the delusion.. The very thing that caused the problem can't be the solution.. The problem with my betting style is I was calculated and more of a grind better. I wouldn't do parlays and stuck to very specific types of bets. Also mostly betted on lower odds with higher amounts. So more of a slow drip with occasional higher odds to "outwork" the system carefully lol. Nah, need an outrageously high win percentage for that to work long term. It's why I had good months but with the inevitable bad months.
So my style of betting can be viewed as even more dangerous than the better who lives by parlays, ridiculous money on 50/50 bets.. I didn't really do that. Well my version of that when I tilted was still fairly tame compared to most. It was way more insidious, and that is why I felt I had it under control.
The thing now is we have bills to pay and we need money quite fast but I can't sit and watch a player miss an easy forehand or miss the line by a hair to determine if I'm happy or not. That fucking sinking and helpless feeling when you know your bet is yet again in big trouble. Heart pounding, praying to God your player somehow gets back. I hate that my money is in a player's hands who doesn't even know me. He doesn't know my specific bet and to up his game to work for me and try his best.
Sometimes players get lazy and throw matches they should win because they still have money, cars and a big house when the match is over. I don't and I need them to do their fuckin best dammit lol. Just pointing out the ridiculous nature of betting. The sheer amount of variables you don't know of. Maybe the player's uncle died, maybe his gf left him, maybe maybe maybe. You as a bettor, don't know all the variables. All of the research in the world can't give you everything.
Alas, the helpless feeling of a fish on land and having your money in the hands of a stranger who doesn't even know or care about you is fuckin insanity man.
I think gambling might be worse than drugs, because some people will gamble with the intention to improve their life you know what I mean? But if you do drugs you just don’t really care and probably are just looking for a high. There’s definitely people that gamble with that same mentality but there is more nuance to gambling motivation I feel.
So my problem keeps getting worse and worse. This may not work for everyone, but here's what I'm trying. And please, let me know if there is a workaround you guys can think of that I may be overlooking.
I cut my debit card into pieces. I still have it in my Google wallet. I can still go to the actual bank and withdraw cash, though. I'm closing that bank account and opening an account with Ally which has no physical location. I ordered a debit card, am going to add it to my Google wallet immediately, then cut that card up. I confirmed that this bank does not allow tap transactions on any ATMs.
I downloaded AppBlock and paid $30 for the year. I input every web address I could find (searched online casinos for hours) that I could play slots on, turned it on strict mode with my fiance's email being the only way I will be able to turn it off or delete the app. I set a parental control on my Playstore and had my fiance choose the pin so I am unable to download any apps rated higher than Teen without him on my phone.
Only thing left I could think of that would be possible is switching devices to gamble, if I did it online. We have one other device that could be used in the house and it is my fiance's laptop. Anything I could do to prevent me using that in the future? I never have, but anything is possible when you have a gambling problem.
Good luck, everyone.