u/kalesuzic

I've been with my girl [22F] for 5 months now. Our relationship started normal, we met, dated, etc. The problem started like 1 month into our relationship when I met her parents.

I look like a lesbian okay? Short hair, manly clothes, you can guess. They figured it out right away. And, as you might guess, they are homophobic. A few days later they took her phone, read our messages, figured out we are together, and forbid her from seeing me or talking to me. Her brother sent me a break up message from her phone. I thought it was over.

After two days I got a call from her on viber. She told me she didn't have anything to do with the message, they forced her to read the Bible everynight, blocked me everywhere. She had to memorise my number to call me. We talked and decided to see each other in secret.

My parents know and support us, so I am a little eased on that. I can always travel to her when needed etc.

But since then, we always have to mastermind a time to see each other. She works in a shop, I currently don't do anything (I am waiting to start a course in october). So, we mostly see each other before her work, after or on breaks. The problem is, she can't even lie to them. When she goes with some of her friends, parents ask her to send a pic. She can't lie about work either bc her mom checks up on her from time to time. It's really not normal.

She managed to come to my house a few times when her parents are on a trip, so no one can check on her at work.

Aside from the parents problem, we are perfect together. We really are healthy and love each other.

If it was me I wouldn't give a though, I would tell my parents that they can't control me. If they can't accept it I would move out. But she is different. She does plan on it in like a year or two but not anytime soon. She always has a place with me but it's kind of too soon to move in together. We are not even a year into the realtionship.

I love this woman. She loves me. She risks everything by still seeing me. But I am scared. And tired. I need to travel at least an hour to see her, and there were times when she is on a break for like 15 minutes and needs to leave. Her collegaues are great support, they cover when they can but still there is not much they can do.

I am out of my mind for weeks now. It hurts to not be able to see her. To call her when I need her. And for what? Bc we are both girls? Maybe if I looked straight they wouldn't care... I am just mad at the world. I found the girl that I want everything with and I can't even buy her flowers or something.

I know there is nothing you can guys tell me that I haven't already heard. I just need to let it out.

In no universe will I let breaking up be an option. It's completely another thing if something happens between us or we stop loving each other, but while it still works, I am not breaking up. I just need to see a vision where this can work. She avoids talking about it. I understand that you love your family, I really do, but if they can't accept you... I mean my parents were againts me being gay at first. But they got used to it after a few years. Maybe if she just talked to them again... I don't know. I don't want to make her choose. But it's killing me. Her too. I just idk what to do anymore.

My friends aren't helpful. They either hate her and are like "Break this up it's not working" or adore her bc they see how healthy and in love we are. My mom even loves her.

I just needed to vent...

So, I read in every way posible over the years. I have been a reader for like 6 years. I am 19 now.

It's no secret I am a physical book girlie. I already talked here about e-reading, kindles etc but I want to talk audio.

I have listened to some audiobooks over the past. I think it's a great way to consume books. I don't really like music and am not a fan of podcasts so when I walk for example or do chores I love to have a book in my ear.

But, I don't know honestly. I love the idea of audiobooks just everytime I actually listen to some it's kind of hard.

I started listening to them in english on audible or everand, and that was a disaster. I know english very well but combined with my attention span, especially genres like fantasy, hell nah.

So I got to thinking, I am almost sure that I can enjoy audiobooks. But there need to be some rules.

1. Only in my native language (Serbian).

2. Not too long. I think even 10 hours is really pushing it.

3. Not every genre. Especially not fantasy or something where I need to remember a lot of names. The best I think would be thrillers maybe or even nonfiction.

The point is:

Please give some tips for listening to audiobooks "as a begginer". I was thinking to maybe start with immersive reading but I can't do that while I walk and do chores which is what audiobooks are for, for me.

I don't have a lot, but, there are some books that I would sell my soul for. Frankenstein being my favorite classic of all time, and Gideon the Ninth (Or the whole Locked tomb series) being my favorite modern one.

I read both books again at the beggining of the year, like January. But I miss them!

And well, I read them the first few times in Serbian, and now I got the English original for both! I want to see if it's different reading in English. Maybe not right away but, should I do it? But then I have this long TBR of books and maybe I should just wait for a few years...

Bonus: for Gideon, I read the first two books in the series, Gideon and Harrow. I want to read Nona (the third book) so that's another reason.

I, 19F, am going to a trip with my school on friday. Which is in like two days. We are going to Paris (I live in Serbia btw). We will stop to sleep in Milano and Minhen too. It's gonna be like 10 days. So, a lot of time in the bus!

I love to read. I own a lot of books. Books are my life and I want to read in the bus. (I can talk to people but I am not really friends with anyone who is going, I have a girl with who I will sit with but that's it).

I also don't own an ereader anymore. So I have two options. Bring some physical books or read on a tablet.

Fun fact: I hate reading on my tab. I just don't enjoy it. I can't stand anything that is not a physical book. Not ebooks, not audiobooks. I mean I can if i have to but.. you got it.

But I can't decide what to bring. Currently I am reading: The Odyssey (40%), Sad Tiger (15%) and I started yesterday IT by Stephen King. These are big books.

I've been thinking about this for days. Idk what to do. I do want to read but I don't want to have a whole suitcase full of books. Especilally bc I also plan on buying some there.

My question is, should I at least bring a few? If yes, how to choose how many and which ones? I am also a mood reader so it's hard to decide sometimes. Uh.