u/katslice

Hi all, is a bit of a long one so sorry in advance. my LO is about to turn 7 months and my MIL has started to take her out the house for a few hours 2x a week. This is something I didnt/ don’t feel ready for but my husband and MIL told me it needs to happen sooner or later otherwise she’s going to get anxiety around having other people take care of her in future. She has been dropping hints constantly the past few months about when it’s going to be time to have her and how shes dropped her hours off work and now she’s getting paid less for no reason. Mind you there was no prior discussion about her having my child on certain days of the week/ her dropping hours from work. So there’s been a bunch of pressure for this to happen from her end. However, my LO is developing some separation anxiety and she has started to get upset everytime she goes out with her and leaves me. She cries as soon as she’s out my arms and leaves the house and as I close the door I cry just as much seeing her this way. I can’t seem to see a benefit for anyone in the situation apart from my MIL getting what she wants out of this scenario. Also, most times when she comes back my LO’s eyes are red as though she’s been crying again. My MIL says she doesn’t cry whilst they’re out and only cries in the car on the way home and that is why her eyes are red when she brings her back (my LO has never cried a single time when she’s in the car with me) I think she’s only saying it is the car making her upset so that so that I don’t put a pause of her taking her out if I’m being honest. I’ve tried to ask if I can tag along on the trips out but she either changes the subject or makes me seem like I’m overreacting saying “it’s only a few hours she will be fine.”, it’s like she wants her all to herself and doesn’t want to include me. As soon as my LO comes back home she will burst into tears crying because she’s been away from me. It’s worth mentioning my LO has never been one to cr. I guess I’m asking for advice because I’m always battling on what I should do? Do I take a pause on her having trips out and face the wrath from my MIL? My husband and MIL think she just needs to “get used to it” but I’m not sure how that works for a 7 month olds mind? I’m a FTM so I don’t know if this is all normal behaviour. My heart tells me I just want her at home with me all the time right now, but ultimately I just want what’s best for baby. Any advice on how to go about this all for the best interest of my LO? Am I overreacting? it’s making me so upset and I feel so pressured. TIA