r/BeyondTheBumpUK

So we've just started very lazy elimination communication with our baby. What this looks like for us is we put our baby (was 6 months when we started, now 7) on the potty every morning and before bath time then, if convenient, after naps. We use nappies the rest of the time. For us the benefits have been.

- She didn't have a poo routine before we started (which made me think this wouldn't work) but now poos within 5 minutes of sitting on the potty in the morning. No more having to pop out of a baby class or stop breakfast because she's done a poo.

- We make it really fun so she absolutely loves it so it's become one of my favourite things to do with her.

- No blowouts since we started so less washing.

- It's faster and nicer (for me) than changing poo nappies.

- No nappy bin smells because she rarely poos in a nappy now.

So I'm curious, I totally get that it's not for everyone but I've been shocked at how easy it's been and how much time it's saved me yet I've read loads of people being quite sneery about it online saying that it only works if you have nothing else to do with your day or never leave the house which just doesn't seem to fit my experience. So if it's something you would never try, is it because you prefer changing nappies to emptying a potty (completely valid) or some other reason?

My little one had a right side preference from birth which meant he developed a flat spot on the right. After a few osteopath visits at 5 months, he began moving his head both sides and is now much more mobile and is sitting. He is 7 1/2 months old. When I look at his head side on from the left or right, it looks a nice shape but from the top (eagle view) I see that the right is still a little flatter than the left. Everywhere I read online tells me this will round out itself as baby grows, but I worry I’ve ruined his head shape by not acting sooner. Can anyone share their experience of how true it is that the head will eventually round itself out from a flat spot?

We will be going on our first holiday abroad when LO is 6 months old.
I will be taking my own car seat and checking it in as we have a private car transfer to / from the hotel.

My question is do I take my own travel system (Joie finiti) so I can use the base and seated pram attachment around the hotel / at night as it lies flat for LO to sleep in

Or do I buy a cheaper travel stroller for the purpose of the holiday. Eg there’s a Graco one that lays flat for about £65 incase it gets lost / damaged

Keen to hear how others have used a pram on holiday
We are in an all inclusive resort and won’t be leaving the resort at all.

I’m probably being so cautious but before pregnancy I’d always get my nails done… I think it was biosculpture paint OR I would just get a manicure with normal polish…. I’ve a wedding to go to and it would be quite nice to spend an hour getting my nails done while my husband is on leave.

I’m worried about a few things:

1. Is it bad for the baby when you handle them? I know it’ll be dry so probably not

2. If I get biosculpture is the UV light somehow bad for breast milk?! I know there’s probably more risk to my skin

3. Is it safer to get normal polish? But that actually does smell of chemicals sometimes even when dry

I’m probably overthinking this…

First few weeks we had a lovely NCT chat which died off after one of the mums had a falling out with another.

The other 2 became close friends as one the other gave them both and babies a lift to groups because she had a spare isofix base (my lift offers didn’t get accepted even though I’m confident with seatbelt set up for baby car seats).

We would arrange regular meet ups but I just ended up getting lost as a third wheel as I was so behind on what was going on in their lives while they got to catch up a lot.

I couldn’t always attend the same classes as them as I was either having therapy for a bereavement or nap times didn’t align.

I had tried so hard at other groups independently but friendships are either so established they don’t really have enough interest beyond small talk or the really nice mums who I could have potentially bonded with have had babies at different stages and they age up and move to another group and I don’t see them enough to exchange numbers without it seeming a bit random/odd.

The NCT pair are involving other mums in their social plans and I’m out of the loop again. I feel the minimal contact they give is based on pity because of the nature of bereavement I suffered while pregnant (3 days before NCT) and beyond that they just don’t see a long term friend.

*I suppose I’m not asking for advice, just solidarity that other people have had this experience?*

I get so upset as someone who is really craving friendship in a new area (since 2024, no other friends here) in a super vulnerable time as a new mum while grieving my dear dad.

I don’t struggle to get on with anyone, I know I’m really friendly and caring, so I am just so miserable I’ve ended up with no mates (apart from my little baby obviously ❤️)

Can anyone recommend one that is easy to open one handed with arthritis?

Second time mum, and losing my mind with anxiety over my LO’s sleep. She has prolonged jaundice as she is EBF and has been investigated for thyroid issues. She has the all clear on both of these but my concern is that she sleeps so much! She sleeps through all the noise from my 3.5 year old! All she seems to want to do is sleep. She will wake for feeds in the day but I am still waking at night. If we are lucky she might have an awake time for around an hour in the morning, and often cluster feeds in the evening. She’s gaining weight but slowly and has plenty of wet/dirty nappies. I’m worried about her calorie intake and am so tempted to start on some formula. My first was so aware and awake at this point with so many smiles and cooing. Why isn’t my second doing the same?! Any one with similar experience please can you reassure/give advice?!

After becoming parents we tried a bunch of baby tracking apps because we kept forgetting feeds, naps and diaper changes during night shifts.

Most apps felt either:
• too complicated
• outdated
• overloaded with ads
• or missing sync between parents

So I compared the most popular ones we tested.
Would love to hear if I missed any.

1. Baby Tracker - Soriva — 4.8/5
   Best for:
   • real-time sync between parents
   • clean modern UI
   • nap predictions
   • fast logging

Cons:
• still a newer app
• fewer integrations than older apps

2. Huckleberry — 4.6/5
   Best sleep prediction features.
   Very polished.
   Can feel expensive quickly.

3. Baby Daybook — 4.2/5
   Feature packed.
   Good for detailed tracking.
   UI felt slightly overwhelming for us.

4. Nara Baby — 4.0/5
   Minimal and clean.
   Good free option.
   Missing some advanced syncing/reminders.

Would love recommendations from other parents.

I'm on maternity leave and was due to return to work in January 2027, however my current employer has ended my role in a restructure and an alternative wasn't available. I'm now in the waiting period for that contract to officially end, and very much enjoying time at home with my baby.

Much sooner than expected I've been invited to interview at a different company for a role that ticks all my boxes career wise. It's the type of role that doesn't come up often, so it's not one I want to pass by. The new company doesn't know that I'm on maternity leave, but they do know my contract is ending - though I haven't given a specific date for when. If I was to be successful, ideally I would have a phased start - eg part time from autumn before going full time in the new year, pending child care which can't be confirmed until I know a start date and working patterns. Three month notice periods are common in my industry and seniority level, so these timings don't feel totally unreasonable to me, though I'd imagine the phased start would be challenged.

From an HR perspective, when would you want a candidate to disclose this information? And how would you expect this to be disclosed?

My gut instinct says to keep this information to myself until I'm further in the process (at least stage 2 of a 3-stage process) so they get to know me, otherwise they might write me off as a non-serious candidate. But is there anything else I need to consider?

I had a lovely VBAC with my little boy 2 days ago. Labour was 40 hours from start to finish, pushing only 15 minutes thankfully and a small labial graze which didn’t need any stitches.

The first 24 hours after birth I had so much adrenaline I didn’t really feel any pain, just a bit of sting when I went for a wee.

I’m now kind of feeling like my body has been hit by a train, my muscles are incredibly sore all over my body and I’m stinging quite a bit down there when I go for a wee.

As my first was a c section I’ve only ever experienced a long recovery so I have no idea what to expect this time!

If anyone has any tips outside the usual advice like taking regular pain relief I’d be really grateful 😊

At 5 weeks 5 days, after a long weekend staying with family, my now 6 week baby boy surprised us by knocking out from 12am-5am Sunday evening, 12am-6am Monday and Tuesday evening, and last night he slept from 11:45-7am. I recently upped his formula intake from 4oz every 2 hours to 5oz every 2-3 hours or whenever he’s hungry (yesterday he cluster fed 2oz every hour before bed) and he would either finish the bottle or leave half to a quarter in the bottle.

Since he was born he’s only ever given us 2-3 hour stretches if we’re lucky. Normally it was every 2 hours since birth on the dot he’d wake up crying & hungry and my husband would make the bottle and I’d feed him.

Baby has regained his birth weight and then some. He was born almost 3.9kg / 8.7lbs. So he was a chonkster. He now at 6 weeks weighs 5.6kg / 12.3lbs. Hence why I upped his intake from 4oz to 5oz.

Part of me thinks his body is adjusting well to the new 5oz and he’s not as starving for his growing body like before. The irrational part of me thinks something may be terribly wrong…

He is wetting diapers 5-8 times a day and doing a good poop once a day, so he’s not showing any warning signs. He naps whenever I put him down in his Najell carrier or his bassinet only after a feed and burp. He would just close his eyes, milk drunk, and have a nap. Or he would nap on me, which he finds the most comfortable. So nothing out of the ordinary. We had his blood work done a few weeks ago and everything came back normal, no bacteria in blood etc. He also has grown out of his newborn and up to 1 month clothes almost overnight also, and he’s now in 0-3, however they’re getting quite tight almost every day.

I’ve also noticed over the last weekend that he has way more energy than before. He’s flailing his arms and legs and looking around the room, tracking me and others as they walk past him and behind him. He’s become way more aware of people & life around him. If we have conversations with him he will babble and squeal in baby replies, which again has never happened before and I feel like it’s been unlocked this weekend when my mother was talking to him constantly. It maybe unlocked a new feature of his I feel!

Has anyone else experienced this sudden literal overnight change in sleep? Does anyone know why this happens? Is he going through another growth spurt?
He wears an Owlet monitor to sleep every night, which eases my anxiety. Will this sleep last, or am I supposed to wait until he’s back to waking every 2-3 hours starving?

4 months in and I’m still feeling pain. It got better recently but then I had a cold and was coughing and sneezing. The only way I can describe is that it feels sore inside and above the scar is still numb the scar itself when I press down feels almost ropey and lumpy (bigger lumps in some areas which had the most pain during recovery). Oh and my abs are so weak.

I really question why anyone would elect to do this you are essentially in pain for over a quarter of a year. I had no choice but to do it, luckily it wasn’t an emergency. I found it really hard to be in so much pain while trying to care for my baby. It has made it much harder to feed him hold him and just do basic everyday things. I feel like there is not much support afterwards either.

Can any other mums relate? Is this normal?

I don't cope well in the heat, at all. If I'm not able to be poolside with a mojito, summers usually consist of me hiding in our bedroom sitting next to a portable air-conditioning unit all day...

So now I've seen the forecast of 30 degrees for the best part of a week in London I am seriously stressing!!

What on earth am I going to do with our 10MO all day - and more importantly, at night?!

*cries*

Edit: Really appreciate all the suggestions! Sadly we are in a flat with no garden so paddling pool is out the question cries even more! - but seems like shady park spots, ice cold m&s trips, 0.5 tog with nappy, and getting our air con unit going is going to be the survival approach!

Feeling like a rubbish mum this evening and looking for some insights!

I've come across what seems to be a really good resource from the Caroline Walker trust about what to feed babies at different ages. Mine is 8m and the guide for 7-9m olds says they should have breakfast, lunch with pudding and dinner! We're not even up to three meals yet (going to move to that in the next couple of weeks I just haven't had the headspace) - is anyone doing this?

Also, it gives a sample 7 day menu and every day is a whole different meal with entirely different ingredients. My approach so far has been to make something then divide it into two or three portions for that many days - for example, tonight I cooked her salmon, potato and spinach for the next three days. Am I totally messing this up? Should she be having different things every day?!

FTM in case the frantic tone of this post hadn't given me away 😂

Seriously, this never even occurred to me before my 98th centile daughter was born and now I'm coming across the problem everywhere. She's 7 months and 10 kilos, and many products (changing tables, especially ones in public, baby carriers, travel cots, car seats) max out at 11 kilos which seems to be the average for a 12 month old.

She outgrew her next-to-me at 4 months. We're dangerously close to running out of nappy sizes. We've sorted the car seat with an AXKID extended rear-facing seat now but just ...??? Everything seems that much more difficult trying to source things and find facilities for our big babies without moving them up to toddler options which might not be appropriate developmentally.

Anyone else finding this?!

My 7 month old has suffered from pretty severe eczema from around 1 month. He's had numerous GP appointments and has tried hydromol, zeroderm, thirty30, aveeno dermexa and coconut oil. The only thing that has helped his flare ups is hydrocortisone 1% but I dont want to be using this constantly!

We use fragrance free detergent, cotton clothing and scratch mittens during the night.

I mentioned possible cows milk allergy to the GP who dismissed it straight away...

Any suggestions welcome! I've heard good things about Bioderma Intensive Baume which I will be trialling next I think...

i posted on here a few times expressing how my baby rarely sleeps through the night, was told to increase ww to 3/3/4 which usually i would follow. she knows how to put herself to sleep if placed in the correct time frame ww with her pacifier and even slept almost through the whole night many nights but still woke up here and there. she recently got sick and still is congested and i believe she is also teething, aside from giving medicine and suctioning her nose to help her feel more comfortable, she still remains uncomfortable. she is no longer to soothe herself to sleep & hasn’t been taking her usual naps well, she is back to taking 30-40 minute naps and will only go to sleep by feeding to sleep or rocked to sleep. she is constantly protesting nap time and bed time, i’m just confused because i have read a few people on here say that regressions are real and usually a timing issue. please help me, i feel like i am failing as a mother because other babies are so easy to nap and sleep through the night and i feel like i’m the reason my baby isn’t able to. she is ebf and her crib is right next to my bed due to her dad not wanting her to move into her own room, some nights i am so tired that i give in to cosleeping (safely) which i hate because i feel like i really don’t rest. what do i do to get her to go to sleep on her again and stop waking up screaming in the middle of the night? she knows how to stand, crawl and sit down from standing so i don’t believe that’s the problem. please help me, thank you!!!

When I look at videos online people talk about regular checks on baby's development etc. But the only time they last checked was at 8 weeks by the GP? Is it normal no one checks on her after that?

We're monitoring her weight ourselves at home with a baby scale. She's 5.5m.

Would you inly go to the GP if there was an issue?

Anyone else feeling the mental health support falls short?

I've previously had counselling years ago and I was half way through training to be a counsellor before getting pregnant. I consider myself self aware and overall quite resilient as a person.

I'm 6 months post partum and I'm struggling. Low mood, quite dark thoughts. Baby girl is the only thing keeping me going. I don't feel any concerns around her or towards her. I feel disconnected from my husband, family and friends. I go to one baby class on a Wednesday but I have struggled to meet other Mums.

I'm in Chester, GP receptionist thought I should speak to the health visiting team but the support you're advised to look at through them is the 0-19 starting well resources. It's all links to self help forms. No actual help from a professional. Do I contact GP again? Or do I just struggle on and hope it passes? I'm self aware enough to know I'm not suicidal but I am not myself and my thoughts are not what they'd usually be either. I feel poisonous.

Honestly, since becoming a mum I feel like a shell of my former self. I’m a mum of 3 (a 2 year old and 4 month old twins)

I used to take such pride in my appearance, I would always do my hair and makeup and look nice but now I can’t even put mascara on and honestly there’s days where I don’t even think I’ve brushed my hair.

I just feel a bit lost. I have severe diastasis recti since giving birth to the twins and it’s led to an apron belly. I can’t bear to look at myself in the mirror and just feel absolutely disgusting which I think isn’t helping towards my lack of making any effort.

I love my children to bits, have a very supportive husband but I just hate to look at myself. Has anyone faced anything similar? What can I do? I hardly have any time for myself these days so it’s difficult for me to even try and do my hair and makeup.