u/killedbydeathrock

I abused phenibut and pregabalin everyday for 5 years. I’d alternate between the two to prevent building too much tolerance and to prevent running out of my pregabalin script. Doing 300mg pregabalin on day one, 400mg pregabalin day two, 6g phenibut day three, repeat the cycle everyday. It was exhausting having to keep track of this cycle every single day and to live a lie of my use for 5 years. I finally admitted to my use when I was admitted to the psych ward 2 years ago. They tapered me off pregabalin very rapidly, 50mg twice daily for 2 days, 50mg once daily for 2 days, 25mg once daily for 1 day, then off. I struggled a lot getting off of it, I bet my glutamate levels were through the roof. But now I’m glad I don’t depend on these substances anymore. I don’t have to lie, I don’t have to be so calculating, I don’t have to worry about getting caught. If you’re still struggling quitting, just know it’s possible!

I was recently diagnosed with PMDD and one symptom I get during my luteal phase are intense thoughts that my loved ones are going to die. The most recurring is that my bf will die in a car accident or get seriously injured at his job as a mechanic apprentice. I get so convinced when he doesn’t respond to my texts for a long time that he died or got hurt, so I end up calling him, probably annoying him, and make up excuses as to why I called him when in reality I’m just making sure he’s alive and okay. This only happens during my luteal phase, it gets to a point where I get thoughts of all the terrible things I’d do to myself if he did die. Does anyone else get these kinds of thoughts?