Is this misogyny or just tech?
I feel like I’m going insane trying to figure out if I’m experiencing subtle misogyny at work OR if I’m just burnt out and overanalyzing everything. Or secret third option... this is just how it is and I either need to play the boys game or get out? lol
I’m a marketing manager at a SaaS company thats a smaller startup-ish company and for most of my time here (a little over a year) I actually felt pretty good about my role and felt like there was a direction to promote me to director level.
Lately though (especially the past 5 months), I’ve started noticing this pattern where I feel “in the room but forgotten.”
For context: I own a lot of our TOFU/content strategy work. I build campaigns, develop content, create messaging, write sales sequences, design graphics, plan and build workflows, build dashboards, document processes, etc.
The issue is I constantly feel like my work becomes other people’s “wins.”
Just a few examples...
- I create the campaign strategy, copy, content, creative, etc.
- Demand gen (man) sets it up in the ads platform.
Campaign performs well and he gets talked about as the strategic one
- Or my boss will reference collaborative projects in meetings as “X’s project” even when I’m heavily involved or originated the idea.
Nobody is openly rude to me. My manager says positive things about me. In external meetings he hypes me up and says I’m an amazing content marketer. In 1:1s he says I’m doing a great job. But internally especially leadership conversations I feel invisible or just not as valuable.
I keep hitting what feels like final straw then i regulate my emotions and feel ok for a bit and then something else happens.
- A new team member joined (also man) and pitched me a strategy that “helped him get hired.” It was literally a strategy I created and tried pushing internally since LAST September. I already had docs, workflows, landing pages, nurture sequences, slack groups etc built for it. Nobody mentioned I had already created it and it got abandonded because the people I needed to help me bring to completion just quite literally would ghost me or not prioritize it.
- I’ve repeatedly brought up issues with our product’s integration for months. Nothing happened until another male coworker brought it up, and wow... suddenly leadership cared.
- My boss reposted a LinkedIn strategy post I made by literally copy and pasting my writing and using my graphic with zero credit. Like deadass stole my entire LinkedIn post from my personal account lol
Unfortunately I have more examples but I'll leave it at that lol
I also feel like there’s this subtle dynamic where the men doing the “technical” or AI-heavy work get perceived as more strategic, while I get treated like the creative content person in the corner with an iPad making things look nice. Sorry I don't need Ai to do my entire job for me but the dudes sucking Claudes dick right now are somehow "top performers"?
I genuinely cannot tell if:
- this is startup chaos and poor leadership structure
- this is a “content marketing is undervalued” thing
- this is gender bias
- or some combination of all three
I don’t necessarily want to leave because I do have autonomy, I like a lot of my actual work, and I don't hate the people I work with. Plus I just got my husband addd onto my insurance and the job market rn is terrifying lol But this dynamic is really starting to affect me psychologically because I constantly feel underestimated or not fully respected despite objectively contributing a lot.
It's like my work is useful but my name is optional.
Has anyone else experienced this kind of “subtle but chronic” undermining dynamic in tech/startup environments? Especially where nobody is openly disrespectful so you constantly question your own perception??? And is there anything I can reasonably do as the solo woman on my team to position myself as a leader since job titles dont matter apparently lol
I'm coming from agency world so maybe I just didn't know what I was getting into jumping into SaaS. Literally any advice or reassurance would mean the world right now cause I have nobody to talk to about this. Thank you in advance 😭