Scammed and Revenge Gambled
Hello po, I'm 25M a college dropout with a freelancing job so far that's sustaining my needs. I will tell my story, reaching out here to gain help and advice.
I have the utmost hatred towards gambling because I've experienced the impact of it from my parents, who are active in gambling, and how our family came to be. But last week, I made a mistake that led me to my very depressing situation.
I have saved up money to surprise my girlfriend of 5 years, who is graduating this coming June. I want it to be extravagant because she gets to graduate first, despite my being older than her. I planned on giving a gift that was worth 30k, the one I saved up for months in secret. Unfortunately, this was all not coming into place because of how stupid I was to fall into a scam. I lost a total of 15k because of it. I won't share how it became, but that's what happened.
I was truly devastated and ended up confessing this mistake to my girlfriend. To the coming days of not eating, I have found my most stupid decision in using up all my remaining savings to gamble. This started during my slumber of being scammed, when a friend of mine, whom I witnessed winning a jackpot worth 10k with only just spending 500p in scatter. Through days of being devastated, I was motivated to try gambling because of this. I had spent every last of my savings in scatter. There are only a few instances when I won. I had a win that reached 20k that could've been enough to cover up what had been scammed from me. But I couldn't stop. I ended up losing everything and decided to get a loan from Ola's. I was relieved for a moment when I won 30k back, but gambling really had me. I thought I could do more. which ended up of me losing it all over again.
I hate myself for what I've become. And I became the one I genuinely hate. For now, I have a total of 50k debt and counting from Ola's because of the penalties.
Members of this sub, please, I need your help. I don't have a high-paying job, and I haven't been eating for the past week because of this. What should I do?