u/leerroi

I have been enjoying some good geo-arbitrage for 10+ years, but those days are coming to an end. My industry and employer has been declining for several years, and while there are some signs of bottoming out it has resulted in CEO change by the board and new policies. First order of business for new CEO is return to office, and as a senior leader this means moving from LCOL (Midwest) to HCOL (Los Angeles).

I have been asked what it would take for me to move, so I need to form a relocation request and would love feedback from anyone else who has been through this. Putting aside whether this is a good idea or not and focusing on the finances for the moment has left me with the following thoughts:

• 10% salary increase to cover income tax changes (3.8% flat to 14.4% progressive)
• Housing stipend to cover housing differential (more on this below)
• Guranteed severance if they cut me or change my position
• Normal one time relo costs (I have to sell a house), 50k grossed up
• Company paid travel home for 8 weeks a year
• Increased bonus percentage to hopefully one day make up for all of this (as a private company we dont have equity grants)

Regarding housing, my mortgage is 1.5k/mo. Rent for anything remotely comparable is 5-7k/mo in west LA where the office is. My thinking is the stipend should be 4k grossed up. I would rather take this as salary instead but I expect it would bust our pay bands. Not sure how I would approach making this permanent, but if it is temporary then I am essentially being forced to lose 50k+ a year.

Ultimately I think it is a tall ask from both sides, and I don't expect to get to make the transition at net neutral cash flow if it happens. Replacing this job would be difficult, and a handful more years even with increased expenses likely drops me from HENRY to just HE. I would prefer to not be penalized to the tune of 40-70k/yr though. Finding a different job in LA if things go south would be much easier than where I live currently, so there is some risk mitigation here. I have also considered keeping my house and offering more frequent travel instead, but ultimately I think moving is what they will want and require.

Other relevant info:

• SINK
• 360k income + bonus (likely no or minimal bonus for the next year or two minimum)
• $2.4m NW, about $2.1m liquid
• House worth 380k, 190k left on mortgage @ 2.6%
• No debt besides mortgage

Edit: Formatting fixes

I am a 37M SINK making ~400k/yr in non-FAANG tech. Recently my CEO was ousted and new CEO immediately enacted a company wide RTO policy which will, ironically, close the office I go to in LCOL. To keep my job I will need to move to HCOL (50%+ more expensive). We will have something like six months to make the move or resign. The team (130 people) I've spent 10 years building is basically destroyed by this policy. My only real reason for staying had been for the team, but if they blow up the team I don't feel an obligation to sort through the wreckage.

My brother has a severe and potentially life threatening health condition, so moving away seems callous and probably stupid. I also found out my senior dog has cancer today and probably not much time left. My house was randomly hit by a hail storm 3 weeks ago and the roof and siding were destroyed. Not sure why life is giving me the middle finger, but perhaps thats just 2026 for all of us.

My plan was to FIRE around 40 (or find a way less stressful job), so just a few years away. I am at $2.3M NW with $1.8m investments, $170k cash (was going to pay off mortgage just before FIRE). The rest is house and cars. Only debt is 190k mortgage @ 2.6%. Expenses as are 70kish a year, so not extravagant.

The paths I see are thus:

1. Stay for as long as possible without moving. Deal with the mess at work, ride out pay and benefits for 6 months. Searching for jobs right now seems like hell. Replacing this comp without moving is unlikely.

2. Move. Under different circumstances I would have welcomed it, maybe it would be good for me. The increased living cost doesn't matter that much compared to more years investing and not touching principal (plus healthcare). Forsake my family and friends for capitalism.

3. Get out ASAP, maybe not even two weeks notice. I have given this company a decade of my life and they are now treating people like shit. Many people would be sad and disappointed. I would leave a mess behind which is not typically the leader I am, but I also didnt make it. I have plenty of money for a while (maybe forever) so why bother with the stress a second more when I could take care of my family, my home, and make the final days for my dog as good as possible.

4. Something else I haven't considered.

TLDR -- Brother, dog, house, and career are all dying at the same time. What would you do?