u/limitlessgtc

This just gives me anxiety, and got in the way of my coding last night (was in ~/.bash_aliases making shortcut commands for big scripts, like mounting the second partition, at "/dev/mmcblk1p3 /roms", and checking battery percent while in terminal,

And a load of other stuff,

And tons of arguments with my parents,

Also info dump: I have ADHD, they treat me like I'm just a tiny human (like not allowed to do stuff, like going out at all, and also I'm not allowed to accept gifts off of my mates, and also I can't install the stuff I need, I am exceptionally smart in the field of IT, and I just feel trapped, like i can't do anything (i almost died due to (sh) but luckily I didn't go too far(but i do have tons of scars), I also just get no exercise, stay in my room all day, (because my father made it so my pc wouldn't post) and he keeps on blaming it on me, and when i say a good point, he deflects/tells me to do something, and also when i tell them how I feel, they just say "give us the phone then" like taking my stuff isn't gonna help, and makes me feel so powerless, cuz if i try to defend myself at all, they just make it longer before I get my stuff back, i don't interact with anyone, and also i barely get any dinner, like im a 15 year old, underweight (44kg) boy, i only get like 5-8 nuggets, a day, also my pc has been damaged for 5 months now, and he said first "ill fix it when i have the time" then after "ill fix it when your full time in school" (now im full time in school) then hes saying "you have to do full time work in school" like it's really hard for me, and it's pushing me closer and closer to the end

I just wanna manage my website, carry on coding, and actually have a childhood, and my dad tells me that the stuff I do "is illegal" like how is being interested in complex things and coding, "illegal"?

I also ain't able to install apps to backup my personal data, and I don't have access to anything, since I'm a second user on my android 15 phone (DooGee Fire 3, default model, 720*1440, 5.45inch screen)

and I cannot use the phone as a phone, since second user, like also I wanna install apps for coding, but nope my dad says "he's already told me" when I ask him what he told me, he just tells me to stop arguing, I am absolutely sick of life, i just wanna pursue my interests, and also i would literally be fine with restrictions that are verbally said, and i barely sleep, idk what to do anymore, nobody cares about me at all, not even people like my support worker, when i tell them how i feel, they also dismiss it, what do i even do, like It's not like i will start going to sketchy websites, simply not into that crap, and also I wouldn't install stuff, only stuff i need like antivirus: malwarebytes, and like a proper VPN, and also, i would barely spend any time on my devices if it wasn't for my screentime limits