u/lingonberrynightmare

I'm in the beginning of my job hunt, and after 30+ applications I think I finally nailed my CV & Anschreiben and started getting interviews. Last week I had several, and I kind of feel like I screwed up all of them.

My German is pretty ok, but unfortunately not flawless enough for the kind of positions I am going for (not in tech). What's even worse, I am in a pretty rough spot in my life right now (probably depressed, I cry every day etc.) and it obviously affects my confidence and my demeanour.

I have another important interview coming up in a couple of days for a really, really good position, and I am afraid to screw up all over again. Someone with my qualifications and a more charming/confident personality would have already been hired but I feel like a wet blanket nobody wants to see in their team. I also tend to undersell myself in general.

Is anyone else like that? Any tips?

Has this happened to anyone and how did you deal with it?

I was hanging out with a group of people I barely know today and my friend (the only person I knew well there) just casually brought up that I told her I feel insecure about my age when dating (the whole spiel with men preferring younger women etc.) very loudly in front of everyone. I kinda wanted to die.

A while back another friend similarly made a "joke" about another painful insecurity of mine in front of other people - luckily I think that joke flew under the radar, but at this point I feel like I should never discuss my insecurities even with "close" friends ever again. Like wtf.

I wonder, what were the storylines that bothered you the most about the show?

For me it's two things, and they dampen my enjoyment of the show a little bit:

- The whole business with Darryl's baby. Surrogacy is a questionable topic for a reason, and the way they did it on the show, with Heather not even having had her own kids yet, is even more questionable.

- The ending with all the three guys fighting for Rebecca. I know a lot of people love her "choosing herself" in the end, but the fact that three of her exes just run back to her after all the damage she's done (and after the damage they did to her) feels kind of contradictory to the message of the show, imo. Dealing with your mental illness and discovering who you truly are does not automatically mean all your past destroyed relationships are going to be mended and people are going to throw themselves at the new enlightened version of you; it actually feels like the kind of a delusional thing oldRebecca would tell herself. I feel like Greg is the worst example of this, they shouldn't have recast him and made him go back to confessing his love for Rebecca. Sometimes our shitty actions make us lose important people in our lives and there's no going back and acknowledging that is also a part of healing.

Like many I read a lot when I was younger, but began to read less and less with age. Which is why a few years ago I began to set reading goals for the year, usually very modest (like 12-24 books a year).

The thing is, even though I didn't read much, or went for months without reading, when I did read I still enjoyed it immensely. Sure, there were some bad books here and there despite my selectiveness, but overall whenever I finished a book I'd think to myself why the hell am I not reading more, and would go and add more titles to my to be read pile.

But somewhere around last year I just lost all interest and joy when it comes to reading. I keep trying books that should in theory tick all my boxes, but I just find them dull and underwhelming. I've tried favourite authors and new authors, page-turners and more complex books, but I just remain disinterested and cold.

Has anyone experienced something like that? And how do I get my love for books back? Something like that happened to me with music a few years ago, when I just basically stopped exploring new music and got stuck with the same few songs, even going to the concerts of my favourite artists leaves me cold now. I really don't want to lose books too.

It's incredible how most of my favourite songs turn out to be from this season. Also I love old Greg lol, he's my spirit animal, and Santino Fontana's voice is sooo good. It's obvious he was supposed to be an integral cast member.

Makes me a bit scared to continue with later seasons... I know there's good stuff there too but like is it as good?..