u/littlelivethings

I waited for my daughter’s speech delay to resolve, and I think I missed my chance to train without a huge toddler power struggle fight.

My daughter is 2.5 and in daycare. I’ve been doing diaper free (naked bottom or in underwear) after daycare most days for a few weeks. My husband doesn’t want to be stuck at home on weekends, so we use diapers on and off on weekend days too instead of going full in. I know I’m going to have to take her out of daycare for a few days to do an oh crap style thing because my husband isn’t being helpful on weekends.

That said, I’m so frustrated with the power struggles and want to be prepared for when I rage her out of daycare to go all in. It’s clear from our “training” so far that my daughter figured out how to connect the pee feeling to peeing. She tells me she needs to go. But if I take her to the potty to do it, she screams and refuses to sit. Eventually she either goes in underwear, floor, diaper, or bath. She’ll sit and not go. She has peed in it twice in all our days of trying, and I think not completely emptying the bladder either.

My daughter is in daycare, so we can’t do the Oh Crap method blocks indefinitely (especially in the 20-30 month old range, because we just hit the end of it 😵‍💫). My 2.5 year old daughter is not responding to advice in Oh Crap when I’ve tried after daycare and on weekends. If I move her to the potty mid pee, she screams and locks her legs straight so I physically can’t move her. She also is very good at stopping herself from peeing more. She can hold her pee up to four hours it seems. I have tried prizes too, which get her to at least sit on the potty, but she doesn’t go. I think she can’t release on the potty anymore (she did at 18-20 months then suddenly stopped). I’ve tried Oh Crap’s advice—shhhh-ing in her ear, blowing bubbles, handling water, allowing some privacy, offering a choice between the potty and the toilet (she will not sit on the toilet ever). We have tons of potty book. She clearly has the bladder/bowel control to use the potty, I just can’t figure out the right approach for her personality. Any advice for other books is appreciated!