r/pottytraining

Alright gang after like 2 weeks of attempting this I'm throwing in the towel.

My son is UNBOTHERED by wet underwear, he'll sit in it like its not a problem, same with poop. Like if I shit myself that is priority number 1, but he could not give a fuck.

I was making him help me clean up any accidents, and we'd put the dirty underwear in the wash.

But he just like, doesn't care???

He can tell me he is wet, he tells me when he has already pooped. He can sit on the toilet when prompted ("It's time to go potty" is what I say). But lately he'll decline and say "not right now" or simply "I don't want to".

Like what do I do when he is flat our refusing?

Do I resort to bribes?

We are currently on day 2 of potty training our younger daughter (3 years old). The first day was okay, I was housebound with the 3 year old and 5 year old while my husband was at work and not feeling great but we had some success. Little even noticed the feeling at one point and got herself to the potty before she went, which in my book is a huge success for day 1 and also indicative to me that she’s more than ready.

The thing about Little is that she’s the quintessential second kid (and a classic three year old) - stubborn, feisty, fearless. I had assumed day 1 would go okay and day 2 would be when reality set in and she wouldn’t be so cooperative. Thus far that has proven to be the case. Much screaming and protest and not one successful pee in the potty today.

Here’s where my dilemma comes in — husband worked from home today and could hear the screaming and protesting drama. He texted me from his office “it sounds like she’s not ready. […] it just sounds like she’s not mentally ready.”
Not terribly helpful to receive this text as I’m cleaning up my piss-soaked kitchen and dealing with a screaming little kid obviously.
I think she’s mentally ready but just doesn’t WANT to. Two different things. Our eldest daughter was the unicorn kid who potty trained in a few days — we tried when she was two and a half and had a hellish weekend of protests and drama and tried again the day after she turned 3 (she verbally told us she wanted to be big and use the potty) and I can probably count on one hand the number of accidents she’s had since. So I assume he’s feeling like, well Big Sister was able to tell us when she’s ready, Little will too. But I don’t think that will be the case. We got lucky the first time. Little is a lot more stubborn, a lot more attached to her diapers, a lot more of a control freak.

Sorry — this massive post is all to say, his lack of faith is more demoralizing than the ocean of pee I’ve wiped off the floors today. Has anyone else dealt with this? It’s also more than a little frustrating considering I’m a SAHM and he works full time so it’s going to be primarily my problem as it is. Ughhhhh!!!

My 24 month old boy has been showing interest in going to the potty so we started pantsless yesterday. I prompted him every so often and sometimes he would sit and pee on the potty, but most of the time he peed on the floor.

Its day 2 and so far every pee has been on the floor and he has been splashing in it 😭 im not sure if he just isn't ready or if I should keep going to see if there's progress.

We cant stay home the whole day bc his big sister needs to be dropped off and picked up from school so we do pull ups and potty right before we leave and after we get there.

Im so proud of him when he does pee in the potty snd he can tell me that pee goes in the potty, but thats about as far as we've gotten when I dont promt him to sit.

Hey all, looking for honest and kind feedback! My daughter is 22 months old, she’s been consistently telling me she has to poop on the toilet and actually pooping on the toilet for well over a month now, pee has been 0 times and at a loss.

Tried again today, using bottomless method at home. (In past she’d just pee but not really care when I tried this method). She held it quite a while but finally let a little out, ran her to toilet and told her it’s okay if she had to finish going & read her books. She didn’t go which was fine; she helped me clean up the mess. Then a few minutes later she’s SCREAMING bloody murder, terrified. I admittedly didn’t put 2/2 together and think she had to pee… so held her asked what was wrong and out came the flood gates. She SCREAMED as if so terrified tho. I don’t want this experience to be scary or traumatic to her. She’s never acted this way in the past. She has no rash or UTI signs.

Is this a sign to put it on pause again for now- or is it a sign to keep going bottomless? I’m confused and conflicted because on one hand it shows she was aware she was about to go right before and obviously during but… her screaming like that.. like I said I don’t want her scared to go!
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My youngest child has always ran a little on the advanced side. At 13 months she has about 30 words, including some 2 and 3 word phrases, walks well, climbs up stairs on her own, and has started running, etc.

I was planning to start potty training between 18 months and 2, like I did with her older sister but recently she has been showing signs of readiness?

- She is curious about the potty and wants to follow her sister and I into the bathroom.

- She has begun taking off her diaper after she pees or if it feels at all bulky.

- Today she walked into the room where I was talking with my husband and anounced "poop" (a new word for her!). I checked her diaper, and sure enough she had pooped.

For context I'm a SAHM, so we have the flexibility schedule wise to potty train.

She has another week or so of ISR swim lessons. I was considering starting to potty train after that?

Any tips or thoughts for potty training that young?

We are on day 3 of “Oh Crap” method with a 20 months old. First day was hell. I almost gave up twice. But then by the end of the day something clicked for him and he said “pee”, approached the potty and peed in it. We are now about 50/50 between him initiating and us catching. Thinking about moving to “block 2” soon.

Curious to hear how others progressed at similar age?

Hey!
I want to start training my son who is 2.8 years old. He understands the pee and poo in potty idea but says “no
I’m not” and then laughs about it. He doesn’t go to daycare but will begin 2 days a week in September so that will help.

I want a balls to the wall approach. Is this letting him go commando all day? I have these training pants. But he is just peeing through them and doesn’t really recognize that he’s wet

Any strategies are welcomed.

My kiddo hust turned 4 and we aren't potty trained. We started potty training last November at his school. He was doing good at school, maybe an accident or two a week, but at home he was making 0 progress. 3+ accidents every time he got home. With me giving him potty breaks every 30-45 mins.

He would never tell me or teachers if he had to potty. He would just follow their potty schedule and i would try to keep it the same at home.

Then I had my baby in February and it became a huge power struggle at even the mention of potty. He wanted to be changed like a baby. At school, they even told me they had to stop potty training because it was becoming a huge all out tantrum everytime they tried to sit him on the potty. They also talked to him about telling the teachers if he has a feeling like he has to pee or poop and he purposely peed himself with a laugh to show her he understood but didn't want to use the potty.

Went to the doctor to talk to them and they told us to take a month or two break until things normalize. Well, not even 2 months after baby was born, we bought a house, moved and sent him to a new school.

Now things have normalized and I want to potty train again but idk how or what to do. He is 100% aware of potty training and will only sometimes sit on the potty if he has to poop.

They also put him in a class with older kids who are obviously all potty trained (as my kid should be) and hia teachers don't really want to do potty training.

Part of me thinks we should just do the oh crap! Method and see how it goes but I don't have any help so it's just be me cleaning up all messes and doing potty training while solo caring for my 4 year old and 6 month old.

I get it. I am weak and a horrible parent for my kid not being potty trained. He is so so so incredibly stubborn. My MIL who has potty trained 6 kids told me he is especially tough. I just don't even know what is motivating enough.

We started potty training my 2.5 year old a couple days ago. She will hold her pee until we either put a diaper on (for nap or bedtime) or she will hold it until she literally can’t hold it any longer and it bursts out of her. It’s day 3 and she’s only peed in the potty twice (both times she was screaming crying in pain on the toilet and she only peed in the potty because she couldn’t hold it anymore) and she’s had basically no accidents (only a couple dribbles here and there). And keep in mind she consumes a decent amount of liquids (milk and water). She just holds it and gets so uncomfortable and panics running around the house. It’s really hard to watch her be in so much pain from her bladder being so full. Is this a sign that she’s not ready? We have made no progress in 3 days. Not one intentional pee on the potty. I’m really worried she’s going to get a UTI from holding her pee so much. I don’t want to give up but I also feel like this is not normal. It’s making the potty very negative for her because I think she’s starting to associate it with being in pain from not peeing. How can we work on this? Is it just a matter of time and maybe we should try again in a few months?

After literally years of trying to potty train I'm putting my child (3) back into cloth diapers while we are at home. I am sick of the discussions. Pooping into the toilet works like a charm but pee accidents happen daily. Zero cooperation going to the potty. I'd rather wash cloth diapers again than pants. Rant over.

Help! My toddler is 3.5 and is fully potty trained at home. He wears a pull up at night time but never during the day or if we’re out in public BUT he just started daycare/preschool 4 months ago and he wasn’t fully potty trained so he was going in pull ups. I sent him for a few days in underwear but he had an accident so they put him back in pull ups and now they won’t let him go in underwear until he does a week of no peeing in the pull up.

The problem is he won’t stop peeing and pooping in the pull up. When he has underwear on he knows he needs to go to the toilet. We just did 11 days straight underwear / no accident while we were on vacation. But he went back to preschool yesterday and it’s back to peeing in his pull up there. I feel like them making him put the pull ups back on is hindering his progress. All of my friends daycares were very willing to support their kids with training! Help.

For more context, because my husband is in the military and we were stationed abroad. We had to move in with my MIL for an unforeseen timeframe (which we are now expecting it to be next March or April)

I'm trying to potty train my LO (2.5y) but MIL thinks it's too early and she frets more about her carpet and furniture than me trying to potty train her.

I would love to have her be naked but MIL won't allow it. The only other option is pull up or some sort of training underwear but I don't think it would help .

Any advice?

 know this may sound weird, but I need to know if we are the only parents experiencing this.

Potty training has not been going very well and for very long. She uses the toilet to pee, but she still needs a diaper to poop. she has maybe 2-3 pee accidents everyday.

About an hour (more or less) before my 3.5-year-old daughter needs to poop, she becomes extremely hyperactive and can display very challenging behaviour. She can become violent towards us and her baby sister, break things, become extremely active, and use bad language.

This can happen up to two or three times a day, and it is starting to affect our daily life. For example, we sometimes have to stop activities and go home when it happens because she basically cannot be around other people. She also refuses to poop anywhere except at home.

Has anyone else experienced something similar with their child?

Third child, second boy, 3 years old. We have run out of diapers before pay day a few times now. Each time, he is distraught and refuses to pee or go anywhere near the potty. Which results in holding it for hours, even over night, until he literally cant and pees all over himself which results in a massive meltdown. Right now I know he has to go, he held it all night and is doing the pee pee dance and is very irritable. He absolutely will not go near the potty. My first basically potty trained herself at 2 and my second is disabled and took until he was about 5 to become fully potty trained. So I am just at a loss here lol. I dont want him to get a UTI, clearly his body is ready but emotionally hes a mess about it and I dont know if its ok to keep encouraging the potty or if this is a wait it out thing 🫠

It all started 5 days ago when I thought it was time to start potty training my 2 years old (24 months). We took diapers off. Day 1 and 2 resulted in withholding both poop and pee for hours and mainly because of the urine withholding I decided to put the pull up diapers back on hoping it will ease off the pressure and maybe try again in a few months.
We are 3 days with diapers on and she is still withholding both. She keeps asking to go to the potty whenever she feels she is about to urinate but doesn’t want to urinate. Basically she is only urinating when she has to even in the diaper. Keeping it in only when she has no control over it anymore. Asking to be changed immediately after.

I have no idea how we came to this. I’m trying to normalize pee as much as possible. Saying pee came out. Never got angry at an accident. Always changed her after and cleaned calmly.

I’m at my wits end. I consulted a friend of mine who is a pediatrician and she didn’t really have anything to say about this.

Thinking both poop and pee withholding are probably connected I’m maintaining plenty of fluid intake and fiber rich foods. Even gave a dose of miralax. She is withholding to that poop like her life depends on it.

Not sure about keeping the pull ups on or what. She keeps asking for the toilet/potty.

Note- this is basically a repost from a post I mad at r/toddlers

Potty training 29 month old boy and following oh crap potty training blocks. Did/does well in block 1, bottomless. Introducing pants commando (block 2) and was having some accidents, and not telling us when he needs to go/if he had an accident. He needs help with clothing so it is necessary for him to tell us so we are able to help. I got a doll with removable pants to help model/roleplay with him....but, does he need more time in block 1 or focus on block 2? We are still very newly potty training, less than a week in. Some success with timed prompts. Also, he seems afraid to use the actual toilet with the seat reducer, he will say he wants to use the big potty when given an option but then doesn't want to sit on it for more than 2 seconds. Any advice is appreciated, learning along with him so it's a learning curve for everyone. ​

My 3yo potty trained last September at ago 2y2m. She took to it amazingly well and had been doing amazing. Very rarely had accidents and was able to tell us when she had to go or would go and sit on the potty all by herself. She only used pull ups at night. I was about to stop using pull ups altogether when all this started. Her baby sister arrived in November and we didnt have any issues then.

Unfortunately since about mid-May, we have gotten into a cycle where she would have some accidents, we'd get better, then the cycle would start all over again. We use a pull up a few days, give her lots of praise for using the potty, rewards, sticker chart, positive reinforcement, etc and it seems to work, but then she goes back to having accidents at random.

Its about a 3 week cycle. She also seems to have stopped recognizing body signals/communicating as she will have an accident, then tell me she has to pee. I have had her tested for a UTI and she has regular bowel movements daily.

We were doing well and then Saturday and sunday, she had an accident in her car seat. Both times she had gone potty beforehand and peed both times. Today, we were at Lowes, she peed on the ground, then told me she had to pee (she had just peed at the library an hour ago).

I'm about through. I try not to be disappointed in her when it happens, but its starting to show. I don't know if its linked to the pull ups, cause its summer cause she turned 3, if its her being defiant or taking control, or even related to her sister. I'm thinking about taking away pull ups completely and then having her do more of the cleaning up, etc when it happens. Is that the right move? I'm at a loss because she was so easy for so long, then had a regression.

LO is almost 2.5 years old. I initially tried when he just turned two, but I felt like an utter failure. It was a complete mess. I’ve since decided to just introduce him to the potty as a concept and let him be curious about it. Here and there I put him on the potty when he requests and we’d get a bit of pee, which would be exciting.

Finally bit the bullet after the sub was recommended to me and I saw how many people are encouraging naked time. Naked time as a concept is horrifying, but seeing as how many people suggested and recommend it and seeing how my little one seems to think that underwear are diapers, I figured to give it a go.

Today is day one we’ve had a few accidents, but we’ve also had a few pees and one poop!!! I’m really excited about the poop part because that means I don’t have to clean one off the floor 😂

TLDR: thanks to everyone in this sub encouraging potty training especially around this age. I do think him exploring and being curious about the potty before we started helped a lot at least with recognizing what the potty represents.

Started potty training our now 2yr 9month son in March before he started daycare. In the last 5 months he has been pretty consistently having no accidents 4-5 days a week and about 2 days a week he will have 3+ accidents per day. They do tend to be days when he is at daycare. But even after coming home he will continue having more accidents the rest of the day.

We use diapers at night, but otherwise its been cold turkey underwear only. Only exception was when he was staying the night at grandma and grandpa's 4th of July weekend and they put him in diapers leaving the house.

Just curious how to help him on these days he struggles or if its normal and expected?

Everything I’ve ever read says not to say poop and pee are gross because it will upset your kid while they’re potty training.

Meanwhile, my daughter demands to SEE her poop and pee, and gets so excited about it, and then shrieks “EWWWWW YUCKY” and cackles uncontrollably over it.

Bet you can guess how effective the bare bottom technique was 🫩