I’m realizing my bisexuality may work differently than I thought. Curious if other bi guys relate.
Something I’ve been realizing about myself:
With women, I’m usually attracted to who she is first.
Her vibe. Her personality. Her energy. Her confidence. How she makes me feel.
If she’s physically attractive too, that makes it even stronger.
With men, if I’m being completely honest, it usually starts much more physically.
I notice his body. His face. His masculinity. His ass. His bulge. Whatever the immediate “holy shit, that’s hot” trigger is.
Then if we click, the emotional side can grow from there.
For a long time, I assumed that meant my attraction to men was mostly sexual.
Like, cool, I like dick, male bodies, and sexual energy… but emotional connection? Probably not.
But I’ve realized that’s not actually true.
I can connect emotionally with men. I have.
It just doesn’t feel the same as it does with women.
With women, emotional connection feels more obvious and easier to recognize.
With men, it can feel different. More tied to trust, chemistry, comfort, admiration, closeness, shared energy… harder to label, but still real.
And now I’m wondering how many bi guys think they’re “only sexually into men” because the emotional connection doesn’t look the way they expect it to.
Like if it doesn’t feel like traditional romance, do we dismiss it?
Curious if this resonates with anyone else.
Do your attractions to men and women work differently, or is it pretty much the same for you?
Any other bi guys realize they had more emotional capacity for men than they originally thought?