I probably would.
Just for clarity .. I have never given a blowjob and have only gotten them from my wife for the past 30+ years.
I see people here all the time saying, "I'm not attracted to guys, but I want to suck a cock." I think I finally figured out why I feel that way.
When I go down on a woman, I enjoy it, but there's always some uncertainty. Did she orgasm? Was it good? I have to ask my wife, and part of me wonders if she's just being nice when she says yes.
But when she blows me, there's no ambiguity. I can start soft, get hard from what she's doing, and eventually cum. And there's physical proof that she got me there.
So I realized: I want to experience that from the other side. I want to take a soft cock, get it hard using only my skill, and then make a guy orgasm. I want to feel that certainty that I caused that involuntary reaction. And I want that physical evidence of my success.
I told my wife this and she said, "Yeah, it's awesome knowing there's nothing you can do about it. You're going to cum, and I know it was just me who did it."
Am I alone in this?
Update: Just to clarify .. I was commenting on the ambiguity of the female orgasm vs the male orgasm. I can generally tell when my wife has an orgasm .. usually I need to ask her how many times. But still .. it's not as obvious .. which is all I was trying to say.
Am I the weird for feel this way.....
In my early 20s I was a bottom/sub cub, (still am) and I only dated older guys (35+). That’s just what I was into and still am to this day. I just love the young old dynamic.
Now I’m 32 and I felt a crazy shift, everything feels flipped. The men I like and used to like me now are mostly chasing early 20s dudes, so I kind of feel like I aged out. Instead, younger guys keep hitting me up… and nothing personal but I’m not into it.
Last weekend I went on a date with a 26-year-old doctor. Really nice guy, smart, we had good chemistry. we even had sex but it felt so weird, and if it wasn't bad enough he started calling me “daddy”. I swear if i was a top my dick would go totally soft.
Am I crazy? Anyone else go through this? Like I've become vers while in relationships with men but I never felt as weird as that.
okay so there’s this one guy at my work who i think is so cute and seems very nice. he’s not incredibly handsome but i’m just drawn to his cute face still. then i met a girl today who i thought was very cute and very much my type. shorter than me, perky boobs, sweet. it’s not the first time but i’ll crush on both men and woman at the same time.
I have known this guy for twenty years. We are both widowed. A few years ago when my wife passed he was there for me. Him have had some sad and tender moments. We were both feeling vulnerable. Hugging led to arousal. We took physical comfort with each other. That led us down a strange and wonderful path.
His adult kid and grand kids are living with him. He will often come over to my house. I live alone. What started as hugs and petting has turned into intimate sex. He comes over and we get in this mood. We touch We kiss he gets on top of me.
Here is the thing. I don't look at him and think oh he is so sexy. I don't look at his lips and think his lips are beautiful. I do look at pretty women and feel aroused. I still want to kiss beautiful women. I don't know any but if I did. Years ago in my good old days, after my wife and I had sex. We would lay in bed naked. I'd look at her and think to myself how beautiful she was. Her and I would cuddle ourselves to sleep.
My friend Mike comes over. We get in this mood. It's intimate, it's sexy and I love it. But when we're spent it's over. Some times he showers before he goes home. But he always goes home. We don't cuddle for hours after. We haven't ever actually fallen asleep in the same bed.
Don't get me wrong. It's amazing. But I feel like I'm missing a femin touch.
Hi guys college girl here i’m sorry i just really need help. yes i posted this is a few other subreddits so please don’t crucify me if you’ve seen this already
To summarize, I found gay porn on my boyfriend’s phone. We had a conversation about it and he cried about it and talked about how he’s talked to men online sexually more times than he can count, but that some of them look like women and so it’s really not gay, and he blocks them when he’s done with them anyways so it doesn’t matter because they “aren’t real”. He also said it’s not a big deal because it’s not like he’d date a guy or anything. But that he “used” to be gay and although he’s still struggling, God is doing the work and I was sent by God to help him out with being straight. He also claimed he hasn’t talked to anyone sexually since we got together. (We’ve been together 4 months have not had sex yet)
However, There is also a really close friend he has (we will call him John) who he had a massive fallout with right before him and I started dating. Like the week he started to pursue me, him and his friend fell out. He refuses to talk about it, but he has a message asking that friend “are you into me” and when the friend said no he followed it up with “just joking haha”. But he was so emotionally attatched to this friend and still affected but him. It’s like this friends emotions determined my boyfriends emotions. even after the fallout, whenever they are in the same place my boyfriend stares in his direction constantly.
When they were friends, I noticed every hug that he had with the friend, his hands would linger on or above the friends waist for a few seconds after the hug. He even wrote him a big apology letter (that i didn’t read) to try to become friends with him again. Maybe this is jealousy but this has made me feel like im not enough for my boyfriend. This friend of his came to me before me and my boyfriend started dating (because we were all friends) and confided in me about how one night he had a pretty bad panic attack, and my boyfriend did a lot of back rubbing, arm tracing and hugging, and even attempted to cuddle him that night. John felt uncomfortable about it and didn’t know what to do. I told him i was pretty sure he was just trying to find ways to comfort him.
With this new information though, I see it differently. He has expressed missing John, and even reached out to John, and he is acting hot and cold towards John. It’s odd because apparently my boyfriend asked John for space and blamed it on his panic attack, and now he’s tryin to be in John’s life again. One day he is wanting to hangout and sending him reels and the other he is completely ignoring John. It’s like 5th grade stuff. I’m not sure what’s going on there. HOPING it’s just close friends with blurred boundaries.
I asked him about John and the answers are dancing around and not direct. His reasoning for acting wishy washy with john is that john is “too overwhelming to be around”. And that he asked John if he was into him because “John has trouble saying things some times and he was sad about something so i was just throwing guess out there, i didn’t mean it”
I’m really not sure what I should do. And my mind is mush.
Also, I do realize he could be bisexual or any other label, but he certainly isn’t as into me as originally thought
I remember the first time I saw it. One of my earliest gay porn viewing experiences. There was a guy on his knees just making love to a man’s bulge through his briefs. It wasn’t the robotic, doing this for a paycheck kind of act, this guy was fully into it, there was joy and enthusiasm as he kissed, licked and stroked this man’s penis and balls through the cotton of a well fitted pair of briefs. He wasn’t feminine, just a regular guy like me. I could see myself in his place face and mouth pressed against the warm cotton of a man’s underwear.
Over the years I started to accumulate my own collection, starting with Hanes and working up to Calvin Klein low rise hip briefs. My big hurdle at one point was changing into them in the gym locker room. What would the other guys think if they saw me sliding into these baby blue Nautica briefs? Turns out, no one cares. Was still a rush to change into them out in front of other guys for a while.
These days there’s still nothing that turns me on more than a guy in a well fitted pair of briefs, seeing the outline of his cock head and perfectly cupped balls through the fabric. The way they frame all of my favorite parts of a man, his cock, thighs and ass is perfect. I can see why some guys think they’re “gay” underwear. Put the right guy in a fitted tee and pair of briefs and I’m ready to take his last name! 😆 😘
My girlfriend (bi) and I have been living together for 2years. She's only been with me since we got together and has mentioned that her wild phase is behind her. I've been bi-curious for a while and it's getting stronger – I fantasize about a no-strings, unhinged night with a guy.
I'm torn. Part of me wants to just go for it discreetly, but I know that's risky and disrespectful. Another part hopes she'll be supportive because she's bi herself. Has anyone been in a similar spot? How did you bring it up? Did it go well, or did it create jealousy/problems? Any advice on opening things up safely, or is this just something I should sit on (or end the relationship over
I have trouble sticking up for myself, and also I feel unworthy to because I have been a flawed person. The past year I've been very depressed, often breaking down and feeling alone, unsure if I want to continue which is hard to put my boyfriend through.
However, the more I reflect in therapy, I wonder if I've been tolerating unfair treatment from him. A brief summary of his bad behaviors:
For a long time I thought I deserved all of this because I was lucky he overlooked my mental breakdowns, but now I am feeling I don't deserve it and it's not helping my mental health to be poorly treated by him.
Something I’ve been realizing about myself:
With women, I’m usually attracted to who she is first.
Her vibe. Her personality. Her energy. Her confidence. How she makes me feel.
If she’s physically attractive too, that makes it even stronger.
With men, if I’m being completely honest, it usually starts much more physically.
I notice his body. His face. His masculinity. His ass. His bulge. Whatever the immediate “holy shit, that’s hot” trigger is.
Then if we click, the emotional side can grow from there.
For a long time, I assumed that meant my attraction to men was mostly sexual.
Like, cool, I like dick, male bodies, and sexual energy… but emotional connection? Probably not.
But I’ve realized that’s not actually true.
I can connect emotionally with men. I have.
It just doesn’t feel the same as it does with women.
With women, emotional connection feels more obvious and easier to recognize.
With men, it can feel different. More tied to trust, chemistry, comfort, admiration, closeness, shared energy… harder to label, but still real.
And now I’m wondering how many bi guys think they’re “only sexually into men” because the emotional connection doesn’t look the way they expect it to.
Like if it doesn’t feel like traditional romance, do we dismiss it?
Curious if this resonates with anyone else.
Do your attractions to men and women work differently, or is it pretty much the same for you?
Any other bi guys realize they had more emotional capacity for men than they originally thought?
I'm binas well. His profile claims he wants a LTR but when I asked him what he was looking for he just said "as long as the guy is nice and attractive then I'm down for it".
I have the feeling he only wants sex. He hasn't asked me any questions to get to know me. I'm asking all the questions. Should I give him a chance ?
im not sure what like the end goal for coming out would be for me, its like i guess i want to tell people but also i feel like itll be awkward bc like its useless info to them. like no one would gain anything from knowing, but at the same time i see so many people coming out abt their sexuality and they seem really happy so im just not sure what the gameplan is there.
My new girlfriend and l can't wait to suck as many dicks together as we can. I think she's the one on so many levels. She's a keeper
I’ve hooked up with men since I was able to for so many years lol I can say when it came to me receiving oral I got the best blowjobs from bisexual men especially older bisexual men. Don’t get me wrong gay guys suck dick insanely well but bisexual men tho… it was always some of the best head I’ve ever had in my life. Many of the bi men sucked my dick without using their hands and even made me cum from just sucking me alone(no hands). Like damn that takes massive skill to do to be able to suck that long and know how to use your mouth in a way to make a guy like me cum so quickly and multiple times in a row(it’s very hard for me to cum tbh).
I’m a Latino in my mid 20’s and I’ve been with many older bisexual white men and man… they sucked the soul out of me lol I’ve also heard from women who have dated/had sex with bi men how they best oral they’ve ever had was from bisexual men. Which means bi men have been giving oral right to both women and men.
So ya I love bisexual men cause yall are the best and give the best head
I think we 'the Bi Community,' have been hoodwinked... bamboozled! I haven't been on this platform long but when I read posts on our bi communities, most of ya'll are drowning in some terrible guilt, shame and denial.
I think we've all heard the "well you're bisexual so you're obviously going to cheat" dumbass phrase, but it's actually sad how many of us are taking on the imposter syndrome and just casually rolling with it. Obviously our pallets are 100% wider than a monosexuals, but our integrity and loyalty is existing just like anyone else's.
Do you not think Straight Steve wants to have a MFFFF gangbang? But he's commited to his wife and goes home to her every night. Lucy the Lesbian often finds women chasing after her for her intelligence, attitude and charm; but her body and heart belong to one lucky lady. And Eve fancies the pants off Adam at her office. She's always looking but never touching, as she's in a commited relationship with her BF.
The point is, the terribly fictional monosexual characters above, whether straight, gay, lesbian, etc, all have sexual urges and emotional responses. Do they act on them? No. Because of commitment and the values around it. Do they beat themselves up because those urges or responses have crossed their mind? No. Because those feelings are just natural human biology. Have you never heard a monogamous monosexual publicly speak out and say someone was so attractive but they kept their cool and resisted the urge? Like actually congratulatorily patting themselves on the back for not cheating. Yet us bisexuals are here punishing ourselves in unimaginable ways for meerly having a thought about another person. The double standard that's placed upon us AND welcomed BY US is wild!
Is every straight man attracted to every woman on earth? Nope. Is every straight woman attracted to every man? Nooo. Is every gay man running after every man in this world? NO! So why do a number of bisexuals feel this is the case for themselves? And even worse, why do we accept a monosexual telling us how our sexuality works? It's bizarre!
And let's not get this post twisted; it's not for the bisexuals out there cheating on their partner and gaslighting themselves with the "I'm just exploring" or "I just needed to know so I tried it." The reality is you're EQUALLY as bad as any monosexual cheater. Not sure if you're a cheater? If you DID something WITH someone else and you feel challenged to tell your partner about it... Well, I'm sure you can guess where this is going.
The Straight Train has departed and regardless if you need to travel 1% or 99% of our beautiful journey, you need to ride this Bi Train! And whilst you wait for your train, you're welcome to sit in the Mono-Lounge. You're not a monosexual you say? No no no, this lounge isn't for monosexuals, it's for Monogamy! Because believe me when I say you can still have the perfect partner, the home built on love and the undying supporting ring of those church bells, if you wish! Anddddd if you'd prefer to have a meal before your journey, why not visit our delicious buffet? We're serving a delicious selection of just about everything; no pallet refused!
We're so busy listening to everyone else attempting to define us, we forgot to listen to ourselves. Close your eyes and ears and listen to your heart, your body and your gut; they will get you to where you need to be on our beautiful spectrum. We really are living the best of both worlds hmm? Enjoy your journey my bi bros and girlies x
I’ve had bisexual feelings all my life. Since puberty. Only been with women though because that’s how life turned out (the times and related stigma back then, etc). Wife knows about these feelings. She will even send me links to MMF porn she thinks I’d like.
Current situation: A longtime friend of my wife has been talking to her about how his wife has bisexual feelings and he thought my wife could be a safe person to play with. He is bisexual too. They even shared a picture of the wife and it was spectacular.
My wife is not openly bisexual but with her age is wildly open to new things and experiences. She even took a shot at getting a female friend to do lingerie pictures with her for me and her friend’s husband.
I know some people will be like he only wants to screw your wife. Well, he does. That’s ok. I’ve wanted to watch her have sex with another man for ages. The barrier was it has to be someone trusted.
Does the guy want to have sex with me? Also yes. He is down and so am I.
My thoughts are:
Anything else?
UPDATE: Discussion moving rather fast. Sent and received my first dick pic! He jerked off to the one I sent. So hot! Wives are talking.
I feel like that Joker quote… “Do I really look like a guy with a plan? You know what I am? I'm a dog chasing cars. I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caught it!”
Mine helps. During sex she actually suggests things for me to think about so that I could get more excited even though she can't produce a penis but she wishes she could just for me. Love that girl.
Hi there fellow bisexual men,
I (m 29) have a wonderfull partner (m28). We are nearly three years together now. Our communication is great, we love each other dearly and have great sex!
Untill now I was the one topping when it comes to anal sex. We were talking recently and decided that I would like trying to bottom for him sometime soon.
He is the first man I have been with and I dont have much experience in that area. His penis is also a good chunk bigger than mine.
I want us both to have a good time exploring and want to practice beforehand, either together or by myself.
Any advice would be greatly apreciated! Thank you
We exist.
I recently looked for online content about bi men in same sex relationships. There isn't much. I reached out to content creators, and 100% were surprised - like "Oh wow, that really isn't a topic covered" Not covered in the 5 years a channel has been operating and covering bi stuff. This happened with every creator I contacted.
When I search for 'Bi men in a same sex relationship" on YouTube the first suggestion is about bi men in straight appearing relationships.
So what happens, in my experience, is:
We center the needs of people with cishet partners. An unqualified "marriage" is assumed to be opposite sex/gender - that doesn't happen in any other queer spaces.
Conversations that dismiss or minimize same sex relationships are often unchallenged.
People in same sex relationships are dismissed, talked over, and when we bring up specific concerns or perspectives, we get ignored, or when challenging homophobic behavior within the community, we can be gaslit and called biphobic.
This isn't limited to bi men, I've had conversations with bi women in similar relationships with similar concerns. One bi woman in a LTR with her lesbian partner wondered if proximity to heterosexuality determines the social stratification within bi politics and organizing. I doubt it does, but the lack of content and attention to same sex relationships is real, and it doesn't help us as a community.
EDITED: For formatting and scads of typos.
Sexuality is mostly biological, but romance (excluding the sexual part) is a pure a social construct. So if you’re sexually attracted to someone but can’t imagine loving or dating them, why is that automatically treated as a natural orientation without considering the inevitable influence of society on our preference?
People don’t grow up in a vacuum. Shame, stigma, gender norms, fear of judgment, internalized homophobia, all of that shapes who we allow ourselves to love publicly.
If attraction is there physically, what exactly blocks the emotional part?
Curious how people distinguish genuine heteroromantic or homoromantic orientation in bisexual people from learned inhibition.