AITAH for not telling our mom my brother’s secret?
Hey y’all, needing some outsider input here. I 29F and my brother 35M have been super close since I was in college. We didnt really get along as kids but as we got older we knew we had that sibling bond of telling each other almost everything and supporting each other without scaring or upsetting our mom.
Well, my brother told me about a month ago that his first born kid turned out not to be his. He found this out through a medical test that was performed on the 2 year old as he was showing signs of a muscular and developmental delays. My brother had to do a DNA sample to see if any of his genes contributed to these delays. The doctor called him requesting that they need the “real father’s DNA sample.”
He told me this in confidence and asked me not to tell our family until he was ready. I know he was in shock, disbelief, and felt betrayed. He loves the 2 year old boy to death, and to be fair so do I. My nephew is my nephew, and it will always be that way. I told my brother countless times to tell either our mom or our step mom because this is a very traumatic event for my brother as the baby’s mother is highly verbally abusive, physically abusive, and financially abusive towards him- he literally only stayed with her for the kids.
Well, this week my brother decided to tell my mom. My mom then called and told my step mom, then my step mom told my dad. In my opinion, this is a great step forward for our family supporting him through this. Whether he wants to stay as his father, or not. I know my brother pretty well and I know he’s going to want to stay in the baby’s life- I just don’t know to what extent that looks like right now.
So, here’s where I think I may be the asshole. I got a call from my mom yesterday evening. She was very short with me so I asked her “what’s wrong?” Because at this point I didn’t know my brother told her the news. She said “(my name) you know damn well why I’m short with you. Your brother was struggling and pulling himself away from us for about a month now. How dare you not tell me and keep this a secret from me?!” The only thing I could say before she hung up the phone was “I honestly don’t think this is something that should have come from me..”
So, yall, AITAH for not telling my mom about my brother’s secret?