u/mentallyillgirlhood

I (F19) had a dream i was in the kitchen with my brother (M27), i saw a bee flying around and suddenly my brother falls as if he had a heart attack and i start screaming and crying my parents were aware but didnt have much of a reaction

i try to take his corpse to the back of my dad's car and drive to the hospital as soon as possible, i dont have a driver's license in real life

the doctors fail at reviving him and i just cry and scream

a female doctor with blonde hair smiles at me and hugs me as i cry into her shoulder, then gifts me an axe

f19, apologies for bad english, not native. I've had an obsession with "purity" and "being good" which i realize is kind of ruining my friendships or just general relationships

i thought it was just a character quirk but i realized its connected to my ocd (like most of my things, lol) also no i wasnt raised religious or anything or with parents that installed these ideas in me i just came into this world with these ideas pre-installed in me?

i can't have normal friendships with men even if its purely platonic if they engage in hookup culture, pay for SW go to strip clubs, sleep around a lot or etc i know realistically i will never date them or anything but for some reason i get some sort of panic that the person im interacting with is "impure" (i know its weird) and i need to get away

if i found out a person has ever cheated on a partner, even if they were young it just disgusts me to the core and fills me with anxiety like i need to shower after interacting with them. i found out someone who i was getting close with, that i could consider a friend was a homewrecker and she was pretty proud of it and kept telling me stories but i just felt a visceral reaction like my stomach was turning, i panicked so bad and stopped talking to her and was just scrubbing myself for hours until my skin was red. most normal people would either continue their friendship or slowly ghost while being unaffected i wish i was normal

i see posts on social media about "sneaky links" and it fills me with dread i had to delete twitter (no im not calling it X) due to the amount of sexual content and only fans ad bots under every post

i wish i could ignore them, idk why but it just makes me feel bad and i know the more i get into society the more i will see that stuff and i cant just run away because thats just how most modern normal people are and i need to learn to engage normally BUT I DONT KNOW HOW

apologies for bad english, not native((

most of social media now either strips your anonymity like facebook that requires your real name

instagram thats basically just you, your friends, your friends friends, your friends friends friends that follow you oh wait what?? 5 people that follow you and you follow them back go to the same school? DOXXED, MOTHERFUCKER!

twitter is fairly anonymous but to have any real engagement that isnt "stacy, only fans link in bio!" following you, you need to build connections and its basically "follow for follow, like for like. I HATE MINORITIES wow im gonna get so many elon bucks! stan this random industry plant!"

and then there is just the short form content farms, i dont need to say anything

reddit honestly has the best concept, its a semi modern forum website

none of those exist anymore except quoara which is basically old people displaying their kinks to everyone to see

its pretty active, has categories, most posts are text which is great you dont see it anymore in this age with short form content blasted on your face

but we cant have that

every single intelligence agency fucking KGB FSB mossad cia mustve came together and just migrated the most annoying, midwit people who suck at basically every aspect of life but yell about their IQ and useless overpriced american degrees that put them in debt because guess what they cant find a job but you know what they can do? thats right motherfucker, clock in at the reddit hq trademarked factory for your 9-5

requirements?

just think youre the smartest person in the world, have a mental disability (dosent matter real or fabricated) to weaponize, be deathly allergic to anything that isnt your exact opinion i mean literal allergic reaction fuming at the mouth type shit, try to make the same shitty jokes on every single post because you were always the kid whos joke was stolen and just said louder in school

be a male feminist that only cares about feminism when its about getting laid: oh, 50/50 cultures? sex work? hooking up culture? women being as sexual as possible while shaming more prude women? not getting married? not having kids? poly relationships where i dont have to take the emotional burden while chad takes my wife on dates and i get to fuck her sometimes? YES PLEASE! man im SOOO RIGETOUS

Also you must think America is the center of the world, anyone types with less than new york times level grammar or punctuation? hell yeah!!!!!!! its time to CORRECT and get that sweeeeeeeeeeeeet upvotessssss juiceeeeeeeeee

be gullible as fuck, ai posts and satire do not exist okay? everything on reddit is factual UNLESS IT OPPOSES YOUR POLITICAL OPINION THEN ITS SATIRE FAKE AND GAY I REPEAT FAKE AND GAY

also be illiterate and misread people's posts, i know its kinda in conflict with the whole im so smart requirement but you can make it work buddy and also you can NEVER EVER EVER BE WRONG UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, remember dude if you are wrong the universe fucking explodes or something idk but remember its never your fault pretend you were never outside for a single day in your life (you really dont have to pretend) someone says grass is green? ask them for proof, sources, expect them to write a research essay on WHY