Was I in a Cult?
I haven't seen many threads discussing this podcast, and those I have found are pretty dead, with not many comments.
I binged this podcast over the span of a month or so, and have been listening to weekly episodes since, so I have a lot of thoughts on it, but nobody to discuss it with.
I love reading biographies and hearing stories of people's personal lives, so I enjoy the subject matter a lot most of the time. There are quite a few episodes I've skipped, though, because there it focuses on abusive relationships or strange abusive circumstances that are...I mean, let's be real, not cults. At all.
For a show that is asks the question "was I in a cult?" I feel like there should be circumstances in which the answer is "no." And don't get me wrong, I would say all of these people were abused or mistreated on some level. I think reaching for words like "cult" make sense when in many cases these people struggled for years to describe and define the bizarre, traumatic situations they found themselves in, and big words like "cult" leave an impact on people. Describing your uniquely fucked up experiences as a cult gives the person listening the idea that what you went through was bizarre, traumatic, dangerous, and very serious.
So while I don't blame the victims for reaching for the closest word that gets their point across, I think it would be far more interesting for the podcast to explore what defines a cult, and how there are unique circumstances that may not be cults, but are equally traumatic, and may have cultish tones without being full blown cults.
But I think that there's maybe two reasons that the hosts avoid doing this.
- The most obvious issue I suspect is that they don't want to invalidate anyone's experiences. Here are people who spent years enduring abuse and trying to grapple with their experiences and define what they went through. And, after coming to terms with their experiences, they then are brave enough to tell the world about traumatic months and years — sometimes after having never spoken a word of it to anyone in their lives, fot fear of judgement/misunderstanding, or due to lack of vocabulary.
I do think think that this could be "solved" by acknowledging the storyteller's experiences as being traumatic, and treating their situation with the same respect and gravity as former cult members' stories. And applaud them for their bravery just the same, but have a conversation about what sets their experiences apart from a cult.
2. The other big reason...frankly I do not think Liz's experience counts as a cult. And I think acknowledging that some of the people claiming to have been in cults were not, in fact, in cults, would lead to her having to admit that her own experience wasn't quite a cult.
Anyway, I was wondering what you all think!