boyfriend has hsv 1
y’all i need some advice. i’ve been dating this guy since march. im 27 and he’s 32. he is by far the most amazing person i’ve ever met and nearly everything i’ve ever wanted in a partner - attractive, super intelligent, a gentleman, selfless, etc. the list goes on. he’s been the first guy who i’ve actually wondered could possibly be my future husband. i will say there are a few things that i am unsure about, but they are things we have to work through over time (e.g. i’m not sure if i want kids but he really does, a few religious belief differences, etc).
however, a few days ago, he told me he has herpes (hsv 1), and he had it since he was a child. i didn’t know ANYTHING about the virus when he first told me, so i got worried. i don’t have it and no one in my family does, but now i’m worried i will end up getting it and spreading it to my family.
i know the virus is extremely common, but i’m just shaken by the fact that once you catch it, it’s on your std tests for life. and i think about the stigma around herpes. i think about catching it, spreading it to my siblings, and then them possibly getting rejected from relationships due to having to disclose that they have herpes.
i wouldn’t end my relationship over just this, but this makes me wonder if my boyfriend and i should really speed up the talks about the things we need to work through so i can know if this relationship is really going to work long term (in that case, i wouldn’t worry so much about the virus).
for the people who don’t have hsv 1, what would y’all do given that this relationship is still very early?
edit: he told me he had this weeks ago during our std talk, but he said it was genetic because that’s what his family and his doctor told him. i didn’t know much about it, so i didn’t worry especially since he said it was genetic (my fault for not looking it up then). he now has a cold sore, and yesterday is when we had a more thorough conversation about it which caused me to realize it actually isn’t genetic and is contagious. i had no idea before