u/moop3306

Well, I made it.

There were MANY stumbles along the way, rehab, AA, too much damage to take stock of. 30k wasted, trust eroded, hard lessons learned.

Fuck Feel Free, this product is devious and gets its hooks deep into your mind and soul. It convinces you that you need it, you can’t survive without it, all the number of lies you tell yourself and the people that care about you.

Getting off is hard, really fucking hard. Especially if you were on a 10 a day habit like I was. But those first few days teach you about what you can endure. We are resilient, we don’t need this shitty poison to exist. That feeling like you want to die, and every part of your body is raging against you to just give in- that’s the start of healing.

So for everyone struggling, stick with it. It’s not easy and it’s definitely not a straight line. But a year later my life is so wildly different from where I was. I have hope again, I can find joy in the mundane. It took me 5-6 months before I felt almost back to normal, but every day gets a little better. Life is beautiful and worth living without Feel Free.

Hey, big shoutout to the new mods for getting the front page cleaned up. It was getting to the point where I had a hard time connecting on this subreddit with the content.

This sub was, and still is such a huge part of my sobriety and I owe quite a bit to it, and the folks here. Anyways, thanks for helping keep this a space where fellow Feel Free addicts can find a way to recover- with focused, substance specific insights and experiences!!

Genuinely feels like people are intentionally coming here and flooding the subreddit with stuff that has nothing to do with Feel Free. While I’m all for recovery from any substance, it seems weird that it’s all at once and every conceivable substance- not just the normal kratom 7OH.

Regardless 295 clean from Feel Free!

Feeling really solid compared to when I was in active addiction, took months to fully heal, I worry greatly about the new folks in here that claim to have gotten through it after a week or two of sobriety.

The hardest part, in my experience and from what I see from others, is the long term cessation. I had my own handful or relapses that eventually required me to do an outpatient rehab to really figure out what was going on. It wasn’t until 4 months in that I felt close to 100% and probably around 6-7 months when I really felt that final layer of brain fog lift.

I don’t say that to scare anyone off, each day away from Feel Free was worlds better than being on it- it just takes time and isn’t a straight line. Good luck to everyone going through it. Take the time to work on the why behind your use, don’t just stack days and call it good.

Man. I’m still in shock, I just doubled my salary and erased a lot of financial guilt for all the damage I did during my active addiction. Feeling very grateful for how far I’ve come. This definitely wouldn’t have been possible if I was still using.

100 more days until I’m at a year clean from a heavy habit of FF use.

Been a bit since I’ve checked in, life continues to be lifey. I’m working through my relationship with alcohol and trying to live a clean and reflective lifestyle.

For those of you that followed my journey- my dream job that fell through came back and is sending me an offer this week. Good things happen when you clean up!!