u/morenito222

Nothing is leaking from the ceiling and I live alone. The only explanation I can think of is that the night before I discovered them, a woman I met at a bar spent the night-so maybe she had something to do with it? She seemed pretty normal and when I asked her about it in the morning she said she had no idea. I ended up cleaning the screen with a spray I got from Best Buy.

Update:

The general consensus seems to be that these stains were of a certain bodily fluid. Since I’m the only male that lives in my house, I would remember doing that. So I’m gonna rule that out. The second most common answer is that the woman I brought home most certainly had something to do with it, despite her claiming innocence when I politely confronted her about it. That said, I’m gonna assume she is the culprit. The question remains though, what the hell did she do? Was it two very phlegmy coughs? Did she have a race with two snails while I was asleep? Was this the overspray of some personal care product of hers?

Update 2:

First off, I had no idea this was gonna blow up like it did. At the time of writing this, there’s been close to 700k views of this post. Definitley wasn’t expecting such a massive response. Anywho, I wanted to clear up a few things with the hopes that I can give y’all more clarity because a lot of the same questions are being asked in the comments. Also, people seem really invested in this lol.

-No, there have been no bats or birds in the house. I would have noticed that right away.

-This tv is in my living room, and the woman and I slept in my bedroom. In fact, we didn’t even come to the living room. We got to my place, grabbed some waters from the kitchen and went straight to my bedroom.

-I only have one pet, who is a neutered male cat. He has never climbed up on the tv before.

-Other than my cat, nobody else lives with me.

-To the best of my knowledge, there are no geckos or other amphibians roaming around my place, especially 20 stories high in a downtown, metropolitan area.

-Neither me, nor my guest were that drunk.

-If this is a bodily fluid, it’s not mine as I would have obviously known the source and not turned to Reddit for answers.

-No other males have been unsupervised in my house (my friends do come over but I would have probably noticed if one of them blew their load on my tv).

My cat, who is otherwise very well behaved seems to have fallen in love with this section of my velvet couch. So much so, that he feels the need to dig his claws into it when I’m not home. He has two scratching posts that he uses when I am home though. Clearly, he knows what he’s doing lol.

I don’t expect to be able to completely restore it to its original look. I just want it to look…better. Here’s what I’m thinking to do:

-Clean it with a fabric shaver and lint roller to get off all of the loose pieces.

-Steam and brush the area to blend the damaged fibers.

-Spray cat deterrent spray on this section regularly.

Any other suggestions?