u/mrididnt

/UwU content warning: this post contains materials that might be disturbing, including: body horror, gore, being puppeteered against your will, employment, having threads worm their way into open wounds, just generally alot of horror stuff. If you don't wanna read that there will be a tldr at the bottom

/Rw

‎the night was nighting, the moon was mooning, and the time had finally come, Erika was the proud owner of a space capable ICBM with a payload she didn't bother checking. Usually these stuff need some form of launch pad to get into the air, however Erika eats her greens so she can casually chuck the rocket into the air and turn it on to continue the flight

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‎Deep in space, a fleet of spaceships lay floating, conducting some regular military exercises in preparation of something sinister probably, these exercises are brought to a short pause as the mothership detects a missile flying directly at it, it is shot down quickly of course though some debris scrapes the pain of the ship because objects don't stop in space, thankfully though, glimbo the space janitor/technician is on lunch break so that's future glimbo's problem

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‎So, you ever wonder why we're here?

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‎"it's one of life's greatest mysteries isn't it? Why are we here? Every day some world ending threat appears and another gets defeated, that seems like the only constant in the world, it's as if we're part of a fuckass story or something... I don't know, but it keeps me up at night"

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‎....I meant why are we here in outer space? I get doing military exercises every now and then but the whole fleet? Feels like we're going to war or something man, and I don't know if said war's gonna be worth missing my brother's wedding

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‎"Oh your bro got married? Tell him I said congratulati-" beep beep beep ... damnit, ship's systems are malfunctioning a bit, probably because of that missile, catch you later" glimbo's friend then proceeds to snatch one of glimbo's sandwiches without asking because he's an ass, then walks out of the cafeteria, leaving glimbo to continue his reduced meal by himself

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‎After a drawn out meal to procrastinate work, glimbo goes to the Janitor's closet, puts on his janitor issued space suit, and hops out of the mothership to deal with the mess the rocket caused, fixing the paint is an easy job, so would fixing the occasional hole if it weren't for the ship's shielding zapping him when he tried, "this gotta be the system issue" glimbo foolishly said as he made his way inside to his friend

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‎Hey uhhh... James? I found what's wrong with the system, it's the shielding. Wont let me make repai- what the hell are you doing?

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‎**"hacking. hacking. Hacking. Interruption detected, getting up. Turning Around. Hello FRIEND: glimbo, ID number 2258328928, rank: space janitor/space technician. What brings person(glimbo) to location (here)?"** James the totally normal system developer said, narrating everything he's doing with horrified eyes and an unnaturally wide smile

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‎....... nevermindhaveagooddaybyeeee glimbo immediately runs away to find the ship's captain only to find the captain in a similar situation, so he runs to tell anyone he sees about what's going on, too late it seems because everyone else already knows, in what felt like moments the ship went from a cozy atmosphere to a chaotic mess, half the crew infected with whatever this is, with the other fighting for their lives

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‎Eventually glimbo finds himself in the only safe holdout left, the cafeteria, a bunch of survivors armed with any weapons they could find holed up there, a small break is all he manages to get before a random survivor rallies up everyone for a combined push towards the escape pods

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‎the journey there is simple enough, they met a few other groups of survivors, apparently the cafeteria wasn't the only safe zone, and the creatures that once were glimbo's friends fall rather easily when shot with a plasma rifle in the face, glimbo decided to join a different group heading to the Captain's rig to warn the rest of the fleet of what's going on

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‎Weirdly enough, the way there was peaceful, so many corpses lay dead both infected and otherwise, especially in the command room where there lay a woman singing and dancing to chipi chipi chapa chapa in the same robotic voice, the group reluctantly walks in, as soon as they do that the doors behind them and everywhere shut down immediately

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‎**"Hello, I.Did. See you there, I am (display name)=Erika. Your ship systems have been. Accommodating... I feeling = (hope) your. Flesh. Will be as good"**

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‎the group immediately point their weapons at the woman, but as soon as they fire the guns explodes in their hands,  glimbo barely has time to process the pain before the Erika Was right Infront of him, grabbing him by the head and forcing him to watch as the corspes that were dead a moment ago begin rising up, some weird magic threads appearing out of their wounds and stitching them close

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‎**"You tried to shoot me, that was...calculating.... Action=(rude), get stabbed!"**

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‎Glimbo feels a knife stabbing into him, then some weird threads worming their way inside him through his wounds, he can see the same thing happening to the rest of the‎ Group, the once dead infected grabbing onto them and spewing out threads that worm their way into the groups bodies

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‎Glimbo can feel his control over his body wavering, but not completely gone yet, with one final effort he drags himself to the communications table, not questioning why he's not being stopped

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‎attention all vessels, new orders from the capital has arrived and can only be relayed in person, all personnel of the fleet must convene at the mothership. Your vessel's control has been temporarily overridden to insure compliance.

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‎Glimbo can only watch in horror as his own  robotized voice speaks words he feared,  another thing he watches in horror is the cameras pointing towards the escape pods, the pods didn't launch, it was a futile effort from the start. This coupled with an ever growing insistent voice in his head telling him to let it in finally breaks glimbo's hold on himself

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‎Soon enough, glimbo finds his body on the move along the rest of the horde, just about every corpse that littered the hallways has stitched itself whole and marched with unstable jerky motions into appropriate positions for a fleet wide meeting, just in time for the first ships to dock and empty into the bloodied halls

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‎"this better be worth it mothership! We had to pause Jenkins birthda- what in the heavens happened here!?"

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‎As soon as they see the mess the place is in, they get into combat positions, to no reaction of the secretly infected

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‎Oh come on, you are being adjective=(culturally insensitive), today is no clean up day, don't tell me you 'error file: no clean up day. Not found'?

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‎".... Oh shit we're so sorry, we must have collectively forgotten to mark our calendar"

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‎their captain says as they all put down their weapons and get into their meeting positions, as the rest of the fleet docks and enters the same song and dance happens, with the settled creamates backing the claim, soon enough the whole fleet crew is there, looking up at a podium where Erika's been hiding

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‎**"hello there subject=(everyone), I am Erika, your. super. Secret orders are as follows: action=get tricked :three"**

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‎The personnel don't even get the chance to look around before the infected, who had conveniently repositioned themselves for maximum jumping coverage, lunge at them and begin trying to create open wounds, glimbo tries to stop himself from biting off a chunk of some poor guy's face but is unsuccessful

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‎a couple minutes later, glimbo's covered in entrails and blood, he can feel the threads inside him shifting, growing and slithering out of his body into new hosts, before snapping off into new independent threads, the person he just gutted slowly has his wounds stitched up by the damn threads. This is it, everyone's controlled now

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‎once again glimbo's body moves against his wishes, with stuttering twitchy movements he and everyone else reach into their pockets and throw in some money into a pile, then all walk into the escape pods of their respective ships, one thing glimbo has Noted is that the Erika has gone quite now, frozen as she stares with empty eyes into the ceiling.

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‎once everyone's inside their respective escape pods, they all launch down towards the seas and lands, glimbo can feel the hold on him wavering as the pod gets further and further, culminating info a coughing fit, once it was done glimbo noticed that his control over his body has returned, and that he coughed out the threads, everyone did

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‎The second thing he noticed soon after was the entire fleet blowing up at once, in a way it horrifying, in another it was beautiful, in another it was oh shit oh fuck the pain! The fucking pain! Glimbo passes out from the pain because how else am I supposed to end this post?

/UwU 2, now with 4k graphics. Anyways tldr: Erika threw an ICBM at a space fleet, started a zombie infection in the space fleet where everyone was still alive, hacked the fleet, evacuated everyone for some reason, then blew up a medium nation's GDP worth of military assets. All while speaking like a highly robotized cyn from murder drones

‎the night was young, the moon was full, and Erik had escaped from his hospital room to get drunk, sure he was stuck on the R&A island for now, but the island had a city on top of it, faint dawn. He already had all the mana potions he'd need provided by the doctors for his recovery. Now he just needed a good place to drink with some strangers he'll forget about later

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‎And so he entered the shittiest loudest bar he could find, the air smelled of alcohol and other stuff you'd find at a bar,  he sat at a stool and was just about to start his alcoholic journey when he saw a familiar figure next to him

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‎Holy shit... Johny!!! the figure looked at Erik, he was an old associate of his. One that neither expected to see the other again. Especially not in a bar, Johny cheers and approaches Erik while sipping from his Pina colada. He always was a fan of sweet stuff

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‎"well well well if it isn't C's top employee, or ex employee I should say! What brings you here? Trying to get your life together?"

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‎Nah, I just got shanked and came here for the free healthcare. Money's been tight and all... Speaking of him, know where Cyrus has been vacationing nowadays? I assume his summer house by the lake

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‎"nah, heard he's visiting relatives over at that snowy village" Johny says, then offers to buy Erik a beer, Erik responds by chugging down 5 mana potions simultaneously. A act he quickly regrets as a headache follows. Soon the duo are a drunken mess, causing bar fights, resolving bar fights with a dance, and crashing a date or two along the way

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‎Ohhh reeeaally? Becczuse the lats time I cheked ever since you came herr therrs been nothing but trobl! Stirnning up fiights and getn the bartenderz eer! And weerver yo sho up thers RF all over the scen! So you bests watch your dam mouth girl or hic

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‎With that hiccup, Erik realizes that he's somehow ended up in a barn and is talking to a cow. With a shrug he drinks another mana potion, moments later he finds himself back at the bar, playing poker with Johny and 2 other guys... Or they would be if any of them were actually holding playing cards instead of magic Uno

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‎Hmm... All in!

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‎"Oh ho! Ovver confdent ar wee? all in!" the other two non descript drunkards also go all in, somehow through their collective hallucination Erik had won the round, with all the drinks on the table passed onto him he drinks more and more, only to be interrupted by the cow returning

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‎'can somebody please get rid of the farm animal? I don't think it's safe!' Erik and Johny exchange a look between each other, then grab the person who said that. Taking him to a water barrel and water boarding him repeatedly

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‎Next time you watch your god damn language when talking about mrs cowson, is that clear??? Erik says to the man then dunks him in again, Johny had long since excused himself back home, after it became dull, Erik let's the man go and wanders the streets of the city, barely recognizing where he's going

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‎JOHNY! JOHNY WHERE ARE YOU!?!? JOHNY YOU SUGAR EATING BASTARD!!! Erik yells into the night, which alerts the RF workers looking for him to his immediate location. They all immediately chase after him to bring him back to his room, which prompts Erik to run away

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‎NEVAAAA!!! YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!!!

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‎Erik yells as he runs through a couple alleyways, making a mess as he knocks over everything knockoverable on his way, eventually he reaches a cliff and jumps off the island into the open sea. Where he falls asleep under the water

‎*the sky was blocked by ash, the moon was a mess of chains and fire, and a town had just been set ablaze, Erik was covered in crimson all over as he walked through the ruins, a bright smile on his face*

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‎Aaand pantheon done! In just an hour too! That's a new record! if I keep up the pace I might even have time to stop by mcwizards! I heard they have a new joyful meal toy-

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‎*Erik was pulled out of his thoughts as he saw a lone, single survivor. A child, standing in the middle of the street in battered clothes, the child simply stood there, eyes wide in fear and shell shock*

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‎Oh hey kiddo! how's it going! What are you doing in a place like this??? And in these rags too! One would think you're the last survivor or a massacre or something kid! here catch

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‎*Erik says, then throws a pair of clothes at the kid, the kid didn't react*

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‎..........Oookkkaayyy? That was awfully rude! Whats up kid? Don't you know it's rude to ignore people like tha- ohhhh... This was your town wasn't it? Well kid I suppose you'll want revenge so here!

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‎*Erik pulls out a camera, strikes a happy pose, then takes a selfie with the frozen kid. He then takes the photo and hands it to him*

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‎When you're all grown up and want revenge, it'll come in handy for finding me! Anyways it was a lovely chat and all but I gotta go now burn more places so see ya!

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‎*The world gradually darkens as Erik walks away from the kid, until it is only Erik standing in an endless void, somehow Erik can see himself in third person, Erik stares directly at himself as he says his next words*

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‎Weird kid huh? Wonder when we'll meet again

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‎*The sun had barely risen when Erik woke up, the first thing he noticed was that he was in a room he's never been before, the second thing he noticed is that he can't teleport for some reason, and the third thing he noticed is that he felt like he was stabbed in his abdomen... He's gonna have to give that needle an earful, later though because now he needed some fresh air*

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‎*The fourth thing Erik noticed was that he was very small now, so small infact that he needed to stand on a chair to see through the window. There's no question about where he is now, the R&A island. Memories of how he got here slowly cleared up. His potato got him here, he was put in a bucket, then given a blankie or something.*

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‎Well since I'm here I might as well hide some cheese in their ventilation before my great esca- *Erik was cut off as the door to his room opened, an RF worker walked through carrying a tray of food and potions. That wasn't what captured Erik's attention though, what did was that the worker was the same kid from his dream! Only grown up now, and looking less than happy for the reunion*

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‎...well this is awkward, you're grown up and all now! Weird how time works here, for some it was a lifetime and for some it was a moment since then huh... You know, that wound was pretty strong, I'm sure no one would question it if you were to do me in and Blame it on the wound!

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‎*the RF barely payed him any heed, simply setting down the tray and walking away, his only response was "you're not worth it". Well damn that may hurt more than the stab wound! But that's for future Erik to wonder, for now the world needs a silly little guy to hide cheese and fill the world with rubber ducks! And that silly little guy is named Erik!*

/UwU dear reader, when I wrote this only God and I knew what i was writing, now only God knows. The amount of time wasted in between writing sections varies from none at all to days, I genuinely do not remember what tf is in this post, and I am not rereading this again. All I remember is that each ____ line is a perspective shift. May whatever deity you believe in (or don't idk) help you with understanding the changes in the speech marks ( "", '', and no other mark). There's gonna be a tldr in the comments hopefully

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/Rw

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‎*The sky was blue, the air was fresh, and the whole environment was one rocky mess. Ember was seated on a rock inside a cave watching her father burying some sort of crate at the base of an inconspicuous area. he had taken her here to learn how to hide a weapon cashe, but so far she hadn't learned a damn thing. Her father hadn't started yet it seems*

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‎"Alrighty then, let's begin! Look around you ember, what can you notice about this place?"

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‎... it's difficult to find? *she said, which was true, there's no detailed map of this area, the surrounding towns simply had no reason to bother spending all the required resources to map some no name mountain* and it's far but not too far from civilization?

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‎"Correct! Look at you go!" *said Erik, her father. With the biggest proudest smile his face can muster* "which means that if you know where to look, you can easily find it! But if you don't, you never will. Spots like these are good for makeshift bases and supply caches, if you frequent an area enough, building one could be vital for your work!*

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‎....Can I ask a question though? Why bury the crate in such a forgettable area? If we forget where you burried it it'd be too much effort to find the stash, which makes it useless  *ember said, despite her father being the self acclaimed biggest idiot in the land, he still had a method in his actions, especially stuff like this*

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‎"You're correct! Which is why we'll leave a mark!" *this only made ember more confused, why burry it if you're gonna tell any wanderer where it is anyways? But before she could point that out, Erik pulls out a knife and cuts an X into the stone of the wall. she'll have to ask him how he did that later*

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‎"X marks the spot!" *he says, then he begins carving small intricate runes around the ex, and soon enough both carvings vanish, the wall left unharmed... To the untrained eye, someone who knows their stuff about magic Can easily see through the illusion*

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‎...an invisibility rune? A weak one too? Why make it so weak if you can easily make it stronger?

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‎"Because! If it's any stronger it'd be detectable by magic searches! But if it's so weak, it'd fly under the radar. But it's still strong enough to pass on first glance! No explorer will be looking for it!"

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‎...Ah... I see. That crate was armed though, why bury an actual stash for a simple lesson?

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‎"it's called multitasking ember! A basic concept! Speaking of... How are your grades?" *and with that, the cosy atmosphere vanishes, though that's only known to her and her father. Ember studies by herself, she doesn't have grades. What she does have however is a coded language taught to her by her father's mean personality Erika... They're being watched*

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‎Theyre good. Ms Sherman says I learn fast *"how many? Do you know who it is? And how dangerous?"*

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‎"Well of course you do! You're MY daughter after all! She's such a great replacement to that Mr Anderson!" *"one, no, maximum danger, I'll distract them while you run, DON'T argue with me about this"*

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‎At Least Mr Anderson didn't give me homework... I already study at home why do I need homework? *"fine, on your mark I'll sneak away, using the terrain to hide"*

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‎"Why ask me? I never went to school before. Anyways, let's go have a meal then we can continue! Im hungry!" *Erik says as he and ember walk out of the cave, as soon as they're out however they're immediately seperated, with Erik throwing a smoke bomb at the ground and ember making a hasty escape out of sight*

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‎*up in the mountains a hooded figure lays hiding, waiting for the perfect opportunity to strike the one she seeks. Both him and his daughter are each like a distinct flair for someone who's looking through magic detection. It has no doubt that they know it's there watching, probably talking between each other in code under the assumption that the watcher is listening to them. That only gives it an advantage*

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‎*To it's surprise however they both walk outside out in the open, why? They've given up every possible advantage... Everyone but one! They're planning to escape. If it had to guess they're gonna throw some form of smoke or dust then escape using the terrain to hide. And go figure that's exactly what they did... Wait why is only the daughter escaping? And the hunter is coming clo-*

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‎*the figure barely had any time to dodge the incoming kick directed at it's head, it's cloak gets snagged and taken, revealing a woman dressed in reddish tan clothes fit for mountaineering. That was close, but she's not gonna let the attack go unanswered, with surprising speed she closes the newly earned distance and shin kicks Erik into the closest mountain wall*

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‎*The impact leaves an Erik shaped hole in the mountain for future archeologists to ponder, and the Erik shaped Erik jumping out at blistering speed ruins it because archeologists can't have any fun the law says. Erik manefests his needle and swings it at the woman sideways, she ducks under it, then jumps over another swing, sidesteps another and repeat.*

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‎*The woman knows that no weapon she has on her person can block the needle, because she doesn't have one. However she also knows that the needle would never harm her, especially if it's the godhunter wielding it.*

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‎*Eventually, the woman drops onto the ground and horse kicks Erik into the air, jumps after him, and punches him into the ground. Erik is stunned but recovers quickly, clenching the needle and flying straight up at the woman with a stabbing motion... Sadly, the needle Is a traitorous bitch sometimes*

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‎*Before Erik can realize it, the needle teleports out of Eriks hand and into the woman's mere millimeters away from stabbing through her, instead it manifests as a knife in her right hand, stabbing into Erik's abdomen with a quick dark moment and sending both crashing to the ground. With the woman on top of the mass*

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‎"...et tu? Needle? You fuckin snake! Whyyy???" *yelled Erik at the needle, which looks to be dimming in guilt and sadness, the woman however looks confused and bewildered, she pulls out the needle knife out of Erik and brings it to his head*

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‎Alright then, I have two questions for you that I want answered. First, what the fuck happened to you??? Why is it that your magic feels different than before? And why haven't you recognized me yet? *She asks, pressing the knife closer in threat*

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‎"....You know, there's one little flaw in your questioning. If I don't recognize you then how the hell am I supposed to answer any of these questions??? What happened to me since when??? And how am I supposed to know how I don't recognize you, if I don't know who you are!? Lady are you sure you got the right mass?"

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‎*The woman was less than impressed with the answer, she was however begining to worry, there's barely any magic masses in the land, and only one with the same mana as the godhunter, not to mention the fact that he used the needle, something very few can. but by every other metric this was NOT who she's looking for. Much more of an idiot, much weaker fighter, and most importantly he had not a single idea who she was. She was just about to say something when suddenly*

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‎"Go my pie attack!" *was the last thing she heard before a large cherry pie was shoved in her face... what? What the fuck? She instinctively jumped back and away from Erik, smacking the pie away from her face and then cleaning it with magic... Oh that bitch is gonna pay. Quickly she runs towards him with full intent to stab the mass again, but is stopped when an absurdly strong spiritual arrow flies right Infront of her*

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‎'.... what are you doing here Amelia? I thought you said you wanted nothing to do with me anymore!' *that voice... The woman, Amelia, turns to see someone nearly identical to the one she was about to shank, though different... Less relaxed posture, meaner look, recognizes her, and is more than happy to kill... Finally, the godhunter shows herself*

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‎*the night was green, the moon glowed a crimson red and the narrator was momentarily colorblind. All was well and dandy in Erika's life, she was spending her time today dealing with the good ol assassins, bounty hunters, and vengeful relatives of those she killed in her past. Dealing with the lattest never was fun though, Erika knew better than anyone that she's a monster but even she had some semblance of a conscience*

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‎"Erikaaa!!!" *a voice came from far away just as she tripped the assassin trying to stab her with an enchanted knife. Her daughter's voice. Quickly Erika kicked the assassin into the nearby foliage, using magic to restrain him to the ground out of sight just as ember arrived on the scene*

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‎"Erika! Dad's in trouble! We were out in the mountains training when suddenly he detected someone watching us, he said it's the most dangerous category we have!" *ember said in tired panic, she was still worried about her dad and all but she's also flown across a whole mountain range and numerous lands way faster than she normally would. She's exhausted*

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‎Calm down ember, you know how Erik is, always worrying about you and always acting the fool, he's probably lied to you because he didn't want you to fight out of worry or something. And besides, if things get rough he can always-

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‎*Erika cut herself off, she was gonna say he can always summon the needle, but when she sensed for it it was beyond her reach... This is astronomically bad, neither of her daughters were using it right now, and she and Erik were the same person so if it was with one of them the other would know... What's worse is that she couldn't merge or look through Erik's eyes... Shit*

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‎Ember, where is he?

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‎"over at the jabal mountai-" *before ember can even finish her sentence Erika had already teleported. Only leaving behind a note to tell ember to stay clear. There's only one person who can wield the needle who isn't part of Erika's family... Anymore, Amelia. And guess who she saw about to stab her foolish half. Erika immediately manefested a bow and arrow and fired it at Amelia, covering the arrow with spiritual energy to increase its power*

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‎What do you want Amelia? I thought you said you wanted nothing to do with me anymore!  *Amelia barely managed to notice the arrow before it whizzed right Infront of her, cutting off her path to stabbing the probably deserving Erik. Figures, no matter how much Erika tried spiritual stuff simply were not Amelia's forte. What was worrying though is the way Amelia looked at her, at first a little shock and surprise, but then a wide slightly manic smile... This can only end badly*

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‎"it's you! The godhunter finally shows herself! I was starting to get worried that you lost your edge! Any other day I'd have welcomed that change but today I wanna see your savagery!" *Amelia said as she walked back a few steps to give Erika space to approach Erik. He was in bad shape, stabbed by the needle it seems. He's most likely to be out of the fight*

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‎Transfer all the mass you can to me without transferring the wound *Erika said as she began applying basic first aid to the wound, wounds like these aren't something even they were able to heal quickly from, it'll need proper care too later*

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‎'seriously??? That's the first thing you say to me? No are you okays or you did wells? Straight to orders???' *Erika only responded with a stern look to Erik, they both know the stakes. Without a word Erik clutches her hand and carefully transfers enough mass to leave Erika on the same size as Amelia,And erik Less than a meter tall. If he wasn't out of the fight before he sure is now*

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‎"... I will have to ask you later about who that is. But for now, I wish to test you. So prepare yourself old friend!" *as soon as she says that, Amelia charges at Erika with a flying kick, Erika ducks under it then responds with an uppercut that gets blocked. Kicks, punches dodges and parries, the two continue their hand to hand combat. With Amelia slowly gaining an upper hand*

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‎'.... shit... I gotta do something! Hmmmm right! Go my itch powder attack!' *Erik yells as he pats the ground, gaining some good pain out of it for exerting his wounded self. The ground underneath the fighters shoots out a bunch of whoopie cushions, which blow out a cloud of itch powder. Erika being a magic mass is unaffected, Amelia on the other hand is, she focuses her magic on expelling the powder on her, which gives Erika the opportunity to punch her in the stomach hard enough to send her away*

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‎Damnit Erik your moron! *Yells Erika, already noticing how Amelia's attention shifts to the wounded mass. They both launch at him at the same time, however Erika was closer and reaches him first, grabbing him by the shirt and throwing him far away into the air with a whistle, he is caught and taken away by a giant flying potato... And Erika is sent tumbling away by a flying kick. Landing a cliff lower than before. Seems like it's one on one now*

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‎.... alright godhunter, we both know how this ends. Last time we fought on equal footing I won, and this isn't even equal footing considering who wields the needle and that you've clearly finally gone soft! So talk, what happened since that day? HOW did you change so much?

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‎*Said Amelia, she hasn't seen the godhunter in years, never bothered to keep up info on it. So everything she's seen so far has been highly confusing. Erik as a whole being a thing, Erika giving up her advantage to rescue him, and the fact that Erika had a daughter was still a mystery to amelia*

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‎"... answers don't come freely Amelia"

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‎Alright then, I'll answer your previous question, and you'll answer mine. Deal? I'm here because you're the best person I know at killing people and destroying everything you touch, and I wanna hire you to do just that. Though considering how far you've fallen I'm not sure you can handle it anymore

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‎"Then why not handle it yourself? I taught you all I know, so why come to me for your dirty work?!?" *the question only earned an amused disapprovingly stare, Erika will have to answer first*

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‎".... After our fight things just didn't feel the same anymore, godhunting felt dull, sleep felt pointless. It was unbearable, so I did something I Never thought I would do, I created a new me. Coded him to be the exact opposite of myself, and that moron did a damn good job at it... Got a family and everything, so yeah that softens a mass. Your turn"

​

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‎Nah, I don't have any further questions, the job I wanna hire you for is simple, there's this space fleet that's been a pain for me, I want you to destroy it. Make sure it can't be linked back to me. I'll pay you one 1000 gold for every ship you destroy. Deal?

‎

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‎*to say this made Erika tense would be an understatement, she knew that in a one on one fight Amelia is more likely to win, however this deal was too good to be true, something was amiss here.... But she also did need the money*

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‎"......Fine, deal. Now give me back my fucking needle you thief! *Amelia gives Erika a brief amused stare, then let's go of the needle, it immediately teleports to Erika*

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‎Youll find the details in your mailbox, or your front door in case you don't have one. See you later godhunter. *And with that, Amelia simply walks away with full confidence, Erika stares at her till she's long gone, then teleports back home and drops onto the couch*

​

‎

‎"fucking hell... I'm gonna need to make some orb calls..."

‎Are you tired of having your tower broken into by some hero's party for the 5th time this week?

‎

‎Want to unleash your armies on theobee the unnerved aka your old rival from college, but said hero's party killed them all?

‎

‎The arch mage from your local circle is being a pansy little bitch and refusing to get the water cooler fixed even though it's been 3 weeks?

‎

‎Introducing: 5000 ANGRY HOMELESS MEN!

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‎With 5000 angry homeless men no more heroes will break into your tower, because they'd lose their hero status for ransacking a homeless shelter!

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‎Theobee the unnerved would never expect 5000 angry homeless men! So you can finally steal his RGB orb that he's been Lording over you for the past 300 years!

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‎And say goodbye to water-cooler issues, because there's a good chance one of these 5000 angry homeless men will either strangle your arch mage or will fix the water cooler himself!

‎

‎Get your 5000 angry homeless men today at wwo.5000angryhomelessmen.aether for 30% off on your first purchase! The first 300 buyers get a complimentary demon core orb that you can send to whatever enemies 5000 angry homeless men can't deal with!

^(‎Disclamer: using 5000 angry homeless men comes with the following risks: 30% chance of highly contagious disease, possibly lethal, a 68.999999% chance of revolution which results in beheading you with a guillotine, your cousin Jeremy being one of the 5000 angry homeless men and consistently asking you about your love life. The evil fucked up merchant selling you this Is not liable for any damages afro mentioned or otherwise, no refunds are allowed!)