u/musclecactus26

Help me find an open minded Imam

Hello everyone.

I am a 26 year old muslim guy in a committed long-term relationship with a white non-muslim girl. We are both financially stable, she lives alone and I still live with my parents. I have brought the topic up about marriage to my parents numerous times so that myself and my partner can fully live our lives together without having the stress of my parents constantly on my back. It has been met with quite a bit of backlash from them and they are constantly delaying/pushing back when I can get it done and it has led to plenty of frustration from us both.

I am trying to find a respectful, open minded Imam (who has experience in interfaith/interracial relationships) in Cape Town/Southern suburbs, who could perhaps talk to us and help us navigate this situation as well as talk with my parents. My parents don't really want to go through with it because they fear family judgment and all that nonsense. All we really want to do is a small nikkah so that we can be halal and go about our lives. I am happy for my parents to tell the rest of my family when they are ready, and even have a whole other nikkah for the family later down the line, however I find it a bit unfair that they won't compromise and make life easier for me.

If anybody has been in a similar situation please reach out, along with any information on the imam you used/spoke to for guidance and to perform the nikkah. Thank you.

Hello everyone.

I am a 26 year old muslim guy in a committed long-term relationship with a white non-muslim girl. We are both financially stable, she lives alone and I still live with my parents. I have brought the topic up about marriage to my parents numerous times so that myself and my partner can fully live our lives together without having the stress of my parents constantly on my back. It has been met with quite a bit of backlash from them and they are constantly delaying/pushing back when I can get it done and it has led to plenty of frustration from us both.

I am trying to find a respectful, open minded Imam (who has experience in interfaith/interracial relationships) in Cape Town/Southern suburbs, who could perhaps talk to us and help us navigate this situation as well as talk with my parents. My parents don't really want to go through with it because they fear family judgment and all that nonsense. All we really want to do is a small nikkah so that we can be halal and go about our lives. I am happy for my parents to tell the rest of my family when they are ready, and even have a whole other nikkah for the family later down the line, however I find it a bit unfair that they won't compromise and make life easier for me.

If anybody has been in a similar situation please reach out, along with any information on the imam you used/spoke to for guidance and to perform the nikkah. Thank you.

Hi all,

So as the title suggests, I am looking for some social football in the southern suburbs (near Claremont/rondebosch)

I would like to a join a club, but emphasis on social. I really just want to use it as a means of making new friends and connections while blowing off some steam. I am a decent player but haven't played in years so I am quite rusty. So I would like something where I can play frequent 11 a side games and attend practice, but I dont want it to be like a proper commitment as my schedule is intense. I just want it to be for fun and vibes when i can make it. I would also like something that has the option of progressing to more competitive when I feel comfortable with it. Open to any suggestions, I am 26 years old.

Hello all!

I am M25 from Cape Town, I have lived here my whole life, school, university etc, yet I find myself at this stage in my life where I don't have any real genuine friends/connections. I have friends from school but we never talk on a deeper level or have actual conversations, it is always very surface level and we never really hang out either (maybe twice a year at most). It is genuinely kinda sad and I know it is partially my fault for lack of effort too, but I also feel like I have just always been very unlucky in that regard. I have an amazing partner who over the past year made so many new connections and has met people who have genuinely made such an amazing positive impact in her life (she is quite extroverted so I don't think I can use the same methods as her). But it has made me a little jealous in a sense that I wish I also had some really genuine people in my life who I can turn to for advice, share exciting news about my life with, or celebrate cool things they have done in theirs!

So here is a little about me: I am 25 turning 26 this year. I have just completed my masters degree at UCT with a distinction (yay me!). I am currently working in century city but I stay in the southern suburbs (close to UCT). Some interesting things about me: I am really into gym, health and fitness (I have slacked off a bit this year but I still go 4x a week to get my free smoothie haha), I am a huge football fan ( I support Liverpool so the less said about that this year the better, but I keep track of all the leagues and would love to do some watch alongs during the world cup) and I would love to find some people to play with, I am also into F1 and recently UFC (I also vaguely follow WWE, I used to watch it loads as a kid growing up but not anymore). I used to be really big on video games (competitively) but I don't have time (or energy) to play much anymore and no games are really appealing to me, loved playing CoD but not anymore (now I will just rant about how they ruined the franchise), used to be into FIFA, but now I find myself more into casual immersive singleplayer games like GoW (my favourite franchise), Rockstar games, survival games like ARK and minecraft, need for speed (back in the days), uncharted etc. I am a big nature fan, love being outdoors, hiking, I love animals, observing their behaviours and just learning about them (I have had so many pets and currently have 2 cats) and also just learning about natural history too (I am a huge dinosaur and prehistoric nerd and Jurassic park is my favourite movie franchise). I enjoy travelling quite a bit, I have only explored Asia mainly but plan to do a lot more countries as I get older and my finances up, learning about new cultures, trying new cuisines and sightseeing are some of my favourite things to do overseas. In terms of TV shows, I'm not that big of a watcher, I am really selective and have only watched a handful of shows but currently I am a HUGE invincible fan and would love to find someone who is into it to so that I can discuss episodes with them. I'm watching the boys and this show called from too which I really enjoy but other than that nothing really. I am here and there on YouTube, I keep track of like celeb stories or influencer drama (It is really beneath me but I find it so entertaining so whatever). Another thing to mention is that I am really trying to get out of the system of a 9-5 job and I am actively exploring ways to earn a living while working for myself, so I would love to brain storm with someone.

Anyway that is kind of all the interesting things I can say at the top of my head, there might be more but I guess you can find that out. So I would love to connect with people, all ages, races, sexes etc, whether you have things in common with me or you just think we would be able to have a nice conversation! I am a big texter and would prefer to get to know someone online first to get comfortable and get to know them. I am open to a fully online friendship but also don't mine eventually meeting up and seeing if we actually do vibe. I want people who are very understanding and chilled too, like we don't have to chat all the time, we don't even need to meet all the time either, just having check ins and being able to meet every now and then for coffee or something would be really sweet! Anyway my DMs are open and hopefully this finds the right people. I am also open to finding groups I can join or even WhatsApp chats.

Thank you for reading!

Okay so my previous post got deleted as it went against the rules (I am sorry, I was unaware), so hopefully this one is better!

People in Cape Town, how are you actually building meaningful social circles after university?

I’m 25, from the Southern Suburbs, and recently finished my master’s degree at UCT. Something I’ve been struggling with lately is realising how difficult it is to maintain or build genuine friendships once university ends and full-time work starts.

I still have friends from school/university, but most of those relationships have naturally become very surface-level over time. Everyone is busy, tired, working, in relationships, or just doing their own thing. It feels like adult life suddenly becomes very isolated without anyone warning you about it.

What made me think about this even more is seeing how differently extroverted people seem to experience Cape Town socially. My partner has made so many incredible new connections over the past year through hobbies, mutuals, events, etc., while I’ve always been more introverted and struggle to naturally insert myself into new social spaces.

So I wanted to ask other Capetonians in their 20s:

• Is this a common experience here?
• How are people actually meeting genuine friends after varsity?
• What hobbies/clubs/communities in Cape Town have genuinely worked for you?
• Do people mostly make friends through work nowadays?
• Is Cape Town socially cliquey, or is this just what adult life becomes?

For context, my interests are mostly gym/fitness, football, F1, hiking, gaming, travelling, nature, and generally being outdoors.

Would appreciate hearing other people’s experiences or advice because this feels like a surprisingly common issue that nobody really talks about.

(I made a longer post on my profile with a bit more context about myself/interests in case that helps frame where I’m coming from. The main thing I’m looking for here though is genuinely just advice and insight from other Capetonians who’ve experienced something similar.)

Hello all!

I am M25 from Cape Town, I have lived here my whole life, school, university etc, yet I find myself at this stage in my life where I don't have any real genuine friends/connections. I have friends from school but we never talk on a deeper level or have actual conversations, it is always very surface level and we never really hang out either (maybe twice a year at most). It is genuinely kinda sad and I know it is partially my fault for lack of effort too, but I also feel like I have just always been very unlucky in that regard. I have an amazing partner who over the past year made so many new connections and has met people who have genuinely made such an amazing positive impact in her life (she is quite extroverted so I don't think I can use the same methods as her). But it has made me a little jealous in a sense that I wish I also had some really genuine people in my life who I can turn to for advice, share exciting news about my life with, or celebrate cool things they have done in theirs!

So here is a little about me: I am 25 turning 26 this year. I have just completed my masters degree at UCT with a distinction (yay me!). I am currently working in century city but I stay in the southern suburbs (close to UCT). Some interesting things about me: I am really into gym, health and fitness (I have slacked off a bit this year but I still go 4x a week to get my free smoothie haha), I am a huge football fan ( I support Liverpool so the less said about that this year the better, but I keep track of all the leagues and would love to do some watch alongs during the world cup) and I would love to find some people to play with, I am also into F1 and recently UFC (I also vaguely follow WWE, I used to watch it loads as a kid growing up but not anymore). I used to be really big on video games (competitively) but I don't have time (or energy) to play much anymore and no games are really appealing to me, loved playing CoD but not anymore (now I will just rant about how they ruined the franchise), used to be into FIFA, but now I find myself more into casual immersive singleplayer games like GoW (my favourite franchise), Rockstar games, survival games like ARK and minecraft, need for speed (back in the days), uncharted etc. I am a big nature fan, love being outdoors, hiking, I love animals, observing their behaviours and just learning about them (I have had so many pets and currently have 2 cats) and also just learning about natural history too (I am a huge dinosaur and prehistoric nerd and Jurassic park is my favourite movie franchise). I enjoy travelling quite a bit, I have only explored Asia mainly but plan to do a lot more countries as I get older and my finances up, learning about new cultures, trying new cuisines and sightseeing are some of my favourite things to do overseas. In terms of TV shows, I'm not that big of a watcher, I am really selective and have only watched a handful of shows but currently I am a HUGE invincible fan and would love to find someone who is into it to so that I can discuss episodes with them. I'm watching the boys and this show called from too which I really enjoy but other than that nothing really. I am here and there on YouTube, I keep track of like celeb stories or influencer drama (It is really beneath me but I find it so entertaining so whatever). Another thing to mention is that I am really trying to get out of the system of a 9-5 job and I am actively exploring ways to earn a living while working for myself, so I would love to brain storm with someone.

Anyway that is kind of all the interesting things I can say at the top of my head, there might be more but I guess you can find that out. So I would love to connect with people, all ages, races, sexes etc, whether you have things in common with me or you just think we would be able to have a nice conversation! I am a big texter and would prefer to get to know someone online first to get comfortable and get to know them. I am open to a fully online friendship but also don't mine eventually meeting up and seeing if we actually do vibe. I want people who are very understanding and chilled too, like we don't have to chat all the time, we don't even need to meet all the time either, just having check ins and being able to meet every now and then for coffee or something would be really sweet! Anyway my DMs are open and hopefully this finds the right people. I am also open to finding groups I can join or even WhatsApp chats.

Thank you for reading!