u/nekocxrpse

ok, stupid question i know, and i didn’t really know what flair to use so i just picked advice as the best fitting one. i already know the terms “sapphic” and “lesbian” are actually two different things and that bisexual women are definitely included in the technical definition of sapphic, but i still can’t help but feel a teensyyy bit cautious about having merch with the sapphic flag included because of the very common perception or assumption that it’s mostly or only associated with lesbians and lesbianism, and that i don’t want to seem like im giving…”false information” or anything like that. i will say that i do really like the sapphic flag, i think it’s so cute and pretty and like how it basically just means any woman who loves women. this doesn’t mean i don’t like nor want to have/use the bisexual flag, as that mainly represents who i am of course, but i just also feel a connection towards the sapphic one, i guess because of my heavy sapphic lean.

it feels and seems like when it comes to bisexual women, our attraction to women is something that’s often very highly debated, scrutinized, and the target of high suspicion. it’s like we have to actually post a video of ourselves having sex with women as legitimate proof, or date a million women as legitimate proof, or have had multiple long-term relationships with women as legitimate proof, but even all of that probably still wouldn’t be enough. it feels like some weird form of the “one-drop rule”, where if you’re still attracted to men at the end of the day, even just slightly, then you’re not actually or genuinely attracted to women and it’s all just fake and performative, and it’s not just lesbians who tend to have this mindset. it’s honestly pretty frustrating and misogynistic, like attraction to men automatically cancels out any attraction to women and that attraction to men is the only perceived “true” or “real” attraction.

i’ve also had someone online say to me in response to my bisexuality or female bisexuality in general “post scissoring or gtfo”, which i think is basically the epitome of what this post is about :/

sorry for the negative post, but this is like the only place where i can post something like this and i really want to get this off my chest because it’s honestly been bothering me a bit more than usual here recently.

sometimes i really do feel as if we’re one of the most hated queer groups considering how much heat we get in all different sorts of directions. we experience biphobia, specifically bimisogyny, from straight people, lesbians, gay men…i know bi men experience biphobia too of course, but the biphobia aimed at bi women especially just feels…different, and weirdly more prominent on the internet, at least that’s what it has been looking like to me.

but seriously, what has bi women done exactly to get this much hate from everyone? it’s like we committed a serious war crime and now we’re experiencing the consequences of it (ok that might be an exaggeration, but you get what im saying, lol). but im just over here simply living my life and minding my own business. it’s kinda wild how your ability or capability to love someone going beyond only one gender gets so much hate, scrutiny, and criticism.

and i won’t lie, sometimes it makes me really hate being bi, wishing i was just gay or straight. i know that sounds bad, but it’s only the truth and i can’t help but feel that way. and just because there were maybe a lot of girls that faked being bisexual because it was trendy or popular or whatever doesn’t mean that all of us were/are like that and that our sexuality is actually something genuine, that we’re not just trying to be “different” or “cool” or “unique”.

it’s all really depressing tbh and i worry all of this biphobia that’s been going on is just going to worsen my mental health (don’t worry i already see a therapist). i feel like being a bisexual woman has got to be a very lonely experience, especially if you have a female preference like me or are only interested in dating women. at least it feels that way for me personally. no wonder bisexual people have the highest rates of mental health issues among the sexual orientations.

thanks for reading and feel free to share your thoughts (this is my very first post… ;w;)